House of the Rising Sun
by keladryevangelinerhysenn
Summary: Azula is resigned to a life in captivity until a certain Water Tribesman falls through her roof and into her life. Once again she is thrown into a war game in which she is the wild card.
1. How The Mighty Have Fallen

**A/N: I'm back! I took a LONG break for the sobfest that was Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, but I'm back now!**

**And here I am, doing something I swore I would never do. **

**I'm turning Azula into an anti-hero. (anti-villain?)That means yes, this story will be Azula sympathetic. But I can promise that Azula is going to be beaten up quite a lot over the course of this story. So if you really don't like Azula but happen to be a sadist, stick around! Bear with me through the first chapter, it gets better, I promise. **

House of the Rising Sun

I. How the mighty have fallen

"_Have you ever thought that war is a madhouse and that everyone in the war is a patient?"_

Oriana Fallaci

For a brief period during her fleeting childhood, Princess Azula had been curious.

She had questioned the world around her and managed to gain an impressive amount of knowledge as most children do. Among other things, she learned how to bend lightning, how to lie with a straight face and how to control the people around her.

One day, something her uncle had said caught her attention, and she later went to her father to get more information.

"Father, what is fate?" She had asked earnestly with her hands clasped behind her back and her head tilted attentively to the side.

"Fate," Her father began evenly, "Is what common people call it when they don't know who is screwing them over."

And presently, someone was most definitely screwing her over.

Princess Azula was not locked up in a nondescript cell because of her breakdown during Sozin's Comet, and it certainly was not because she was destined to be there. When she had finally awoken everything had snapped into focus, her acute attention to detail had returned all at once.

One side of her face was pressed into a cold floor and bruises and small black lines where bamboo needles had pierced her skin now covered her arms. Every blue vein was visible through her translucent skin; she could tell that she had not been exposed to sunlight in a while.

The space was hardly sufficient for practicing firebending, and as it was, she was having difficulty producing a spark. She was enclosed in stone with no perceivable escape and had naught but a tiny window grate for company.

She was alone with her thoughts. Thoughts that were the best friends she ever had. Distorted memories, feelings, and the remnants of an emotional roller coaster were hopelessly mixed together. Sometimes she thought she heard voices, sometimes she thought there was someone standing just outside her peripheral vision. She knew she had been alone for far too long for anyone to be there. Her ears were ringing, her mind was swimming. Muddy, unattractive smudges of old eyeliner pooled beneath her eyes in the summer heat.

Vague images began to surface in the midst of her disorienting headache.

The first was father, denying her the right to lead their glorious invasion force at his side.

Then her brother, standing before a blood red sky, surrounded by plumes of smoke and fire.

Throbbing blue and orange infernos were consuming her empire; she cast her arm out, drawing a stream of fire. Among the blur of her recollections, it seemed as though everyday life was some sort of bazaar dance. Her empire was burning at her hand and she didn't care, she didn't care, she didn't care. Why had she ever cared?

Then she was laughing, then she was crying in front of her dresser.

As her hairbrush made impact with her mirror, Azula no longer saw her mother staring back at her with pity, but herself. All she saw was herself shattering into a million little pieces.

For a fleeting moment, she was chained to the ground in the courtyard of the palace she had grown up in. She was being weighed down by water; she had been left to drown again. Something indescribable was crushing her, breaking her, and she could not breathe. She was regurgitating blue flames, she was choking on power.

It was the most acute agony, detached and unbearable and frustrating.

She knew there had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation.

Under extreme stress it is not uncommon to completely detach from reality. There is a fine line between laughing, crying, and outright screaming, and Azula had never been very good at differentiating between her own emotions.

Whatever fever dream she had awoken from was now reflecting in her current reality. Shadows were jumping up the walls, phantom red and blue lights flashed behind her eyelids, whispers from nonexistent drafts pressed their lips against her ear.

Am I possessed? She thought absently, after an interminable amount of time.

Of course not. One of the voices replied. Azula smiled and silently agreed.

Perhaps she was a prisoner of war, in which case she would probably be freed shortly.

If she was a hostage, or bait for her father, she could easily escape the situation. She didn't need anyone to come and rescue her. She could handle her own problems and her father knew it.

Then again, it was also likely that she had been left here to die; likely that no one was coming for her, likely that her prison was inescapable, likely that she was doomed to decay with nothing but her illogical thoughts and an insignificant window grate.

But she didn't have to worry for very long.

The first time the previously invisible stone door swung out from the wall, Azula pretended to be completely civil. A man in deep crimson robes beckoned to her silently from the bright corridor.

She shamefully cringed at the unfamiliar light from her crumpled position in the corner and finally noticed the heavy chains that bound her ankles and her hands. Nonetheless, she recovered promptly and followed the man with sunken eyes out of the cell.

"Interesting accommodations you have here." She began in an attempt to get him to explain why exactly she had been locked in an austere and indisputably uncomfortable room. Even outside of her cell there was nothing but stone and orbs of fire suspended in the air. "Although it lacks a certain je ne sais quoi." She added in a bitter tone, trailing behind her guide unenthusiastically.

He seemed to reject her presence. The shadowy hallway made his face practically featureless. She overlooked his silence, this unremarkable man was clearly was not the person she needed to appeal to. Negotiations were imperative at this stage; she had to speak with her captors immediately.

Azula was intensely aware of her current position. She knew she was certainly an important prisoner, regardless of who had captured her. The clatter of her chains echoed constantly.

They crossed a hallway; Azula caught a glimpse of four panels of clouded colored glass at the very end of the tunnel that were barely emitting any light. She took note of it as a potential escape route.

A massive door creaked as the man opened it, urging her to enter. She dragged herself across the stone threshold and past the cloaked man. Azula did not know what was waiting beyond the doorway for her, but she made sure to maintain her poise despite the extra weight she carried. She had barely shuffled inside when the door shut behind her without warning.

In that moment Azula felt incredibly lethargic, the cuts she had somehow acquired while unconscious burned and itched, her muscles were sore and the weight of the chains had taken a toll on her weakened limbs. She briefly contemplated what would happen if she decided to just turn in for the rest of her life, and simply leave reality to deal with its own problems. That, however, was not in her nature.

"Ah, Princess Azula. It's wonderful to finally see you up and about." At the end of the narrow room a man in the traditional garb of a fire sage sat behind an immense desk surrounded by an inordinate amount of scrolls and papers.

"I suppose." She said coldly. Her situation had just gotten slightly more curious.

"Yes." He scrunched up his face at her, confused by her offhand response. His headdress tiled to the side and he made no attempt to adjust it. "And how are you feeling?"

"Fine, considering I have been lying on the floor in a dark cell. There must be some kind of misunderstanding." Ah, good old fashioned devious diplomacy, how refreshing.

"This must be disorienting for you." The sage tugged on his long white beard and placed his pen on the ebony desk. Azula crossed her arms. Her chains shifted loudly. He jumped up from his chair suddenly. "Oh dear, I apologize. I forgot we put those on when we fled from Azulon." He moved to detach the manacles. "The entire city was in turmoil." He added. "We have been taking care of you ever since."

The shackles fell away from the princess, but she still felt like they were there. She massaged her chafed wrists tentatively and took a step back from the sage.

"I see." She sneered. "And you think it is appropriate to keep me in such conditions?"

"You must understand, your grace, our actions are only meant to protect you. It is much safer here for you than it is anywhere else." There was something presumptuous about his attitude that Azula did not find favorable. She kicked the metal links away from her. "It is our duty to keep you secure until the Fire Lord takes full control of the country. You see, you had an… incident during the battle." He looked suddenly looked sad, maybe even disappointed as he acknowledged her major psychotic breakdown.

Azula felt dread rising in her like the tide. There had been truth to her visions after all. Something had gone terribly wrong and she couldn't even begin to devise a plan to fix it. "That was a fluke, I'm sure." She replied calmly, but sternly.

"I told my associate to bring you to me as soon as you awoke." He motioned to the door, behind which the cloaked man probably lurked. "We must know if your father mentioned anything about a secondary plan."

In hindsight, she realized she probably should have asked him. She had never thought that the Fire Nation could loose its stability so quickly and she certainly had not wanted to imply that she thought her father's plans would fail. She appraised the sage once more as she was sure he was evaluating her.

"Of course." She told him evenly, meeting his pale eyes with her own. "Why do you ask?"

"We don't get news from the mainland very often, so we are not sure what is going on. We thought you may have an educated prediction. Do you have any idea when?" He questioned her.

"Soon, I would assume. But nothing is for certain. While I have _greatly_ appreciated your _generous_ service, if the country is in as much turmoil as you imply, I must leave now to reassert my family's control." She said sarcastically, adding the smarmy idiot to her hit list. Even if he happened to be loyal to her father, he was still entirely useless in her mind.

The sage was silent and the princess stood up straighter. "Princess, you understand that you must remain here." He told her gravely.

Azula froze. It had become quite clear to her in that moment that they had always intended to be her captors, and not her caretakers. She swallowed and pursed her lips.

"Excuse me?"

"I am sorry, but it is the only way. When the Fire Lord starts making inquiries to your whereabouts, we will already have you here."

Azula was not familiar with what it felt like to be used as a means to an end.

But she instantly knew that she did not like it.

"Who told you that you could keep me here?" Her voice was trembling dangerously on the brink of hysteria. "Because they were grievously mistaken."

"We must not take any unnecessary risks, Princess."

"You don't have the authority to keep me here against my will!" She yelled. Suddenly she was contemplating using her discarded chains to strangle him. She heard the door behind her open.

"Sadly, Princess, I think you'll find that you no longer have the authority or the option to leave." He declared smugly. For a moment, Azula was supremely confused and it took her longer than usual to figure out why. No one had ever assumed a superior tone in her presence. But this man looked at her with something like pity or regret. He treated her like she was something broken and forgotten on a dusty shelf. Her authoritative mask abruptly fell away as shock set in. She looked away from the sage and every sound was drowned out by the roar of blood in her ears. Something had indeed gone very, very wrong.

Azula tried to summon her fire, but it still wouldn't come. She screamed at the old man as he took his seat behind his desk and picked up his pen once more, but he didn't respond, nor did he acknowledge her. She didn't know what she said to him, if she said anything at all. Soon multiple hands were on her, pulling her back out of the room. She clawed and kicked but the light show in her head had started up again, flashes blue and orange assaulted her. Entire walls of fire clashed and the phantom voices spoke once more, but this time it was her voice that echoed.

_"You can't treat me like this."_

_"You can't treat me like Zuko." _

* * *

><p><em>"I'm sorry it has to end this way brother."<em>

_"No you're not." _

The memories abruptly faded into nothing. Azula's eyes cracked open, gray light spilled in from the window grate in her cell. Her now greasy hair had fallen in front of her eyes. There was a patch of crusted blood on the crown of her head where one of the guards had thrown her against the stone wall. She slowly sat up, not coping very well with the vertigo. As she gradually righted herself, she saw a vertical streak of blood that had most likely been made when she had slid down the wall after being knocked unconscious.

_"What, no lighting today? Afraid I'll redirect it?" _

Azula punched the wall while holding back tears. It might have been some consolation to know exactly which fire lord had imprisoned her. The sages were involved in this war whether they liked it or not, and they were required to choose a side.

Zuko would have been understandable. She knew why he would lock her up, even though she had once done her best to keep him out of prison herself. Her father, however, was an entirely different case. If her father was indeed directly responsible for her incarceration, she really had been screwed over. At first she tried to convince herself that this was an impossible conclusion but she also reminded herself that he was quite possibly capable of anything. Nevertheless, the seed of doubt was planted and she couldn't help but wonder.

Every fortnight Azula would wake to find that clean clothes and some food had materialized on the floor. She stayed up for full days waiting for someone to open the handle-less stone door so she could run, but they never came.

She threw herself against the wall many times hoping to make it budge, but she only succeeded in bruising her shoulders.

She scaled the wall with her bare hands and reached the window grate, only to discover the sight of more stone. Eventually she fell to the ground with every single one of her nails broken and the skin flayed off her fingertips.

There was no difference between night and day now. She woke up at what seemed like midnight and would pass out at high noon. She ignored the food and water her captors provided in case it was blocking her bending. Even after three days of fasting, she still couldn't produce a spark. She blamed it on her prolonged time in a dark cell. Firebenders rose with the sun, but Azula awoke in the darkness.

She was pathetic, worthless. She had no resources and no allies and therefore she was powerless. She couldn't even get herself out of a simple box. Her father was not coming. Her countrymen were no longer loyal to her. All of her bridges had collapsed and her boats had burnt. Azula never thought it would be daunting to find herself with no one in the world she could rely on. Not even Ty Lee and Mai were there to help her come up with a clever escape plan. That was fine by her, she didn't need _them_. The instant she had decided to lock them up instead of killing them was a moment of weakness that would not happen ever again. Treachery would not be permitted in _her_ empire.

Azula imagined every possible outcome of the battle during Sozin's Comet. She tried to envision what could be going on during her absence but could never decide which option seemed most likely. Either her father had locked her away to prevent her from getting in his way and was now shaking his head at the embarrassment she caused him, or Zuko had put her here, cried a little bit, left her under the supervision of the supposedly humane sages, forgotten about her, and was now enjoying life as Fire Lord being fanned and fed peeled grapes by beautiful virgins on his golden throne. The image made Azula throw her fist into the wall once again. It was like her entire life had been a race to nowhere.

* * *

><p>She quickly found out that the fire sages were not humane at all.<p>

After a month or so had passed, eventually they began to mess up as she knew they would. Every so often the superior sage would call to see her, exchange pleasantries, make sure she had not gone insane in isolation, and have her escorted back. This gave Azula time to observe, and to plan.

She took a metal bar from the mess in the sage's study when he was not paying attention. She resisted smacking the unctuous bastard upside the head with it and smuggled it back to her cell. She later pried the stone door open and ran to the hall where she often saw light from stained glass even though it was the dead of night. She was beginning to feel the fire of freedom once again. There was a door there, but it was locked. She broke the glass and tried to break its hinges, but the sages and their guards were alerted by the noise and her escape failed miserably.

"Your crimes cannot go unpunished Princess." The superior sage told her gravely.

They held her down and sheared her long dark hair with a jagged knife; they cut her eyelashes off with rusty scissors. There was blood in her eyes as she knelt chained to the floor.

"Perhaps your shame and the shame you have brought upon your nation will be clearer to you now. I hope you will remember it constantly and remember why you are kept here."

She tried to wipe some of the blood away with her forearms because her wrists and hands were securely attached together. "I thought you sages believed in the dignity of all people." She spat.

"You still do have dignity Princess." He sighed. "Just not as much as you did before you came here."

"But it wasn't my choice to come here in the first place!"

"You have disappointed your family, and your people. We have shown you mercy, yet you are unappreciative. We have given you all the respect we can without losing our own honor." The old sage shook his head and closed the door of her cell.

The princess of the Fire Nation collapsed onto the filthy floor of her prison cell with her topknot cut off like a traitor. She bit into her shoulder, willing herself not to sob. The pain of every new injury made her nightmare a reality.

* * *

><p>Months passed but Azula did not try to escape again. She was a sleeping dragon, silent but always fuming. Guards were now posted in the halls closest to her cell. The sages were her captors, but they continued to act like her saviors, like they were doing her a favor by incarcerating her.<p>

Life was excruciatingly tedious. Madness seemed appealing and interesting in comparison. Her hair grew back quickly, but it would take a long time for it to return to its former glory.

She carved her name and all her titles into the solid rock and occupied herself by trying to run all the way up the wall, which kept her agile. She asked for a book occasionally and read with the meager light from the window grate and the cracks in the wooden ceiling.

Azula was meditating quietly on how she could recover from her situation when she heard yelling from the hallway. She tried to ignore it, but that eventually proved impossible. She rolled her eyes. "Do you mind?" She yelled, doubtful that they could actually hear her. The shouts seemed more distant, so she closed her eyes once more and took a deep breath.

This time an unexplainable sound disturbed her usual silence. She opened her eyes once more, but she couldn't quite place it. It was almost like whistling. Something was whistling like it was falling through the air…

Azula jumped up and pressed herself against the wall just as part of the ceiling caved in. Wooden planks and other debris crashed to the floor. Clouds of dust made it difficult to identify the projectile that had caused the damage. She squinted and approached it cautiously. Something inside the dust cloud began coughing and cursing. A small creature skidded to a halt at her feet. She stared down at it, dumbfounded, and it returned her gaze. She was not sure what bothered her more, the fact that she almost recognized the thing, or that it seemed to recognize her.

A figure popped out of the wreckage and Azula took a step backward.

"Damn firebenders on rooftops." He mumbled. He dusted himself off and looked around.

The dust settled, leaving nothing between the two of them. Azula was speechless in spite of herself.

To her horror, she found that she recognized the creature's companion as well.

The young water tribesman looked at her in wide-eyed disbelief. "Azula?"

**A/N: Okay first chapter! Yay! Please give me feedback early so I don't fuck this up. I already have about 30,000 words written but I'm hesitant to post the rest until I have a better idea of how it's all going to come together.**

**It seems to be turning into a dark!fic that's like a study of Azula's relationships with pretty much everyone in the show, so believe me when I say _everyone will be mentioned. _(even if they don't show up for a while) Currently this is filed as a Drama fic (I seem to lean toward those) but it may turn into angst (of course, it will be Azula _causing_ the angst, not feeling it...)**

**Mostly canon ships (Sokka and Azula will be bantering, but otherwise this is just a major ship tease, sorry! I like to be honest with my readers)**

**Moving on! Suggestions, corrections, love- clicky-clicky!**


	2. Rabbit Hole

Ch. II Rabbit Hole

**A/N: This is my big summer project for the summer, I'm happy I'm finally making a dent in it. So please, I implore you, R&R! Also, I should probably mention that I got the inspiration for this story while listening to Sinead O'Connor's version of House of The Rising Sun. Sorry this part is shorter than the last, but all chapters should be this length from now on.**

_In order to govern, the question is not to follow out a more or less valid theory but to build with whatever materials are at hand. The inevitable must be accepted and turned to advantage._

Napoleon

The young water tribesman looked at her in wide-eyed disbelief. "Azula?"

Given the circumstances, the only thing she could think to blurt out in response was: "You?"

"I should have known you would turn up in one of these places." His brow furrowed and he drew his sword as the initial shock wore off.

Azula let out a short absurd laugh. "Especially on your grand tour of the Fire Nation prison system, who would have thought-"

"What?" He said, looking at her as though he were seeing her for the first time. "Azula- you're not in a Fire Nation prison."

"Then pray tell, what kind of prison am I in?" She crossed her arms and scowled at him.

"This temple is overrun with loyalists…" He was beginning to look gradually more confused.

"Loyal to whom?" The entire building rumbled and more debris fell from the hole in the ceiling.

"Loyal to Ozai." Azula felt her spirits sink. "Your father." He added, as if she needed reminding. The Water Tribe brat was staring at her like she was going mad, but then it occurred to her that perhaps he thought she already had.

"Well look around you, moron! I'm not exactly getting the five star treatment around here!"

For a moment he said nothing and just looked at her, standing in beggar's clothes with a patchy haircut and crazy eyes. Azula had to look away and compose herself.

"Well I am _so_ sorry princess." He said with a healthy serving of sarcasm. "But I have better things to do than listen to your sob story." He was peering around now, looking for a way to leave. "It was great to see you, let's do this again sometime, maybe with tea and cakes."

"You'll never get out of here without my help." She told him confidently.

The warrior studied her carefully. "And how do you figure that?"

"This place is full of extremely powerful firebenders, masters of their art. By now they are all heading to this wing of the temple, they may even be outside now. Plus, this place is ancient. It's full of corridors and passages that you couldn't possibly hope to navigate on your own."

"How the hell are we going to get out of here then? There aren't any doors or windows." He raised his blade to the point where her neck joined her collarbone. "And if you really are a prisoner, I'm willing to bet you've never left this room."

"I'm the best chance you have." She raised her eyebrow and the corners of her lips twitched upwards.

"Can you really get us out of here?" Azula looked at the pointy end of the sword pointed at her neck and slowly raised her eyes to meet the face of the tribesman that held it. He glared at her with precise hostility, impatiently awaiting her reply. So Azula said the only thing she could.

"Yes."

"Let's go then."

She instantaneously lunged forward in an attempt to grab his sword. The much taller boy easily held it out of her reach. "I need that." She insisted, refusing to demean herself by jumping for it.

"Seriously?" The boy paused and stared at her as though he was considering it, and then started to laugh hysterically. He wiped a tear away from the corner of his eye. "Sorry-I'm just not that stupid!" He shook his head.

Azula glared at him. "The hinges only go one way. You need something strong and thin to pry it open." She ran her fingers over the wall, easily finding the familiar vertical line. The shouts were growing closer now.

"Then I'll do it, there is no way I'm letting you touch this. You would kill me in an instant if you got the chance. Hell, I may not even get out of this alive." He went to work on the door, all the while grumbling about insolent, deranged princesses. Azula crossed her arms and tapped her foot impatiently.

Finally, the warrior wrenched the door open. She burst into the hall before he had a chance to, and took off down the familiar corridor. She truly hoped her half-assed plan would work. The Water Tribe barbarian was close on her heels despite her attempt to lose him. She felt her firebending coming back as she ran, her chi was slowly but surely reigniting. Her power was coming back. She snapped her fingers desperately, trying to produce a spark.

The princess, the savage, and the odd lemur skidded into the next cavernous passage and froze. A crowd of fire sages waited for them to the left. Azula quickly glanced to the right where the stained glass door was and calculated her chances of out-running their attacks. The building began shaking violently before she could take action. She slid into the wall, trying to support herself. Sokka wasn't so lucky; his feet were swept out from under him. He landed with a loud crack and rolled into the stone. The ancient foundations roared and the walls screeched as part of the ceiling caved in, covering the firebenders.

"Toph." Sokka said under his breath, using the wall to right himself. Azula dusted herself off before turning back to the door out of this place, and her freedom.

But the door was open. More of the firebending masters and their guards had surrounded them during the chaos. There was an insurmountable amount of hooded guards armed with shining scythes and the firebenders took their attack positions. Sokka's jaw had hit the floor and he was standing before them like a rabaroo in front of an oncoming boulder.

Azula leapt into the air and blocked the inferno before it could reach him. She split the wall of fire in half with her forearms and returned the assault with twice the force. The guards crumbled and even the firebenders were disoriented. She landed on her feet, swift as always, and ran toward the end of the corridor in the midst of the pandemonium.

Her breath stopped in her throat when she dashed out into the sunlight. She was standing on the roof of a temple, and there was no where to run. Azula had certainly not anticipated this. She walked over to the side.

"Great! How exactly are we supposed to get out of this? Was this your plan the entire time? To throw me to my death?" Sokka followed her, clutching his sword with his quivering lemur wrapped around his neck.

Azula rolled her eyes, but knew he had a point. The firebenders wouldn't be deterred for long. She peered over the edge and looked down. "Do you trust me peasant?" She asked suddenly.

"No." He answered immediately.

"Why?" She inquired. "I just saved you from those firebenders."

"It probably has something to do with your mouth being open." He said wryly.

"That's too bad; you really don't have a choice."

She grabbed his forearm and launched them both over the side. Then they were spinning through the air, gaining speed. Sokka screamed. Azula held his arm like a vice even though her own was slick with blood.

With a sickening thud they landed on a fluffy white surface. It took them both a moment to realize that they were flying horizontally instead of falling downward. They were on the back of the Avatar's flying water bison, and very much alive. "I'll never get used to that." He gasped. "From now on we are coordinating our escape plans!" Azula finally let go of the Water Tribe boy and started to cackle as they moved farther away from the temple. Sokka was still too stunned to move, and shocked that he had somehow survived with the help of this insane princess that he was now forced to deal with. She laughed uncontrollably and for a few blissful moments, she didn't care if the entire world thought she was raving mad.

* * *

><p>"Why did you do it?" Sokka called to Azula. The sun was setting in the valley that they had settled in.<p>

"Do what peasant?" She sighed, kneeling by a small stream streaked with the red rays of the setting sun. One of the sage's guards must have slashed at her with his dao blades when she was blocking the fire of the sages. Her cheap shirt had been torn to shreds and she was now sporting twin gashes on both her arms. Azula stripped off what was left of her shirt; she had lost any sense of modesty she had left months ago. The cold mountain water soothed her wounds.

"You saved my life." Sokka grumbled, sitting beside the blind earth bender who was apathetically eating an apple.

"Did I?" She had to think back. "Oh." She finally said dejectedly. "I suppose I did."

Sokka chose to ignore the trace of disappointment in her tone. "You could have avoided the flames, why did you stop them?"

"Does it matter?" She asked acerbically, binding her wounds with the last part of her shirt.

"Shut up Snoozles, you shouldn't question the motives of a madwoman, there's really no point." Toph's commented.

"At least one of you has some sense." Azula said in exasperation.

"I think I have every reason to question her motives!" Sokka said in outrage.

"It was a reflex!" Azula protested.

"I have a hard time believing that." He informed her, narrowing his eyes.

"That much is evident you useless ingrate." She snarled, folding her arms over her chest.

"Enough!" Toph roared, covering her ears. "Just _shut up_! You two are so annoying!"

"I wouldn't be so annoying if _she_ wasn't here!" Sokka yelled impudently, proving the small earthbender's point.

"Well I am _so sorry_ for accidentally saving your life. I promise it won't ever happen again." She said, dramatically rolling her eyes. "I swear I didn't do it on purpose." Azula paused and adjusted her improvised bandages. "It will, however, be a lot harder for you to lock me up if you owe me a life debt."

"What?" Sokka shouted in horror. "I didn't ask you-"

"That doesn't change the fact that you would be dead right now if I hadn't intervened." She replied calmly.

"Well you wouldn't be here right now if I hadn't broken you out! And would you put some clothes on?" Sokka threw one of his shirts at her, finding it increasingly harder to argue with a half naked girl.

"I was not in immediate mortal peril when you decided to drop in. We are irreversibly bound by the spirits themselves, a life debt is one of the most important you could possibly owe. You are honor bound to repay me, and there is only one way to do so." Azula pulled his shirt over her head and smoothed out her short hair with her slender fingers.

Sokka hid his face in his hands. "I can't believe this is happening." He moaned.

"I guess you'll have to stay close to us for a while then." Toph added unexpectedly.

"What?" Azula raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I'm assuming in order to save your life, you have to be pretty close to Sokka, right?" The girl threw a chunk of metal to her and Azula caught it effortlessly. The metal instantly welded around her wrists and she gasped.

"Those are to discourage you from going too far. Looks like you're coming back to the capital with us, Princess." Toph said sarcastically, insinuating that maybe she wasn't worthy of the title.

Azula gritted her teeth and clenched her fists. Suddenly this scene was looking oddly familiar.

"We're going back to Capital Island?" Sokka asked. Apparently, this was news to him as well.

"I think we need to cut our trip short." Toph said smugly. "Zuko will want to see what we found."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Okay, still building up to the actual plot here. I have always thought a return to superficial normalcy for Azula would be a little more... painful than others. **

**It's 9pm EST and I'm still in my work clothes. Please help me get through tomorrow and post your feedback (anyone can), I'm glad for all the subscriptions but I worry I'll lose you, so please tell me if I'm doing something hinky... asides from you know... the general craziness of this. **


	3. Red Dragon, Blue Dragon

Ch. III Red Dragon, Blue Dragon

**A/N: Wooooooooo! I am getting. shit. DONE! Just kidding this is the biggest advance regarding this story that I've made all week. I tacked a few sentences onto what I've written of Chapter 12 so far and I posted this. That's about it. **

**In case any of you were wondering, the fictional character I most resemble in appearance and character is Sailor Moon. That's what I was watching when I could have been being productive… oh well. Enjoy!**

"_The mind is its own place, and in itself/ Can make a heaven of hell, or a hell of heaven." _

Milton, _Paradise Lost_

"Zuko's been looking for you for ages- since you disappeared right after Sozin's Comet. He was worried because it's been so quiet; there hasn't been any news about you for months." Sokka said suspiciously, sharpening his sword on an oilstone.

"I accidentally fell into their clutches. I don't remember anyone taking me anywhere." She was sitting in the lotus position in the dead center of flying water bison's back, trying to focus on anything but metal encircling her wrists. When she did, she vividly felt as if she was drowning in fire and water at the same time. It was an empty feeling, somehow.

"Why were they keeping you there?"

Azula paused and took a silent deep breath. "I imagine they thought I had disgraced my father and they believed they would gain his approval if they captured me and waited for him to come back. They believed they were showing their loyalty by punishing me." She said factually, rolling her wrists in their constraints. She had been told it would take less than a day to reach Capital Island, and ultimately return to the sight of her greatest defeat as a prisoner. Her failure was one of the only things in her life that she had not choreographed. She didn't even have the luxury of options or allies that she could temporarily rely on.

Being coy seemed to be her best option at the moment. When a new opportunity saw fit to come her way, she would seize it. Spontaneous decisions currently seemed to be working for her.

"Me and Toph have been taking out loyalist groups for weeks, and none were as organized as them." Sokka mused.

"Those lunatics with a warped sense of justice are really your most worrisome threat?" Azula said bitterly, giving her only seeing captor an ironic smirk. He caught her gaze for a moment, then began to sharpen his blade more enthusiastically.

"Listen to the raven calling the crow black." Toph scoffed from her position steering on Appa's head.

"You would know what black looks like wouldn't you?" Azula said snidely.

"Don't you worry; you'll face real justice soon enough." Sokka indicated the horizon with a tilt of his head. The towers of Azulon were just visible through the clouds. "You're almost home."

* * *

><p>Azula slid off the great white beast's tail into one of the palace's many courtyards. The fire lilies were in full bloom and the summer sun was beating down on the thriving gardens. She had let nearly an entire year pass in captivity.<p>

"I'm going to see if I can get fluffy here some hay." The small earthbender patted Appa's head. "You think you can handle _her_?" She asked Sokka, making her dislike for the older girl apparent.

"Nooooo problem." Sokka said confidently.

Azula covered her eyes with her hands and sighed loudly.

"Hey, being stuck with you isn't exactly a treat for me either missy." He pointed an accusatory finger at the bridge of her nose.

Azula shook her head. "You're an idiot." She really didn't feel like dealing with him at the moment.

"I wouldn't be talking schizo." He rolled his eyes scathingly.

"Oh really? What's that over there?" She pointed off into the distance, as if she was challenging him to prove his intelligence.

"Ha! There's _nothing_ over there! It must have been one of your hallucin-" Sokka looked back and forth frantically, but Azula had disappeared. He drew his sword and took off in the other direction before sheer panic could set in. There was only one place she could be going in the general vicinity, and her appearance there boded potentially catastrophic events. "Shit." He breathed.

Azula had taken off and she was running barefoot through the castle, knocking over serving maids and courtiers as she whirled through the many pavilions and passages of her childhood home. Her legs were burning after months of lying on a stiff floor. She concentrated her energy on the metal linking her hands and heated it red hot before twisting them apart, forming two drab bracelets. She found that she remembered every twist and turn, the layout of the palace, _her _palace, came back to her naturally. She reached the last corridor lined with torches in the shape of dragon heads with open mouths. The massive double-doors were already wide open, welcoming her.

Everything was as she expected. The high ceilings were illuminated by the lines of fire that confirmed the Fire Lord's presence. Shadows were cast along the walls of the familiar throne room. The members of the High Council were involved in their daily briefing; various diplomats were awaiting attention. She knew the scene well.

At first, no one noticed that she had slipped into the room. She stood in the center of the grand columns, only a small disheveled figure in the vast hall, but no less striking.

"Zuzu!" She called out boldly, flicking an uneven strand of dark hair out of her eyes. Her voice echoed unsettlingly in the large hall, silencing everyone present. The entire room seemed to inhale collectively. "I'm back!" Somewhere in the background, a servant dropped a platter; someone else emitted a short scream.

In her opinion, he looked ridiculous. His firelord's headpiece was accentuated only by the awful scar that was still smeared across his face. She stared at him expectantly, daring him to face her, to fight her. For a moment he squinted at her. Azula knew she looked different, but she was undoubtedly recognizable. The water tribe warrior sprinted in beside her at that point, gasping for air and attempting to speak at the same time.

Zuko met her gaze evenly for a moment. "Ah, Azula. I knew this day would come." He stood calmly, but made no other advance toward her. There was no hint of sarcasm in his voice, no trace of malice or distaste, just solemn honesty. "We have been expecting you."

Azula, not used to reactions that she did not already anticipate, was stunned. In fact, Zuko doing something that she did not expect was certainly something she had not been expecting.

Where was the honor guard he was supposed to set on her? The cage that was supposed to fall from the ceiling? Her eyes darted from left to right, but nobody moved except for the lemur, who scampered to the unperturbed Avatar on the dais. There was no cage waiting to trap her hanging from the ceiling and no one but a panting Sokka behind her.

"Oh really?" She asked with false sweetness. "Then where is my welcome party?"

After a pause, Zuko started to laugh in an unusually reserved manner. "I suppose you're referring to the legion of soldiers I'm meant to spring on you?"

"Quite." She said shortly.

"No need." He shrugged.

In an instant Azula felt a stab of pain and something sprouted out of her neck. She only just managed to wrench the long, brightly feathered needle out of her flesh before she fell to her knees and her vision went blank.

* * *

><p>A bag was pulled off of her head; someone was pulling her eyelids up and gently slapping her cheeks. Her surroundings were blurred and all voices sounded long, drawn out, and empty. A splash of cold water greeted her bleary eyes. Azula spluttered, coughed, and immediately struggled against her bonds. Her hands were tied to one of the velvet upholstered mahogany chairs in a board room within the palace. The avatar returned the chilled water to a pitcher on the long table in front of her.<p>

"Curare. It's an herbal soporific." Zuko's voice said. "We got it from our new friends in the swamp. It's very useful."

"You were drooling!" Sokka informed her cheerily.

Azula attempted to stand upon discovering that her legs were not tied to anything.

"Not so fast, Crazula." Toph shoved her back into her chair before she made any progress.

Azula scowled and glared at all of them, her wet hair was sticking to her cheeks. Sokka and Toph had probably informed their companions about the events of recent history while she was unconscious. "What do you want from me?" She spat through clenched teeth.

Azula once again found herself in an undesirable situation.

"What makes you…?"

"I'm in a relatively nice room and I'm still alive. Of course you want something from me, don't insult my intelligence by suggesting you don't." Azula was not sure how she felt about this; she loathed not being able to control a situation. It all depended on what exactly they wanted her to do. She was half convinced that they were going to ask her to betray her father, which she would never do, despite what they offered her.

Zuko took a deep breath. "You're right." He admitted painfully. He started pacing and ran his fingers through his loose hair. His sister watched him incredulously. "King Kuei has abandoned his throne in Ba Sing Se, and there is conflict concerning who should take his place now that his dynasty has ended. The Earth Kingdom would not appreciate the Fire Nation getting involved in its affairs at the present moment either, considering it was liberated less than a year ago. Since then, Long Feng has returned- and he seems to be a likely candidate for the throne. He is supported by all of the most powerful noble families, and drove the liberators from the city just weeks after they arrived…" Azula's current jailors shot each other nervous looks at that point.

"So Long Feng has swooped in, claimed an open throne, and become the savior of Ba Sing Se." Azula drawled and rolled her eyes. "I'm not surprised that low-life is trying to crawl to the top again. But what has this got to do with me?"

"This is a delicate situation." He warned her. "International relationships are too fragile for me to be harboring someone like you. I can't keep you here forever; especially now that my friends have assured me that you are relatively sane."

"It would probably be good for you to do some community service before that happens." Sokka said, munching noisily on fire flakes.

Zuko took a deep breath. "We need you to infiltrate Ba Sing Se and make sure that Long Feng is not planning anything."

"No." Azula said immediately.

"The Fire Nation _and_ Ba Sing Se could be in danger again." The avatar implored her.

"Maybe you don't exactly understand the kind of trouble you're in." Toph said threateningly, punching the beautiful table and splintering the wood.

"No, I understand. You want me to keep my old friend Long Feng out of the picture. Isn't that the job of your avatar? You know, the oversized baby who got a hold of some blue paint?" Azula pointed at Aang, who looked surprised that she was referring to him at all.

"We've talked about this a lot and I think the person for the job. No one knows the turf as well as you." The Avatar said tentatively. "You have infiltrated Ba Sing Se before; we were just hoping you could do it again." Aang gave a little shrug.

Azula emitted a long, low, tolling laugh, like a bell announcing the midnight hour. "And you expect me to dispose of the city's current ruler and just hand it over to you and expect nothing in return?"

"Your life should be payment enough." Sokka drew his sword and placed it under her chin once more. Azula found that she was growing quite apathetic to its presence.

"What's to keep me from joining Long Feng? And let's not forget that you would have to die in my place, considering I've already saved _your_ life."

"You let her do _what_?" Zuko shouted.

"You would be free." Aang assured her.

"Until someone captured you and turned you in, of course." Toph added unhelpfully.

"What the hell were you thinking? A life debt to _her_ is a fate _worse_ than death!" Zuko yelled at Sokka in the background.

"I want Ba Sing Se!" She shouted suddenly. She had gotten their attention. "You want me to retake the city? Fine. But I want to keep it." She told them straightforwardly.

"After everything you've done, what makes you think that we would ever let _you _control a country _ever_ again?" Sokka crossed his arms.

"I was born to rule. You said yourself that the seat was open, and at this point, I think I am perfectly qualified for the position." She said evenly.

"We don't even know if that's a possibility…" Aang's voice trailed off.

"Nothing worth possessing can ever quite be possessed. Take that into consideration." The Firelord mused.

"You are not going to silence my demands by using Uncle's senseless epigrams." Azula snarled.

"You are in no place to be making requests, let alone demands." Zuko turned away from her.

"You're desperate." She told him, smiling through pursed lips He glanced back at her in disgust. "I'm assuming the peaceful Avatar approach didn't work- and Long Feng is not cooperating at all now. That's why you needed to bring _me_ out of the closet. In this case, I'm just someone you've enlisted to finish the job. If I am going to do it, I'm going to need to be persuaded. Because I'm worth it, wouldn't you say?"

No one had anything to say to that.

"We will discuss what happens to you after you complete your assignment. And you're not going alone." Her brother informed her.

"And if I fail?" Azula inquired stoically. She was eager to see how good Zuko was at running the family business.

"All we want you to do is prevent another war and not instigate one. If you can manage _that_, Azula, then we'll discuss it when you get back." He said, sitting in the seat across from her complacently.

"Spoken like a true politician." She said coldly. "So who am I taking with me to ensure that I complete this _mission_."

"We'll all go!" Aang said with his usual conviction.

"I don't really see what you have to do with this, Avatar. At this stage, blatantly overthrowing Long Feng would be imprudent. I'm going to collect information that could lead to his downfall or indicates that he is an immediate threat and nothing else. I don't exactly want to draw attention to myself."

"I'll go with her." They all turned to look at Sokka. "I may get a chance to save her life." He shrugged.

Azula narrowed her eyes. "Very well. But there will be many more complications. If another war is indeed coming, everyone will have scores to settle, And no one will be spared."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Anddddd ending on an ominous note! Maybe I'll post another part sometime this week. If I get enough reviews. (*laughs evilly*) **

**There may come a time when you do not hear from me for a very long time. But I have every intention of seeing this through, so fear not. I might as well post what I have!**

**Review, please! **


	4. Sic Vis Pacem, Para Bellum

**A/N: I told myself that if I got 1000 hits before Thursday I'd post another chapter! Yay! **

**The title of this chapter is: If You Want Peace, Prepare for War **

**My logic is if Zuko believed (or wanted to believe) so many of his sister's lies, then he must care about her to some extent. We begin with Azula figuring out a new way to defend herself…**

Chapter IV Sic vis patrem, para bellum

_Entrepreneurs are simply those who understand that there is little difference between obstacle and opportunity and are able to turn them both to their advantage._

Machiavelli:_The Prince_

An arrow fletched with blue feathers sunk into a target in the palace courtyard with a satisfying thunk. Azula smiled to see that it had not only gone through the center, but had also punched through the back. She enjoyed the devilish red glow cast over the city by the early morning sun.

"I've never seen anything like it." The painted leader of the Yu Yan archers told Zuko in a hushed tone. "Three days ago she showed up at practice and now she's probably just as good as any of us." He thanked the man quietly and sent him on his way.

It was almost surreal having his sister in the castle again, like seeing an apparition in a dream. It was no wonder that she was unrecognizable to so many people. She was wearing black today, stripped of the gold trimmed armor that marked a victorious general. The edge of her hair just brushed her sharp jaw line, barely enough to hold her characteristic bun and her simple crown.

"So when I tell you that you're forbidden to firebend on Capital Island…"

Azula glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and did not immediately reply. Zuko began to wonder if she was going to ignore him.

Zuko had politely told hundreds of people that his sister was slowly going mad somewhere far from home. He told them that that she was alone with her jealously, rage, and malice in some unspecified location where she couldn't harm the people of the realm. Now she had somehow reverted to the cool, poised creature he had always known. She was quieter now though, more withdrawn and less outspoken. He privately wondered if it was something to be concerned about.

"You already have them following me night and day. I think it would be wise to learn their art." She said frankly, loosing another arrow. He took a step backward, realizing how close he had been standing to her line of fire. Azula had probably realized it long before he had.

"Afraid I'm going to _assassinate_ you?" She inquired mockingly, as though he wasn't important enough to be assassinated and not just "murdered".

"You always do the unexpected. I have come to expect it of you." He echoed without a trace of irritation. Azula grimaced and let another arrow fly dangerously close to his shoulder.

"Are you ready to leave?" He continued awkwardly, shifting his feet beneath his robes.

"Nearly. I want to get there at dusk."

"The airship will let you off in the valley beyond the city. I can't get you any closer than that."

"Shouldn't be an issue." She sniffed arrogantly. "It's a fool's errand, you know." She added in an exasperatingly light tone.

"What do you mean?" Zuko's voice was precariously patient.

"Trying to keep peace is counter productive." She slung a quiver full of arrows and a finely crafted bow over her shoulder. "There will never be pure, unadulterated peace in this world. If it was even a possibility your friend the Avatar wouldn't exist." She waved her hand dismissively.

"There is peace in the world in the person of the avatar." He answered without having to think.

Azula crossed her arms and quirked an eyebrow at him. "You'll kill yourself trying to change the nature of things. The only way to survive war is to win it."

"There are no winners in war, Azula." He said grimly, watching her saunter toward the exit of the courtyard. "Only losers."

She suddenly pivoted to face him. "Tell that to father the next time you visit him." She slithered toward him once again. "No one was completely victorious in this war because you can't finish what you started." She said quietly and precisely. "As for you and I, well, we are undeniably diametrically opposed. There is no compromise, there can only be one finality- you or me." At a mere five feet five inches she still seemed taller than him. "In the end, your mercy will doubtlessly be your downfall."

"I guess that's the difference between you and me, Azula." His temper had flared at the mention of their father and the insinuation that he had somehow failed.

"Finally." She whispered, looking up at him. "Something we can agree on"

She took off once more into the depths of the palace, leaving him alone with his jealously, rage, and malice. Zuko watched as she became nothing more than a retreating dark spot in the pale glow of the morning sun.

* * *

><p>Azula was positive that Zuko was not even considering her request.<p>

"Why should I follow you?" Sokka complained, not unreasonably.

"I lived here for a few weeks after I conquered the city. I got to know the place pretty well before my life fell apart." She sighed, hunching her shoulders.

The last time she had seen Ba Sing Se, she had been its conqueror. Now she had returned as an outsider. Azula doubted that she would ever be the ruler of the great city again because Zuko would never seriously consider her demands.

Long Feng was obviously trying to depict himself as the kindly rescuer of the kingdom by allowing just about everyone into the city freely. The guards didn't seem to notice them as they passed through the massive gates. Azula remembered how desperate she had been to break through them at one point. Now it seemed absurd to simply walk through the front door.

"We'll walk from here." She commanded, hiking the bow up over her shoulder.

"But that will take all night!" Sokka was practically running to keep up with her pace and still coming up short.

"I could commandeer a vegetable cart." She said sardonically, smirking at his obvious discomfort.

He stopped in the deserted street and crossed his arms. "You clearly don't know your way around this city as well as you think you do. How often did you leave the comfort of the castle?"

"Are you trying to insult me?" She said severely, glaring at him.

He smiled at her deviously. "Come on, I'll show you."

* * *

><p>The idea of the ruthless princess known for penetrating the impenetrable city taking public transportation was a strange one. That's probably why none of the normal, unsuspecting citizens of Ba Sing Se bothered to give her a second glance.<p>

Azula was uncomfortably curled up on a seat, trying to keep as far away from the other people in the trolley car as possible. Sokka stood beside her seat with his hand in his pocket, grinning to himself and relishing in her agitation. "Maybe next time you visit you should focus on sight seeing and less on conquering the place." He muttered to her. She struggled to keep from garroting him on the spot.

Fortunately, there were not many people taking the earthbender-powered train this late at night. She watched the darkened city disappear in a blur from one of the open windows. The hole her supposedly failsafe drill had made in the 20 foot thick wall had not been repaired and remained untouched. Somehow she didn't think they kept it there to honor the memory. No one had bothered to repair it because the walls were still penetrated; another illegitimate ruler indifferent to the welfare of the city had claimed the throne. It was quite possible that no one could undo the damage Azula had caused.

They reached the platform for the castle and Sokka had crossed his arms as the train sped off to its next location, blowing Azula's hair into a tangled mess in the process.

"See? Isn't taking the lowly transportation of common folk an exciting change from your luxuriant lifestyle?"

"No." She spat, straightening out her loose hair. "I am not a halfwit like Kuei was. It was awfully clever of Long Feng to isolate him, only to have him discover the wonders of the world and never return. He deserted the throne and left it open for the closest person to snatch." Sokka's eyes widened as Azula took off toward the base of the garrison.

They climbed the wall protecting the compound. "A necessary risk." Azula had insisted. They scrambled past the sentries on the wall and reached an unoccupied watchtower with a full view of one of the side entrances. The Dai Li had not dispersed but had returned to their former master shortly after her disappearance. Azula had yet to spot one of them. It was no longer a thriving cultural center, she noted. The entire compound was silent, and no one was walking across the courtyard. She loaded her bow and aimed at the guards standing by the gate.

"Wait, can't you just run up to them and go 'Rawr! I'm a firebender! Let me in or I'll incinerate you!" Sokka made movements will his arms like he was some kind of velociraptor.

Azula slowly turned her head away from her target and looked back at him. He cowered under her gaze. "That is the most misguided, idiotic plan I have ever heard. I think I'll recommend you for the position of palace fool when it opens up."

Sokka shook his head and grew a backbone while trying to articulate his message. "Look, we don't have to kill them."

Azula turned her attention back to her targets. "Oh?"

"I have my boomerang; I could easily take them out."

"Fascinating, but hardly efficient. We can't risk them alerting the castle of our presence too soon. The worst a boomerang would do is knock them out." She adjusted her aim.

"That's a good thing!" He said urgently.

Azula let an arrow fly and the first man fell with the shaft sprouting out of his eye. She made quick work of the second and grinned proudly.

"Sadist." Sokka grumbled in annoyance.

"Pacifist." She retorted.

They descended from the wall and traveled through the shadows. She plucked a key from the belt of one of the dead guards and swiftly opened the door. Sokka slipped in behind her. She expected Long Feng to have made multiple security adjustments but he hadn't. She was all the more cautious as she slid trough the damp corridors that she had once proudly strolled through. The lanterns were made of glowing green crystals, which made it impossible for her to simply put out all the lights.

Her unnecessary companion crept beside her with his sword drawn, waiting to preserve her life from nonexistent hidden attackers. Given the lack of encompassing illumination, he continually bumped into her. (She stopped short once and shocked him so badly that his hair stood up like a boarcupine's quills and he twitched uncontrollably for a full minute.) After climbing what seemed like an aimless flight of stairs and passing through too many doors to count, Sokka was beginning to regret even considering letting her lead him around the castle, even though it was far too late.

When they came across three wayward Dai Li agents on an unlucky coffee break, Azula removed the sword from Sokka's hand and cleanly slit their throats before they were able to sound any alarm or successfully defend themselves.

"We'll have to start running soon. Keep up- or I'm leaving you behind." She told Sokka while wiping the blade off on his shirt, leaving a bloody slit in the cloth.

"Yeah, considering the trail of bodies," He snatched his sword back from her, "you might as well have set off fireworks to announce our arrival!" Azula ignored his barb and peered around the next corner. Almost silently, aside from Azula and Sokka's trained ears, 20 more Dai Li agents emerged from behind them. Sokka would swear later that one popped out from a decorative vase.

She found herself running again, leading her pursuers on a merry chase through the mazes of the castle. Sokka was close on her heels. She skidded to a halt, threw open a linen closet and dragged him in beside her.

The princess had one newly manicured hand clenched around Sokka's mouth and her forearm was pinning him to the wall. There was something gratifying about the fact that she had him in the same position she had been in during the Day of Black Sun, even though that felt like it occurred a lifetime ago.

They were pressed between rock and fresh tablecloths and sheets, some of them were scarlet remnants from the occupation. Unable to contain himself, Sokka ran his tongue along her palm. Azula shocked him with an even more powerful spark than before, and it took all of his self control to prevent himself from crying out in alarm as bright blue electricity coursed through his limbs. Azula looked at her hand with a comically horrified expression and held it away from her like it was cursed.

The unmistakable patter of feet and urgent whispers soon faded. "When I open this door, run as fast as you can." She whispered harshly when their breathing calmed down slightly. Her nails still scraped his skin where she was grasping his shirt. The space was too limited for her to move away. "There are too many of them and I don't have time to convince the entire Dai Li to enter my service once again."

"Why don't you just burn them all?" He snapped. "It seems to have worked for you in the past."

"Anonymity." She answered as though it was obvious.

"Don't you think you should tone it down and maybe pretend not to be a menace to society?" She kept looking toward the door as though it would open.

"The public holds me to a certain standard as far as my attitude and actions go. I would cause a crisis if I stopped acting like this now. And why does everyone just assume I incinerate every problem I encounter?" She rolled her eyes in exasperation.

Sokka scowled, looking somewhat perplexed in the meager light. "Because it's true, at least in my experience."

"Then you had better run." She threw the door open, slipped out from the closet, and flew down the hall as if she was using her feet as rockets. It wasn't long before she heard shouts. Guards were on alert in every corner, and she knew they would be on her in a heartbeat. Stealth would not help her in the rustic castle; there was no where for her to hide. All the palaces' ornaments and antiques had been sold by order of the Firelord. Long Feng had evidently not been in office long enough to replenish them. There were only vast networks of hallways for her to hide in, and even the dark labyrinths couldn't conceal her very well. _I hate the earth kingdom. _Azula thought spitefully.

The Water Tribe warrior seemed determined to match her speed, and was gliding along beside her with his sword still drawn. His long strides easily kept pace with hers, and a wicked idea struck her. The Dai Li were pressing ever closer, pulling earthen barriers up before them. She easily navigated around them, the faithful Dai Li seemed to have forgotten that she was a seasoned professional.

After a few more turns they lost them for a moment, but neither Azula nor Sokka wanted to be the one caught off guard, so they kept moving. Sokka seemed more nervous than she was. He was looking over his shoulder every few seconds and breathing heavily. Azula had the benefit of knowing where all of the secret passages were. She had scaled the castle from top to bottom when she had first arrived. There wasn't any down side to knowing all the secrets of a fortress, after all. She knew she had to abandon him before they were cornered, and she had to make it seem like it was his fault.

She fell back ever so slightly, and the warrior never suspected a thing. Azula took a sharp turn down another corridor, approached a door she knew would be open, and flung it open.

She snapped the door shut behind her, placing her palms on the damp wood. Azula closed her eyes briefly and allowed a silent exhale to pass through her lips before turning to face the library.

The walls were covered from floor to ceiling with ancient tomes filled with trivial information from days long past. Candles not hazardous to the soggy archives were balanced on every available flat surface. A lanky man sat at the lone table in the room with a steaming teapot.

"Welcome, Princess Azula of the House of Agni: the rising sun, the First of her name, Dynasty of Sozin and Daughter Ozai, Heiress to the Throne of the Fire Nation." Long Feng listed her titles unnecessarily while gracefully pouring tea. "I was beginning to worry that I would not be blessed with the honor of your presence."

**A/N: As always, anyone can review. Especially this week. I could use something nice**.


	5. Every Tyrant's Heart

**Could use some reviews tonight folks. Sorry it's a little bit short! Hope you enjoy. **

Ch. V Every Tyrant's Heart

"_In every tyrant's heart there springs in the end this poison, that he cannot trust a friend" _Aeschylus

"I was beginning to worry that I would not be blessed with the honor of your presence." He smiled graciously at her. "Please, join me." He indicated the seat opposite to his.

"I'm glad I could put your fears to rest." She said icily, hesitant to move from her position by the easiest escape route. "I hope you haven't been expecting me for too long." She eyed the set up of the table suspiciously.

"I am told that the members of the occupation resided in this wing of the castle. When I was notified that you had come to pay the place a visit, I just assumed this tunnel that leads to the lower ring would be a highlight of your stay." He gestured to the oriental rug beneath his feet.

"Ah yes, so you know of my fondness for underground passageways." She drawled, remaining sentinel by the door. When Long Feng had been in power before, even the walls had ears. Nothing was a secret in the Upper Ring.

"A sadly overlooked aspect of your personality, I'm sure. Certainly a woman of your cultured tastes would enjoy some tea?" He responded carefully.

"Unfortunately, I fear my visit must be a short one." She said darkly, feeling the energy gathering in her fingertips.

"By now my agents have apprehended your companion, and I'm sure neither of us would want harm to befall him." He said.

"Au contraire, I do not care for him in the least. But if you care for his wellbeing as much as you claim to, you had best move him to a safer location." She twisted her lips into a wry line.

"Come now princess, you must have time to share civil conversation with an old acquaintance."

"Acquaintance, yes." She sneered. If her future plans did not depend so much on this fraud she would have laughed and spat in his face. She approached the table despite her misgivings.

"Please accept my tea as a sign of… good faith."

"Good faith, a rare commodity in these trying times." She nodded and took her seat.

"Too true." He sighed dramatically and shook his head, the ends of his mustache swayed. His relief at her cooperation was evident. "Is that why you agreed to do this for your brother? As a sign of good faith? From what I have heard the Azula of the House of Agni I knew no longer exists. I would be terribly disappointed to discover that the rumors are true."

"Hardly." She snorted and drank the scalding tea. "Zuko expected me to come because of his empty promises. I agreed to come because I thought someone would give me a better offer."

"What did he offer you, if I may inquire?" He attacked.

"Ba Sing Se, of course." She parried.

"I see." He said, keeping his eyes trained on his cup. If he had recognized her bluff he showed no indication of it. "So you are not obedient to Fire Lord Zuko."

"Never." She swallowed more unremarkable tea. "I was born with greatness. Zuko is one of those unfortunate fools who had greatness thrust upon him, and now he does not know what to do with it." Azula offered as an explanation.

"Indeed. So you are looking to reclaim your throne."

"I'm not going to deny it. I hear that _you_ have been doing well in that respect. Am I to believe that you took control of the city from under the liberator's noses?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Your father's airship fleet managed to destroy over a quarter of the Earth Kingdom's crops. The liberators had a revolt on their hands before they could stabilize the entire country. They came forward to bravely serve their people for a time and then returned to their daily lives. I owe my success to the overwhelming support of my faithful supporters. I single-handedly stabilized the government and then there was no need for the White Lotus to remain here." He shrugged slightly.

Azula frowned. "But that won't last with my brother ruling the Fire Nation."

"Not while your brother reigns, no." He agreed with her. "He has already established that he intends to be an impediment to my administration. Do you know what your brother has done while you were away?"

"Plenty to ruin my country, I would imagine." She diligently examined her nails.

"He officially ended the Dynasty of Sozin." Long Feng informed her bluntly.

"So he's trying to erase the shameful victories and failures of our heritage? You don't say." Azula wasn't surprised in the least.

Long Feng shook his head. "I don't believe that was his purpose. Any members of the former dynasty no longer have a claim to the throne. It is part of his effort to usher in a new era, Sozin did the same. No one has disputed his decision thus far, and that was months ago."

"In other words, the only one he's cheating out of the throne… is me." She said lifelessly as the new information set in. They both fell silent. Azula stared blankly ahead, clutching her cup for temporary warmth.

"Are you familiar with the tale of Queen Lien?" He queried, pouring more tea into his full cup.

"Of course." Azula had dutifully committed all her history lessons to memory. "She was the granddaughter of Agni himself." She recalled, wondering why he was so eager to change the subject.

"And do you remember the circumstances surrounding her rise to power?"

Azula rolled her eyes. "She was made to marry one of her brothers who cast her out into the desert so he could be the sole ruler of the Fire Nation. For months she survived on her own and after she saw the entirety of the empty, unpopulated landscape she saw no reason why it shouldn't be hers, so she named herself the Queen. She married a merchant prince, bore the son of the King of what is now Omashu, invited airbenders to study at the grand scholarly centers she built and essentially created her own empire." Azula recited, carefully tapping her nails against the table. "The Fire Lord never tried to retrieve his territory, the risk was too great. The provinces were unified once more nearly a millennium later. So what is your point?"

"Lien made valuable allies and bloodlessly built up an empire. It is said that a greater empress never lived." He said, looking ominous.

"We may hail from the same majestic house but I am no Lien." Azula said sternly, catching onto his angle. "Besides, I have no allies and I'm _not_ bearing you a son." Her features betrayed no emotion.

"No." He chuckled sinisterly. "That will not be necessary. But I believe we can create a similar network that our foes would not dare undermine." His eyes gleamed with a sort of perverse excitement.

"All that remains of her empire are abandoned ruins and sunken ships." She said evenly.

"Even so, this is a better offer than any your brother will ever put forward to you. He would allow you to wear your crown of course, you're still technically royalty, but you will never be able to _rule_."

Azula knew Long Feng had backed her into a corner. Long Feng knew Azula would never abandon her birthright, and he was using it to gain her support.

"And what are you planning to do, may I ask?" She was plainly trying to sound disinterested.

Azula knew immediately that she had opened the flood gates when Long Feng leaned across the table to speak more intently. "With your consent, I would free your father. All you would have to do is pull the wool over the eyes of the bureaucrats in Caldera Crater and make sure no one gets suspicious. I would have one of my people meet with you secretly every week and keep you informed."

"Ozai is in a maximum security vault. Even the Dai Li would have trouble freeing him." She told him, unsure of what else to say.

"Allow me to worry about that Princess. I am simply asking you to return to your palace and convince everyone that I am not a pressing threat. Draw attention away from Ozai on the night I release him, pose a distraction- I'm sure it shouldn't be an issue for you." His thin lips warped into a knowing grin. "Afterwards we will raise a mighty host to attack Azulon."

"You devoted all your efforts to keeping Ba Sing Se free from the Fire Nation for many years, but now you wish to ally yourself with us?" Long Feng gazed back at her smug expression and unbreakable glare.

"Interests change." He responded nonchalantly. "I am finding it increasingly intolerable to cooperate with one who distrusts me so." All of his words seemed to have a dual meaning.

"Has it crossed your mind that schemes such as this one are specifically why Zuko does not appreciate your high position?" She asked reasonably with a hint of ridicule.

He waved her comment aside. "Ruling beside your father would be more favorable, nevertheless. Ba Sing Se would run more smoothly and I wouldn't have to deal with the daily adversity from Omashu and the Fire Nation."

"I am hesitant to agree. I made a deal with you before, and you tried to double cross me."

"Unsuccessfully." He added, as if it would change her mind.

"Yes, but you still tried." Azula was not eager to have anyone betray her ever again.

"Perhaps you forget, you cannot rule unless your brother is out of the way and Ozai cannot reclaim the Fire Nation without your help. Doesn't the risk seem worth it? The balance of power hinges on you, Princess Azula. Your brother may have offered you Ba Sing Se, but I would give you the Fire Nation."

**A/N: Okay, what do you think is going to happen next? **

**And by the way, Caldera Crater is the volcano the nobility live in on Capital Island (I didn't make that up). **

**You get an A+ in ancient history if you can name the historical figure I based the legendary Queen Lien on!**


	6. Deception

Chapter VI: Deception

**Oh well, everyone failed ancient history. It was Cleopatra! Now that we have that random bit of world-building/plot-building out of the way, onward!**

_Never attempt to win by force what can be done in deception. _

Machiavelli:_The Prince_

The heavy cell door crashed as it hit the wall behind it. "Come on peasant, let's go." Azula was merely an outline in the dimly lit cellar. Sokka straightened up.

"You came back?" He asked in astonishment but Azula had already disappeared from the doorway. He followed her reluctantly, stepping on a ring of keys and a pool of blood on his way out.

"Don't worry; I just knocked him out with one of his own rocks. I'll show these bastards how to earthbend…" Her voice was shrinking as she moved farther away from him. She was walking vigorously, but not running.

"What happened to you?" He asked, keeping close by her side.

"I've gotten enough information to satisfy Zuko's questions. And I was looking for you, idiot. I told you to follow me. I couldn't have gone back to the palace and said 'Sorry, I lost him, he was just too damn stupid to follow my orders."

"Well I'll never be smart enough to follow your orders." He said forebodingly.

Azula couldn't help but grin. "Well, that either makes you especially stupid or extremely smart." She said dryly. "Let's get out of here. I've spent far too much time indoors lately."

* * *

><p>The three hour walk back to their war balloon left them both worse for wear. Firstly, it had sprinkled. It was just a light drizzle, but Sokka couldn't resist teasing Azula for looking panicked. Azula shoved Sokka into a ravine, Sokka threw several generous handfuls of mud at Azula, Azula shocked him, Sokka shoved her back, and the process was repeated all over again.<p>

Sokka spent most of the time sitting with the pilot of the relatively small airship, learning everything he could about keeping one in the air instead of taking it down. Azula simply stood on the outside deck, clutching the thin metal railing.

She was going to cooperate with Long Feng, but she was not happy about it. Nevertheless, it was her best chance of regaining her empire at the moment. The entire plan seemed unnecessarily messy. Releasing her father seemed like more of a complication than a benefit. Under this new scheme, Ozai would have to abandon the idea of being Phoenix King altogether, and Azula was not certain that he would. She had a bad feeling Long Feng didn't consider Ozai to be a formidable threat anymore because he was deprived of his bending ability. She knew better.

Ozai had allies and people who were still loyal to him, but the same could not be said for her. She knew from experience that she couldn't trust the loyalists. She knew she couldn't trust the fickle Dai Li agents. She didn't _want_ to trust her brother. She was almost positive however, that she would be happily accepted by her father when he learned of her involvement in his release. The whole thing seemed like a particularly ludicrous gambit in a professional game of Pai Sho.

Sokka poked his head outside to check on her as they were approaching the city. She stood like an imposing black pillar on the pink and orange vista of the dawn. Her short hair blew in the currents of the wind. Sokka hadn't quite gotten used to seeing her with her hair down. He shook his head and went back into the cockpit to learn how to properly land the airship.

* * *

><p>It had been a rough landing. The adventurous pilot had allowed Sokka to bring it to the ground by himself. Azula had been both frazzled and infuriated, but when she brought her hand up to slap him he caught her wrist mid-stroke. Sokka was surprised, but not as much as Azula. Her lips formed a perfectly scandalized "o" as his grip tightened. "I saved your life, but that does not mean I am incapable of taking it. I would <em>gladly<em> accept your death as reparation." She broke away from him and strode toward the palace, glaring.

"You could have killed me at anytime over the past 24 hours. You could have killed me and left." He ran to catch up; four soldiers had fallen in beside her already to escort her through the palace.

"Thank you for reminding me of what I was already painfully aware of, but I _told_ you…"

"You told me that you would have to take me back to the palace. Ba Sing Se is a big city. You could have hidden- or run. You never had a concrete reason as to why _you_ had to return to the palace at all."

"Where else could I possibly go? If you have an alternative then please, let me know."

"I think you've changed. You just don't want to admit it." He said seriously.

"Changed? It's impossible for me to change. Besides, precious Zuko owes me now, and I intend to collect."

* * *

><p>"From what I gathered it was not Long Feng who drove liberators out of Ba Sing Se, it was the common people who supported him. Once a government was reestablished there was no reason for the liberators to stick around." Azula sat in the War Room, fiddling with the figurines on one of the detailed tactical maps she was familiar with. Her brother paced in front of her.<p>

"But you saw no army." Zuko asked uneasily.

"Not unless he hid them in the Tea Shrine." She poked suspiciously at the display of meticulously arranged blood oranges on the table. Fear of poison was one of her most prevalent neuroses.

"This isn't funny."

"Then stop being so foolish. For the time Long Feng seems to be content to rule his city. Maybe you should just accept that he isn't out to get you. He hates me of course, but even I can agree with his logic. I would be pissed if someone stole my kingdom from me."

Zuko glanced at her warily. Technically he had done no such thing, but the implication was there. Azula told him that she had stayed out of sight; she had just been the first to escape. Zuko had accepted the plausible lie. Metal bars were usually not an impediment to Azula. The refined earth was both a strength and a weakness to the Earth Kingdom in that respect.

"I don't understand… everything was fine in the first few weeks after the comet. Then he started refusing the terms of every treaty we threw at him."

Azula cringed at the mention of the comet. "There are plenty of wealthy people in the Upper Ring that prospered under his old regime. He doubtlessly made some influential allies that helped him. Make no mistake, even though Long Feng has moved his operation into the royal palace the city is still liberated. He'll have to restore order to the city before he makes a move anywhere else. That impressive hole Uncle blasted through the Tea Shrine has yet to be repaired. What happened to him anyway?"

Zuko took a long pause and looked away from her.

"Ah, so he's dead." Azula answered her own question, trying to not sound gleeful.

"No- he's alive. He's living in a Tea Shop in Ba Sing Se but he's under constant surveillance."

"I see." She dug her nails into one of the wooden figurines. "Is that all you want from me?"

"If I need you for anything else you'll know." Zuko said, glaring at her with his bad eye.

"What of my repayment?" She asked, standing at her full height.

Zuko looked around before saying: "You get to live in the palace again, and you get a second chance. That should be sufficient. I am grateful, but I am not indebted to you."

"It seems you are no more trustworthy than I am, Zuzu." Azula smiled skeptically.

"I will never sink to your level Azula. That would take a great amount of lying." He overlooked her slight on his character. "By the way," he began, smoothly changing the subject. "Katara is coming."

"Okay." Azula said emotionlessly.

"I reserve the right to imprison you at any moment, you know that, right?" He asked flatly.

"Whatever. Speaking of people I hate, how is Mai?" She said casually.

Zuko seemed suspicious, but he entertained her inquiry. "I can't contain her here. Now that the war is over there is no reason for her not to set out and do whatever she wants."

"Ha. Typical."

"I know, that's Mai for you." Zuko sighed.

"Actually I was referring to your inability to control women. I could never understand why she was so attached to you- I thought she was better than that. I guess I can see why now. You're completely submissive."

The fire in a nearby brazier blazed orange. "Why do you feel the need to constantly remind me that I show you more mercy than you deserve?"

"Maybe I am afraid of what will happen if you forget." She paused, watching Zuko's expression become gradually more confused. "In reality, I'm trying to annoy you. Is it working?"

"Leave." He growled, ascending to his place of honor on the platform.

"Success." She said under her breath. She knew her brother couldn't have heard her with his one good ear at this distance. She decided to take a chance on one of the orange slices on the table.

What disturbed Zuko was not that she was lying and mocking him again, it was that she had almost seemed borderline apologetic. Once she had left, Zuko called the Commander of his Palace Guard to his side. "Alert the castle." Zuko ordered him, collapsing into a chair. "And if you see my sister, cover your ears and run screaming in the opposite direction."

* * *

><p>Azula had broken a pipe. It was easy enough, she just loosened a few bolts, brought the hard heel of her boot down on the metal tube a few times and voila. Instant distraction, just add water.<p>

If she had started a fire in the kitchens or caused an explosion it wouldn't have had the same effect. A stray fire could be swiftly taken care of, but in the case of broken plumbing, firebenders were useless.

Her contact had a distinct limp with plenty of deep scars covering his face. He may have been handsome once, but Azula could not say for certain. "Long Feng sends his thanks." He informed her huskily. "And this. It was recovered from Wulong Forest."

He held out a handkerchief to her that she accepted tentatively from his calloused palm. The cloth fell open to reveal a massive glinting ring. She recognized the finely crafted gold with the stylized rising sun engraved onto the surface. She cradled it delicately in her hand.

"It is meant to be a sign of…"

"Good faith." Azula finished his sentence and slipped the ring onto her finger.

**A/N: Sorry this is short and somewhat transition-y.**

**Constructive criticism appreciated! **


	7. Of Moons, Birds, and Monsters

**A/N: Chapter title taken from an MGMT song. **

**We get some excitement in this chapter and some sentimentality. **

Chapter VII Of Moons, Birds, and Monsters

_For never woman born of man and maid_

_Had wrought such havoc on the earth as I,_

_Or troubled the heavens with a sea of flame_

_That climbed to touch the silent whirling stars_

Sara Teasdale _Helen __of __Troy_

Azula's days started simply enough. She forced herself to get out of bed while the morning sun was still shining for the first time in ages.

When she first discovered that Zuko left her room entirely untouched, she had been both pleasantly surprised and irritated. Her room was a wreck. She had stepped on a shard of mirror as soon as she entered and nearly sliced her foot open from toe to toe. The laceration was relatively shallow, but it bled and it was impossible to avoid staining the antique hand-woven carpet. She had wrapped it in a torn linen sheet with some poultice she had found in her now mirror-less vanity.

A week passed since she had returned from Ba Sing Se and she still hadn't done anything about it. There was now a trail of bloody footprints on her carpet as well as a smattering of glinting mirror pieces that still laid about in one part of the room. The walls were scorched, the bedding was falling off and the hangings weren't hanging quite right.

The locks of hair were the worst part. Azula felt drained when she looked in that direction, but her ever-present anxiety always made it difficult to sleep. She left her windows open one day. When she returned the strands had been swept away by the ocean winds.

Zuko had barred housekeeping from her wing of the palace, and appeared to have warned everyone else away from her as well.

True, she was accustomed to having people stay out of her way, but never like this. Courtiers and servants alike avoided her and fled from her presence. She had seen people dodge down other corridors or turn rapidly in the other direction as though they had forgotten something. As a result, she rarely saw anyone.

She would practice her katas in the Agni Kai Arena daily and circumvent the Coronation Plaza at all cost. She was never permitted to actually use fire; supposedly the Yu Yan had orders to shoot at will. Azula planned to behave, considering Zuko threatened to doom her to the same fate as their father. She saw holes in palace security and contemplated telling Zuko just to prove how _trustworthy_ she was, but she thought better of it. She spent the rest of her free time correcting the outdated misconceptions of ancient war ministers (who were all called "Foreign Affairs Officials" now.) When Zuko was not dragging her around to meetings with his advisors and various petitioning groups (apparently all his friends had left. "They're still close by," He had assured her, "I'm just keeping you _closer_.") the Royal Gallery was usually a safe place for her to loiter. Everyone had seen the art there multiple times, and new pieces were almost never added. She could count on steering clear of disrespectful glances and judgmental whispers there.

Every once in a while, however, she could count on running into something unexpected.

Katara was gazing curiously at simple framed sketch in the foyer. She approached her silently. It was a portrait Azula was familiar with.

Azula stood with her hand clasped onto Zuko's shoulder. She looked younger but no less severe with the proud tilt of her nose and her characteristic amused pout- as if she saw something ironic that everyone else was blind to. Zuko, on the other hand, looked as though he was trying to remain stoic while the pressure of her grip bit into the skin of her shoulder.

"_Lovely_ family, aren't we?" Azula remarked. In a split second Katara spun around and her fist collided with Azula's face with a horrific crunch.

Azula stumbled backward and let out a short, deep gasp. She covered her mouth with her hand as blood spurted from her nose and cascaded over her fingers. "What the hell was that?" Azula screeched as best she could.

Katara had quickly moved backwards but now seemed incapable of moving under Azula's murderous gaze. It brought back too many memories she would sooner forget. "It was a reflex." Katara said meekly, shrinking away even farther.

"Your refleth broke my noth!" Azula's voice was terribly garbled, but Katara was too shocked to find it comical. She spat blood at Katara's feet.

For some reason Katara thought it would be easier to face Azula now that she had defeated her. Katara tried to stutter out an apology, and explanation, anything to stop Azula from looking so homicidal.

"You bith." Azula grated out slowly.

Katara bolted and prayed Azula wouldn't follow, but of course she did. She was regrettably without her water skin; she had wrongly assumed she would be safe in the Fire Nation Royal Palace for once. Zuko warned her, but she had not counted on stumbling upon his psychotic sister right away. As soon as she had made it safely behind a locked door in the next wing of the building she heard Azula ram against the gold-inlaid metal. She braced herself against it and frantically searched the room, strands of dark hair had fallen over her eyes and she was gasping for air.

Azula was cursing and trying to break it down. Katara spotted a basin full of water just as the attack ceased. She seized the liquid from its container and held her ground as she heard the clatter of metal hinges falling to the floor. The barrier between them was flung away and Katara barely had time to think before she created a long blast of ice that stuck Azula to the opposite wall.

The gallery wing was silent. Katara took off in the opposite direction, searching for reinforcements of any kind, but a damp Azula violently cut her off by snatching her hair. Azula dragged her, teeth bared, to the next wing with a death grip on her hair and threw her in front of Zuko. Katara involuntarily brought her hand up to protect her raw scalp.

"You're crazy!" Katara whispered in stark realization.

The guards were ready to intervene but Zuko held them back.

"Your thlut broke my noth!" Azula yelled, pinching her nose to stop the stream of blood. She was a gruesome sight; blood was smeared across the lower half of her face like finger-paint.

Zuko tried very hard to keep a straight face before saying: "You probably deserved it."

"_Probably?_" Katara said indignantly, brushing off her shoulder.

Azula seemed to have gotten the bleeding under control. "I wasn't asking you to take my side. I just wanted to let you know just how much trouble I'm going to cause _because_ she did it. I'm going to the High Council; this certainly won't facilitate any peace talks."

"Azula…" Zuko began with a loud exhale.

"Look, _you_startled _me_! But I can fix your nose." Katara said reasonably.

"No." Azula refused right away. "I'm not letting you touch me. I insist on seeing the royal surgeon. And if you fucked up my face little girl I'm coming for yours." Azula pinched Katara's nose between her red-stained fingers before Katara fiercely knocked her arm away. Azula sauntered out of the hall.

"Don't worry about it Katara, there's really nothing she can do." Zuko said in an attempt to console her.

"Nothing she can do?" Katara cried out. "She has no shame and she clearly doesn't regret anything she's done! Zuko, she needs to be locked up!"

"I know." He said gravely. "But the World Court isn't organized enough to give her a trial at the moment. And she's perfectly lucid."

"Isn't there something else you can put her in prison for? Like I don't know- eating babies?"

"Unfortunately there is no substantial proof that my sister eats babies" Zuko replied in a deadpan tone.

"How do you know she's not planning something? What are you going to do with her a week from now or a month or a year?"

"I was planning on leaving it up to fate for now but I really have no idea." He groaned, sitting down on one of the steps. "Do you?" He asked her pitifully in humble hope.

"Not a clue." Katara admitted, lowering herself onto the step as well. "All I can think about is her reaction when I chained her down. Why would she ever want to come back here and why would she ever want to stay?"

"No other country would grant her asylum, but there's is nothing for her here either. I've been watching her closely but so far…" Zuko shook his head in place of words.

No one had forgotten the river of fire and the proceeding lightning storm their Agni Kai had created in the sky on the day of Sozin's Comet.

"Are you scared of her?" Katara asked quietly.

"Are you?" He responded a little too quickly.

"I don't think I'll ever see anyone lose control as spectacularly as Azula did ever again. I think I stopped being scared of her and then I was just scared _for_ her." Katara wrapped her arms around her knees.

"If there's one thing I know about my sister it's that she's a liar. She's so good, in fact, that it's easy to forget she is one." Zuko said darkly. "But I need to keep her here anyway. She's been occasionally helpful so far, but I worry. She's different now- she was possessed in a way by our father and I guess she doesn't know what to do with herself."

"Oh Zuko… you shouldn't be worried for her…" Katara patted his leg awkwardly but quickly withdrew it when she noticed that flecks of blood still spotted her hand.

"You're right. I should worry about what she's going to do to me." Zuko smiled in black humor. "Everything is unstable and we have a lot to be afraid of- but somehow I feel like no matter what I try to do, Azula is always going to be in the way. It always leads back to her. It's well within her ability to destroy everything orderly and good in this world. What is keeping her from doing so, I hardly know."

* * *

><p>Azula was locked into her room that night as per usual. She hadn't changed a thing about her living quarters since she had returned. She rested on an unmade bed and evaded puddles of spilt cosmetics in her bathroom. She had been shaking badly on her coronation day. The little pots of powder and cream had been knocked over in her last successful effort to maintain perfection.<p>

Zuko had not taken another moment out of his busy day to summon her and she was still considering approaching the High Council. She had no reason to believe that they would address the grievances of a half-mad dishonored Princess of a former dynasty anyway. Cold dread pooled in her stomach like ice. Was this truly her reality now? She was living in a stalemate with her remaining family members, involuntarily making herself comfortable in captivity like a dangerous animal in the royal menagerie to be gawked at by the courtiers. She shivered slightly and reminded herself that it was only temporary.

Her father's ring sat heavily on her thumb. She twisted around idly. It was a gaudy old royal heirloom, inset with rubies, onyx, and yellow diamonds. What was the point of wearing it if it only fit on her thumb? She knew why she did, though. That ring was her past. It was her birthright; it was her agony and her glory, and her last hope for her future. She resolved to leave it on for now.

She spotted the large shard of mirror she had cut herself on previously. It had a corner that was still edged with her blood. Azula gingerly picked it up and cleaned it with her black silk sleeve. She studied it for a moment before a thought occurred to her. She placed the shard in the leftmost corner of the empty mirror frame, where it fit perfectly. Her half-smile reflected in the faint torch light.

* * *

><p><strong>Like I said, I always imagined Azula's path to some semblance of redemption to be more painful than others. <strong>

**A: ****Sorry****about****Azula****'****s****temporary****lisp.****If****you****couldn****'****t****understand****her****that****'****s****fine,****it****'****s****not****important****and****it****wasn****'****t****nice.**

**B: ****Yes,****I****have****created****a****War****Crimes****court****in****post-SC****ATLA****world.****Also****not****important****for****the****moment.**

**C: ****After****the****next****chapter****this****is****going****to****get****angsty.****So****enjoy****the****(quasi)****cheerfulness****while****you****can.****Lots****more****blood****and****anxiety****are****coming.**

**p.s. are my epigrams at the beginning too pretentious? Haha I think they're pretty appropriate but I have a really weird one coming up that's like 3 paragraphs long. Do you just ignore them? I promise I won't be offended if you say yes!**

**I ****worked **_**really **_**hard ****on ****this ****one ****and ****I****'****m ****sorry ****to ****report ****that ****my ****rate ****of ****posting ****has ****surpassed ****my ****rate ****of ****production. ****I ****need ****some ****major ****inspiration ****for ****the ****part ****I****'****m ****on ****so ****all ****comments ****and ****questions ****are ****valuable.**


	8. Ashes, Ashes

**A/N: A treat for you! Super long, but savor it because I haven't made any progress in 2 weeks.**

**The point of that little Incident in the last chapter was to show that Azula is not 100% invincible, especially after everything she's gone through and she does, in fact, bleed red just like everyone else. She's trapped until she figures out where she goes from here, she's trapped until she puts the pieces back together (motif!) **

**I also realized everyone is a little more eloquent than they would be on the show, and I guess that means everyone is out of character a bit, I hope you can overlook it.**

**There's a shout-out to Jet (revived again, if you squint and turn your head sideways) at the end (he made an appearance before too, I forgot to mention) **

Chapter VIII Ashes, Ashes (also, "In Which We Learn Some Unexpected Things About Azula) (and, "There Will Be Blood")

"I begin to think," said Estella, in a musing way, after another moment of calm wonder, "that I almost understand how this comes about. If you had brought up your adopted daughter wholly in the dark confinement of these rooms, and had never let her know that there was such a thing as the daylight by which she has never once seen your face—if you had done that, and then, for a purpose, had wanted her to understand the daylight and know all about it, you would have been disappointed and angry? . . ."  
>"Or," said Estella, "—which is a nearer case—if you had taught her, from the dawn of her intelligence, with your utmost energy and might, that there was such a thing as daylight, but that it was made to be her enemy and destroyer, and she must always turn against it, for it had blighted you and would else blight her—if you had done this, and then, for a purpose, had wanted her to take naturally to the daylight and she could not do it, you would have been disappointed and angry? . . ."<br>"So," said Estella, "I must be taken as I have been made. The success is not mine, the failure is not mine, but the two together make me."

Charles Dickens, "_Great __Expectations_"

* * *

><p>Azula met Sokka on her way to inconspicuously glean a couple of buns from the kitchens. Preparing her own food made her feel more secure these days, she didn't want to take any chances with the corruptible wait staff. She was traveling unnoticed through the basement when Sokka slid out from underneath the pipe she had broken earlier that month and shouted "<em>Azula?<em>" In a pleasantly shocked tone that irritated her endlessly.

"That's 'Princess' or 'your grace' to you." She said scornfully, thankful that no one was around.

"Katara really did a number on your face, huh? I heard it was bad but… damn." He brushed the dust off his rough spun blue clothing as he stood up to get a better look. Azula's hand instinctively covered the vast yellowing bruise from his intent gaze and fought back the blush she felt rising in her cheeks. The palace surgeon had made quick work of it, but without the aid of a healer the bruises would not fade quickly.

"It was worse a few days ago." She insisted, glowering at him.

"I'm sorry, but if it comes down to it, even I won't be able to save you from Katara's wrath." His eyes were sparkling with unreleased laughter. Azula trained her own on the infuriating smudge of soot highlighting his jaw line.

"Are you here to revel in my pain, whelp?" She spat, finally uncovering her discolored nose.

"No, just mending this broken pipe. You firebenders really are useless." He waved a wrench at her.

"So you're Zuzu's janitor now." She stated, crossing her arms.

"Yes that's me." He said solemnly. "Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe: war hero, peacekeeper, Mr. Fix-it."

"You had better get back to work; you seem like a busy man." She had every intention of leaving him behind. She had a meeting that evening that she could not avoid.

"You really think I'm going to let you walk around unsupervised? Where is your security detail?"

"Lunch break." She sighed.

"That was weak." Sokka put his hands on his hips.

"I know." She said condescendingly, turning back to her path.

"Where are you going now?"

"Lunch break." She shrugged, Sokka following her like a lost puppy all the while. She hastily veered off into the bakery. There were always people running about the kitchen preparing some kind of food. Azula riffled through a pantry shelf, searching for fire gummies or anything else that didn't seem completely repulsive. She felt nauseous when she saw the sausage Sokka was gnawing on.

She stood on her toes and lifted a bowl off the top shelf. She gazed down at its contents, holding the wide bowl between her arms like a child.

"Cherries?" Sokka wondered absently.

She put them down on marble counter-top and carefully selected one from the masses. "Do you know why I am particularly partial to cherries?" She asked as though she had gone somewhere far away.

"Okay. I'll bite. _Why_?" Sokka said derisively through a mouthful of komodo-rhino.

"Because they're like little living hearts that bleed when you bite through their skin." She smiled crookedly to herself and punctured the cherry with a nail to demonstrate her point. Droplets of dark red juice ran down her fingers and pooled in her palm.

"That's sick." Sokka swallowed with some difficulty.

"That's life." She rejoined. "Have these pitted and brought up to my room." She barked at one of the kitchen girls, crushing the remainder of the small fruit and dropping it on the floor.

Azula left before she heard the girl stutter a soft "Yes your grace." Sokka touched the pommel of his dagger for reassurance before he reached out for her so she couldn't vanish down another passage of the labyrinth. "Hold on just a moment. Where do you think you're going?" She ripped her arm away from his touch.

"I'm going to plot your murder you insufferable flea." She said menacingly. Sometimes it felt good to tell people what they expected to hear, to confirm what people suspected of her. "Leave me alone, you wouldn't want to spoil the surprise." She nearly kicked open a small door that concealed a short flight of serpentine steps. He was giving her an unbearable headache. "Why are you here anyway? Don't you have a tribe and a girlfriend to look after? Pretty little thing as I recall…"

"Suki doesn't need looking after." He replied amiably enough. The barb appeared to have failed. "She isn't too happy about being subject to Long Feng again but she can take care of herself. And your brother named me temporary Minister of Foreign Policy, its fairly demanding."

Azula frowned in confusion. "Did he create that position so he could keep you by his side? Is he paying you generously?" Under her father there had been no such title.

"Mostly I just work with Aang on peacekeeping, economic, and cultural issues."

"Agni save us all." She said under her breath, clinging to the rusted railing as she rose higher.

"From you?" Sokka grumbled, refusing to take his eyes off her even in the dark. "In my opinion Zuko is giving you far too much freedom. It's because he wants you to prove that you're not a completely mad psychopath. He wants you to give him some reason to hope that you can be fixed."

Azula was displeased; she had not asked for his opinion and was not accustomed to people forcing theirs on her. "What can I say? Devotion is torture; it's been drilled into him for so long it's almost as if he has no choice. If you had a position of any real importance perhaps someone would listen to you."

"Aang agrees with him, and so does the General. He thinks you're a 'ruthless enemy and a worthy opponent' and if we show you mercy and humanity it will somehow work to our advantage and help 'restore the honor of the Fire Nation'." Sokka told her scathingly. "It's kinda hard to argue with them. And what do you mean by devotion?" He frowned.

"Isn't it obvious? Zuko bears some sort of perverse love for me; you can see it in his eyes," Azula said, sounding girlish and threatening concurrently. "Not by any conventional definition of course, I'm just the unfinished project that he can't let go of. But I know not to mourn for what can't be mended- you think he would have realized that by now." Azula coughed, the little-used passage must have been filled with dust. "What's your opinion on _that_, peasant?"

"I think some people are destructive and toxic and will just keep hurting you over and over again. You can constantly wish that they'll change, but they never will." He was uncharacteristically serious all of a sudden. Azula was briefly unsettled. "Sausage?" He added on a lighter note as the exit creaked open.

Azula scrunched up her nose. "I'm a vegetarian." She informed him disdainfully.

* * *

><p>Azula had the unfortunate ability of showing up in places she was not wanted. As a child she had used this to her advantage. She had hidden and listened, but now she rarely had that luxury. The staircase from the basement led to the inside of the Coronation Temple. Most of the torches were lit and the obsidian ornamentations were sparkling in the orange glow.<p>

Zuko's eyes widened when he spotted her, and his three companions whirled around to stare at them.

"Hey guys!" Sokka said cheerily, pushing past the princess eagerly.

"I thought I saw you coming Snoozles." Toph said. The avatar and his girlfriend were holding hands and standing by the others. Azula noted grimly that he had grown much taller than her.

"I found this one wandering around unsupervised downstairs." Sokka gestured toward Azula.

"For the last time, I told you…" Azula began through clenched teeth.

"You were getting lunch? Yeah that's what they all say." Sokka rolled his eyes.

"Should've known we would find you in the kitchens." Katara said wryly.

"_Actually_, I was fixing the broken pipe down there." He said, crossing his arms.

"If only Ozai had diverted more of his attention to the palace and less to war, maybe this place wouldn't be such a wreck now." Zuko sighed, glancing at his sister. "That's the fourth thing that's happened this month. Just last week a chandelier fell and nearly killed someone."

"Then there was that near cave-in down in the Dragonbone archives." Aang added.

Azula twisted the golden ring around her thumb. She was going to have to make her diversions a little less noticeable. It was hard enough trying to conceal her rendezvous with Long Feng's people without trying to hide the fact that she was guilty of vandalism in her own palace. Luckily, no one seemed to have reminded Zuko that Ozai had always kept the palace in impeccable condition. Realistically there should be no reason for everything to be falling apart at the same time.

"I was just showing everyone the inside of this place." Zuko explained. It was one of the more beautiful architectural and artistic features on the palace grounds, but was seldom ever used. The tombs of their ancestors lay beneath and above in crypts. Their father's was already there. It was a giant mighty statue that stood near the center of the sarcophagi. He wanted to ensure he would be remembered as he wanted to be. Ozai was nothing if not prepared.

Azula leaned against one of the hundreds of chairs while Zuko and his friends blissfully ignored her. These late night meetings were both exhausting her and wearing on her nerves. The scarred boy that had first met with her had not reappeared. Instead she was met by a brainless Joo Dee, an incognito Dai Li agent and a man who looked suspiciously like a pirate. None of them had brought any news of great importance, and Azula was not a patient woman.

Zuko's echoing voice was exacerbating her headache, he was prating on about the history of the temple and how it had been built with acoustics to house the ancient Royal Choir.

"I wish I could have heard them." Aang said wistfully, gawking at the magnificent frescoes.

"I can sing if you'd like!" Sokka proclaimed, inhaling deeply.

"Spare us Snoozles." Toph deadpanned, clapping a hand over his mouth before he could endeavor to perform what would doubtlessly be a stirring operatic feat.

Zuko turned to look at his sister. "Azula can sing." He said in realization.

Azula, who had been casually leaning against a chair at the opposite end of the hall, looked up. Katara and Aang also turned to look at her in surprise. "Oh please." She said over her shoulder, trying to cover up her discomfort with nonchalance. "When have I ever been able to sing?"

"When we were little you sang all the time." Zuko insisted. "Father used to listen to you but I remember you sang to yourself when you thought no one was listening."

"I have never taken a singing lesson in my life!" Azula said indignantly. "I don't really care for that sort of thing." She could tell where this was going.

"Sing something for us!" Aang persisted, spinning toward her on an air bubble.

There it was.

"I can't." Azula said, nearing desperation.

"Why not?" Katara asked expectantly, crossing her arms.

"I don't know any songs." She told them, shrugging.

"You really expect us to believe that you haven't learned one song in your entire life?" Zuko raised his eyebrow.

"Wonder why I never had the time… you'd think I was running a country or something." Azula rolled her eyes. "Pursuing the arts was never really an option."

"You could make one up." Sokka suggested, rather unhelpfully.

"Despite what you may think, my talent is not so great that I can simply summon the ability to write an opera on a whim." She said slowly, moving to slouch against a black pillar.

"Fine, be that way." Katara pursed her lips haughtily and turned her attention away from the princess. Azula wanted to collapse into hysterical laughter. If her captivity consisted of idealists cajoling her into performing musical numbers, she feared she truly would go mad.

* * *

><p>"Tomorrow night." The crippled boy told her as he plucked a stem of wheat grass from a flower box on the juliet balcony. "You think you can keep them occupied?" He asked, perching the strand of grass between his teeth.<p>

"Does Long Feng doubt me?" She said in a hushed tone. It had taken her ages to get rid of Zuko's entourage of misfits. Earlier, she had been wheedled into suffering through an uncomfortable dinner (for her at least). She had brooded through the entire thing and sipped Ceylon tea as the group of friends giggled. Azula thought she would suffocate before they allowed her to travel to her quarters.

"Never, Princess. He just wants to make sure you remember your role in this." He said gruffly.

"The only time I will forget is when he fulfills his end of the bargain." She muttered severely, wary of lurkers. This balcony off of the second story had not been the wisest place to meet. At least the moon was illuminating the garden below.

Her informant nodded. "Wait for a messenger hawk. Someone will retrieve you as soon as possible."

"I should hope so." She had no faith in the self-proclaimed leader of Ba Sing Se. He needed her father's connections to dethrone Zuko and shorten his rise to ultimate power, but Azula planned to indispose Long Feng before that came to pass. "You are dismissed." She gestured to the garden casually and turned away from him.  
>Despite the sickeningly unnatural curve of his spine, the boy was able to climb down the balcony undetected. She closed the lattice doors as soon as he had vanished, breathing an unexpected sigh of relief.<p>

"What are you doing?"

Azula spun around to face her brother with a cool smile. His hair was loose, concealing most of his grotesque scar and his good eye did not seem amused. He was alone, with no guards accompanying him. Zuko had decided that if he couldn't hold his own against his sister; he would be a pretty lousy Fire Lord.

"Suspicious of me already Zuko? I just left you 15 minutes ago, not nearly enough time for me to cause any major trouble. Don't you know I _live_ to serve the realm of Sozin?" Her tone was saturated with melodrama as she drew his attention away from the balcony. Her heart was beating quickly; she hadn't realized he had startled her at all.

"Do you honestly think I will ever stop being suspicious of you." He said flatly, clearly not expecting an answer. "With all your lies and your insanity and your…issues-" He shook his head and looked away from her, wishing she would disappear.

"So what if I'm a liar? Why is it worse than any of your faults?" She said condescendingly, shifting closer. Her hair fell in front of her face like a dark veil, the smoky scent of burning patchouli and rosewood nearly overpowered Zuko's senses. _She__even__smells__like__a__fire._ He thought listlessly. Her face looked oddly flushed in the moon-lit sunroom.

"All you've ever done is make things more difficult for me. I see at least that much hasn't changed." He said heatedly.

"The only burden you've ever had to bear is an ugly face." She said icily. "Zuko, the moping ugly bastard prince." The cruel glance she gave him told him all he needed to know. Her breath felt like sweet acid on his skin, lychee wine, he suspected. "All of us have scars Zuko. Most of us just have the decency to hide them." She hissed.

Azula had heard about people who wore their heart on their sleeve, her brother wore his pain on his face.

"I know what you're doing Azula. All you've ever done is lie at father's feet." He said in an equally cutting tone. "But he's gone and now your life is in disarray. You don't know how to deal with it, so you've stuck yourself with us. Now all your problems remain unsolved and you're _still_a disaster." He watched Azula's eyes widen like her heart had temporarily stopped. "You may have lived as _his_prisoner but you'll die as mine, and I really hope that you drive yourself crazy with rage and disappointed vengeance- if you haven't already."

"Shut up." She broke in suddenly. "I'm sick of listening to all your new self-righteous friends telling me that I'm insane, but I can live with it. And _you_ can call me a liar, you can say that I'm disturbing and that there's something wrong with me but _you_ don't get to judge me, Zuko." The Fire Lord had not been expecting to be reprimanded. He nearly jumped when she bore one of her nails in between his ribs.

"There was a time when you accepted me, and I haven't changed." She coughed after a moment, and Zuko was stunned. It was the most vulnerable thing she had seen her do in a while. "You may be my oldest enemy, but you are also my oldest friend."

"I know." He said, looking steadily into her intimidating eyes. It was almost like looking at himself. "But you're still a nuisance. I've noticed your new jewelry, and I know what it means." He looked down at her hand, which was coincidently clenched into a fist.

"How nice. You have me all figured out." She crossed her arms.

"He's gone, Azula. His followers don't even support you anymore. There's no reason for you to still be loyal to him." He told her roughly. He hoped he hadn't plucked the wrong cord. He watched the color drain out of his sister's face as her features contorted into a scowl.

"That's the thing about phoenixes, Zuzu. They always rise from the ashes."

* * *

><p>By the time Azula woke up the next morning, sun was already streaming through her windows. She had spent the day putting together the puzzle that was her mirror. It kept her calm and out of sight. She didn't think it was wise to encounter Zuko again. Agitating their stalemate at this point in the game would be ill-advised. Her guards checked on her once an hour as usual and the chattering courtiers passed beneath her window. Nevertheless her heart beat seemed to be going faster than usual today and her body temperature was slightly above normal.<p>

She ventured to different wings of the castle to make sure no one suspected anything. Zuko was about his normal duties and so was everyone else. Aang and some of the others were going out on a day trip investigating some sort of spiritual disturbance in neutral territory. She waited at the top of the messenger tower, but no bird carried a message she saw fit to intercept.

Finally the bird meant for her arrived at her window. The note it carried implored her to be in the garden at midnight and when the time came, she heeded it.

Azula sat on the lip of one of the garden's extravagant fountains and worried the fish with her fingertips. She dragged her hand through the blue lotus blossoms and lily-pads listlessly, watching her father's ring glinting in the pool of moon light.

Her contact was already late- if she managed to be patient for longer than 10 minutes it would be a miracle. Azula dressed in her classic deep red uniform for the occasion. It was looser than she had imagined it would be; captivity had obviously taken a toll on her muscle mass. Next she moved to an orange tree and crushed blossoms beneath her feet, but the fire lilies made her cough uncontrollably so she moved back to her former position. Adrenaline was failing her and she felt fatigued in spite of her excitement. It was dark, and she should have been in bed.

At last the crunch of boots on the path reached her ears.

"You've finally come for me." She intoned solemnly, standing up to face her new companion.

"Yes." He said in his familiar husky tone as he emerged from the darkness.

"I am not a woman to be kept waiting." She notified him regally.

"My master assures you that your waiting will be well rewarded." He told her. She allowed him to hobble even closer. "He says so in the letter."

Azula raised an eyebrow at him edgily and snatched the parchment from his hand. She ripped it open and scanned the lines of black script intently.

The words were meaningless and empty; they carried nothing of vague importance. She was on the verge of asking what the meaning of it was and why he was wasting her time, but he spoke first.

"He also said to say that this is where I double cross you."

Then a knife was plunged in between her ribs and she was breathlessly spinning towards darkness. The worthless note fell out of her hand as she reached out to catch something to brake her fall, but the ground rushed up to catch her first. Her black hair fanned out as her head made impact with the stones and her eyes met her attacker. He was still standing over her with that frustrating blasé expression, his signature strand of grass still caught between his teeth. Azula looked strangely detached as she languidly brought her hand up to cover the seeping hole in the center of her chest.

"And to think I half-expected you wouldn't bleed." She heard in the distance. "If only they knew what a mess you were."

The princess clenched her teeth and clutched at her clothing as he left her. Suddenly it felt like someone had blown out the moon, it flickered and faded away. A cough escaped her lungs, blood oozed through the gaps in her teeth and dribbled down her chin and just like that she was gone, the scent of lotus blossoms still lingered in the air as she withered.

**A/N: Well that's frustrating! Hate to do this to you... tehehe **

**All my reviewers are so perceptive! This is definitely an intelligent community, I'm thrilled! You guys are picking up on the important details, and believe me, they're crucial to the rest of this story. **


	9. Through the Looking Glass

Chapter IX Through the looking glass

**A/N: I AM SO SORRY I COMPLETELY FORGOT I LEFT YOU ON A CLIFFHANGER! Yeah, so a lot of this is random bits from fever dreams because, you know, everyone has prophetic dreams in literature. So yeah, just try not to take me seriously. Dreams don't have quotes because technically no one says anything, but I try to make it clear who says what.**

**I'm warning you, from here on out it gets supremely dark and angsty. **

**I write everything for a reason…so everything will be explained if you just keep reading. **

* * *

><p>Azula had always harbored a sort of fondness for commander Zhao. It was not uncommon for ambitious generals to curry favor from the Firelord through his daughter, but Azula had always liked Zhao the best. She accepted his candies and his compliments with dismissive words and an unrevealing expression. She was polite to him only when her mother enforced it, and he was polite to her only when there was no one else around. He would bend to her level and call her "your majesty"; she would cross her arms and turn her nose in the other direction.<p>

When she had just been a lesser princess of the dynasty, Azulon had offered her hand and the title of Warden of the North to any man who could conquer the Water Tribes. With the death of her grandfather and her cousin, she had not been sure if the offer still stood as Zhao pitched a surprisingly clever plan to her father. Her eyes had widened as she listened to his cunning strategy. She hadn't realized that what she had been feeling was admiration until she was informed that the fleets had left.

She had been disappointed when she learned that the mission had been unsuccessful, but she had sighed when she learned that Zhao had been killed in the ensuing chaos. What truly disturbed her was the fact that Zhao had been everything she aspired to be. Zhao had been determined, and Zhao had been cunning and persuasive and intelligent and clever, but Zhao had failed. Zhao had been promising, but he had also been flawed and it had cost him his life.

* * *

><p>Her hair was long again and blowing in the breeze that had swept her up in the noon sun. She was floating through the air and her elaborate silken skirts were twisted around her legs in a mess of scarlet and orange. Azula wasn't accustomed to dreaming, if she was, it would not have been so painfully obvious that she was wasn't currently in reality. The sky was as menacing as it had been on the day of Sozin's Comet, even though it wasn't currently present in her sky. Her father stood before her wearing his crown, studying her critically.<p>

You will only ever be who I made you to be. He said with finality.

* * *

><p>She was jarred into consciousness by water making contact with her skin. "I don't have the skills to repair this." Azula clawed at the shadowy figure in front of her and it swore.<p>

"What do you mean you don't have the skills…" Someone began indignantly.

"You have to get Aang." The girl's voice was shaking but adamant.

"Get Aang? What could he do that you-"

"I SAID GET AANG DAMN IT. DON'T ARGUE WITH ME." She said urgently. Someone was gasping loudly very close by.

A cool sensation washed over her gently, and darkness took her once more.

* * *

><p>Her feet hit the ground and she collapsed into an infinite beach.<p>

When she looked up from beneath her shade of hair tangled with mandarin flowers, her cousin was building a house in sand. Words escaped her completely. Somehow she couldn't find the strength to stand and face him.

You're having an identity crisis. He said, packing sand around his castle.

I think it's too late for that. She said absently. At first she thought she had landed in the ocean, but it turned out to be a pool of her own blood. For some reason it didn't bother her nearly as much as it should have.

He indicated the sand castle. You've been living in this elaborate fantasy world that you've constructed. He stood up and rubbed the grains of sand off his hands.

Why couldn't I live in a fairytale like all the other spoiled princesses? She asked insolently. It was her dream after all; she could be as undignified as she wished. Plus, she didn't remember inviting the spirit of the boy who used to pinch her and steal her toys into it.

He shook his head dismally, looking much older than she remembered. Not everyone gets to live in a fairytale, princess.

A red wave came and swallowed the ephemeral palace he had made, and it took her with it.

* * *

><p>Azula woke with a start to water bubbling out of her mouth and a curse. She felt as though she were drowning in ice, as she often did in nightmares. She spat the liquid in her lungs onto dark sheets in a bright room (or bright sheets in a dark room, she could not be certain.) The effort caused her a great deal of pain.<p>

"She'll never get better if she keeps this up. I've been trying to force water down her throat for hours." A frustrated girl said from somewhere in the room.

"She's a _firebender_; she doesn't readily drink water on principal!"

"That's just stupid! I didn't bring her back to life just so she could die." Azula felt her eyes closing again

"Don't talk about death here. I don't think it's wise, considering the circumstances."

"Damn it I think she's coughing up blood again…"

* * *

><p>She is wearing nothing but a floor length coat made out of coppery velvet; embroidered with gold and silver thread along the sleeves and hem. It is her only worldly possession, the only thing he allowed her. Acrid wind tossed her loose hair around her face as she surveyed the endless desert before her. She's crying but she knows none of it actually matters, she is mourning something irreversible.<p>

What is there left to do, your majesty?

Burn them. She said, letting sand flow through her fingers. Burn them all.

* * *

><p>The universe must have balance, Azula. There is an invariable ebb and flow to our world.<p>

It was the middle of the night and she was on a sailboat in the center of a completely silent sea.

For every occasion there is reciprocation. Everything is interconnected in that way, death, birth, triumph, defeat, fire and ice. You will learn soon enough if you haven't already. My death demands yours.

She frantically spun around, searching for the speaker, but there was nothing but the ship, the sea, and the lightless moon…

* * *

><p>"Did you find anything worthwhile?"<p>

"No. The only thing peculiar about her room was a half shattered mirror that looks like she's been putting it back together. I have no idea why. The witnesses at the prison have been even less helpful. One keeps blabbering on about some kind of shadow that spirited him away."

"Sounds like the work of some nasty spirits. How else would you explain someone disappearing from a locked cell?"

"Good point. How is she doing anyway?"

"Let's just say she's fine for now. She wasn't poisoned and the damage wasn't catastrophic but the internal bleeding was pretty bad. I mended the tissue while Aang channeled air into her lungs… but I have no idea if it will hold up."

"Wasn't it you that said 'Zuko and Azula will each curse each other with their last breath?'"

"She hasn't cursed you yet."

"Then believe me, Azula has not breathed her last."

* * *

><p>You were never born to rule, Azula. You were born to run.<p>

She has a black eye, her lip is split and her hair is sticking to her face in wet tendrils.

Cursed to fear everything, even when you're safe. She is dripping water on the tiles of the Agni Kai arena, moving closer to the scarless Zuko she had known. His eyes are as red as the comet that brought her demise.

You have no idea how terrified I am. Her voice betrays no emotion, but for once her eyes do.

You have plenty to die for. He tells her. But nothing to live for.

I have myself. She whispers. Isn't that enough? There is blood in her eyes again, her hair is falling out.

It will never be enough. He says, perfectly still. You always did everything you possibly could just to earn an iota of the affection Ozai owed you as your father.

You're wrong. I did it for myself. She bites back tears.

Then why is it that you're always falling apart?

She springs toward him, quick as a cat; he breaks apart like so many pieces of mirror.

Then she starts falling.

* * *

><p>Her first few moments in reality are surprisingly calm. Her eyes fluttered open and she took a deep reassuring breath- which is unspeakably painful, thus causing her to hiss a string of colorful swear words through her clenched teeth.<p>

"I didn't know it was possible to do that with a boomerang." Toph stood beside her bed, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed. She was in a new lantern-lit room on the ground floor with a view of one of the courtyards. It was still dark out; for a moment Azula was irrationally terrified that the sun was gone forever.

"What the hell…" She managed to wheeze.

"You've been out for almost two days, it's a good thing you woke up- Snoozles was distraught."

"I was not!" Sokka protested vehemently from his seat in the opposite corner.

"He found you dying in the garden," Toph said with typical nonchalance. "With a punctured lung. It took Katara _and_ Aang to fix it. I hope you're grateful."

"You got blood on me." Sokka grumbled.

"I'm sure it was a vast improvement." Azula said deprecatingly.

Toph and Sokka shared a look that clearly said: "Yup. She's all better."

"You sure did take your time waking up too; usually the effects of healing are instantaneous. So what happened to you, prissy? "

She had to move, she had to leave. It had been too long. Long Feng had never meant for her to cause a distraction. She _was_ the distraction. How could she have let him get that close to her?

While the tiny earthbender rambled on, Azula rolled to the side in an attempt to launch herself out of bed. With the searing pain in her chest she was only capable of stumbling to the other end of the bed and clinging to the post for support. It was terribly unbecoming of her; she could feel her disheveled hair sticking out at odd angles.

"Hold on. Where do you think you're going?" Toph asked sternly.

"Where is Zuko." She rasped.

"He's been busy. Considering your father escaped and all." Toph shrugged.

"Shit." Azula said under her breath.

"That's… exactly what we were thinking." Sokka and Toph glanced at one another once again.

"Get Zuko." She demanded.

"Okay, geez. Don't kill yourself." If Toph could have rolled her eyes she would.

"And get me some tea!" Azula added before the girl left the room but the door slammed instead.

Azula slid back against her pillow cautiously and climbed under the blankets. She was feeling abnormally chilled. The robe someone had thrown around her hung loosely around her thin frame. "So. I suppose this means you are free from your debt." Azula said arrogantly after an uncomfortably long moment of silence.

"Oh it does. You were very lucky I just happened to be taking a stroll at exactly the right time." They faced each other guardedly from their respective positions.

"How lucky for you." She looked out the dark window. "A braver man would have left me to die." She knew she shouldn't be saying it, but she couldn't help herself.

"Even if I didn't owe you a debt I still would have saved you." He confessed. Azula was suddenly engrossed with the remaining blood stains on her ring. A bit of detached skin on the nail-bed of her thumb caught her attention. But when she started to pull at it, her entire nail came off. She looked upward warily at Sokka, who had not noticed.

"What were you doing in the garden anyway?" She asked, maintaining her sneer and trying not to display her bewilderment.

"It was the full moon." He said blankly, as though that explained everything. "You know… they say that once you save a person's life you're responsible for it forever." He mentioned tentatively. "Zuko and Katara have saved each other too many times to count now…"

"I seriously hope that's not true. No one could ever be responsible for you, Sokka. That's more work than one person can handle." She said distantly, looking forlorn as if she regretted something.

Sokka's lips parted in surprise. He wasn't aware Azula even knew his name.

The door swung open with unnecessary force and Zuko stepped in. "You mind telling me what the fuck happened to you?" He said in a low, dangerous, tone Sokka hadn't heard since Zuko stopped trying to kill him.

Azula sat up straighter, furrowing her brow in disapproval. "Is there something bothering you?" She said acerbically.

"Am I just supposed to believe that you _let_someone stab you?"

"Apparently someone practical decided to murder me. Why make the trip up Caldera Crater twice when you can free Ozai and kill Azula in one fell swoop? And I'll have you know that someone ambushed me from behind."

"You think they're connected?" He said, freezing in place.

"Of course, DumDum. It certainly wasn't a coincidence." She said in a nauseatingly sweet pitch.

Zuko crossed his arms. "So who would want to stab you?"

Azula smiled at the carelessness of his words. "It's an occupational hazard. When you play reckless war games, you're going to be betrayed more than once. It could have been anyone. But I have a few plausible theories…"

* * *

><p>"<strong>they say that once you save a person's life you're responsible for it forever" taken from Hitchcock's <em>Vertigo <em>**

**You may choose to ignore the odd little anecdote about Zhao at the beginning, I just wanted to emphasize that he was the pinnacle of Fire Nation sucess but still failed somehow. (and the crack!shipper in me couldn't resist)**

**P.S. Mai is making an appearance in the next chapter!**


	10. Songless

Chapter X Songless

**A/N: Tons of things are getting crossed off in my notebook now! Huzzah! **

**Thank you all for waiting so long! Here is a reward for your patience... nearly 4,000 words. **

**I apologize for this chapter (what I reveal, at least) in advance. I'm certain it will be aggravating for some.**

"_Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die" _

_Malachy McCourt _

* * *

><p>"This is a mistake!" Azula yelled, trying to keep up with her brother's long strides. Some days she loathed being shorter than most of her opponents more than anything else.<p>

Her limbs were aching after being in bed for too long and she was desperately attempting to keep the overlarge robe closed. "You can't mobilize the army, Long Feng has ears everywhere." _I__should__know._ "What will he think when you show up on his doorstep? You can't even be sure he's behind this." _But__he__is._

"It makes perfect sense. If Long Feng did free him, Father would be honor-bound to owe him a debt of gratitude." The Fire Lord said gruffly.

"It's positively adorable that you still think father would actually repay a debt of gratitude, but I'm sure Long Feng does not share that logic."

He glanced at her, his expression was riddled with condescension and annoyance. "Azula, father himself taught me about honor…"

"Zuko, you pathetically hopeless bastard." She said with feeling. Zuko looked taken aback. "Isn't it obvious to you by now that honor is self-endowed? One simply has to say "I am honorable." Why do you let other people define honor for you? I certainly don't." She said proudly.

"And look where it's gotten you. How are you enjoying your gilded cage?"

_Could__be__a__lot__worse_. She thought, remembering the temple. "I'm not having this argument with you. You're clearly irrational, you probably value honor over your own life. And believe me Zuko; there will come a time when honor is worthless to you." They glared at each other for a long moment. "What if he isn't involved? How do you justify going to see him then?"

Zuko refused to face her as they entered his study. "If Long Feng isn't involved we will convince him to unite with us against a common enemy." He tried to disregard her words and looked out on the city in the brightening darkness of the early morning.

"That will take some convincing." She scoffed, lighting the torches and lanterns with unassuming orange flames.

"That's why I'm bringing you." He said begrudgingly, clasping his hands behind his back.

"You… what?" She spluttered, fighting a massive unexpected coughing fit. She clutched the arm of one of the ornate chairs.

"Azula?" Zuko turned to face her finally, that terrible conflicted look she had become too familiar with was plastered on his face.

She removed her hand to find it covered in blood. He knelt beside her, crimson robes pooling around him. "Are you okay?" He inquired, grasping her wrist instinctively. His eyes went wide- her skin was cool to the touch.

"It stings a little but I'll survive." She said irritably, smacking his arm away.

"Hold on I'll call for Katara." The communications system a man known as the Mechanist had installed had proved to be quite useful, but it wasn't always reliable. She wiped her hand on the upholstery while his back was turned and smiled slyly. "Hi, this is the Fire Lord speaking- it would be really nice if you could send someone up here to tell me why my sister is coughing up blood… Thanks…" He sounded so nervous and hesitant that Azula had to laugh. She was crouching on the ground with a hand over her racing heart unable to contain herself when Zuko turned around again.

"Your lungs- what's wrong?"

"We _match_." She gasped gleefully. She suddenly had the terrible feeling that she couldn't control this outburst.

"What are you talking about?" He took a step back from her. He could sense it too.

"I hit you with lightning." She began to unwrap her white bandages from the bottom, working upward.

"What are you doing?" He wondered, eyes wide.

"I hit you in the center of the chest!" She gasped. "Look!"

Then Zuko saw what she meant. Above her flat stomach and between her ribs there was a wide red gash. The resemblance was uncanny.

"If only your Water savage had punched me in the eye, we would be two of a kind!" She gasped, dabbing tears from the corner of her eyes.

Zuko watched her helplessly, his lips pulled into a sullen line. It had always been like this, she would be his friend and suddenly become his nightmare without warning. He had never been capable of hating Azula, only how she hung him out to dry, especially when he needed an ally. She had turned her back on him too many times. He supposed he would have to get re-accustomed to this, the fleeting bouts of composure interspersed with bursts of raw emotion.

"What is wrong with me…" She wondered aloud to no one in particular, voice threatening to deteriorate into something more revealing.

By the time the palace healers arrived she had concerted herself and insisted that she was fine, but hadn't been able to get off the floor. She went with them anyway, dragging her bare feet.

* * *

><p>"She's doing much better now. The blood was just left over from her injury, it should go away soon." Katara told Zuko in a room with the curtains drawn.<p>

"Does she know who could have stabbed her?" Aang asked quietly.

"She can't seem to narrow her list of enemies down enough to come up with a probable suspect." Zuko replied darkly. "I'm still taking her with me. She's negotiated with him before. I'll be taking the entire royal procession and an airship; I doubt she'll be tempted to murder me." He had avoided telling them about her outburst yesterday.

"Is it really necessary for you to go? I only just got back." Mai was slouched in a chair to his right, her voice was bordering on whiny. She languidly adjusted the razor pins in her hair.

"Some things are too important for me not to make an appearance." He said gravely.

"You could be walking into a trap." The Avatar mentioned, gripping his staff.

"If I'm not back in two days, you know where to find me." He said, smiling weakly. Katara was clearly disapproving (of course), Mai was downright grumpy (nothing new), and Aang looked worried (as usual). "I want to leave within the hour."

"So… you're going to go wake her up?" Aang said uneasily.

"You have a point. My sister is not someone you want to wake up in the middle of the night." He admitted, equally apprehensive. The four of them were silent for a long moment.

Eventually Mai stood and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "pussies" then promptly proceeded to do an about face to the door with her usual severe elegance. No one immediately moved to stop her.

It was bound to happen sooner or later. Mai reasoned. She might as well face Azula while she was exposed and unsuspecting. Mai reached the hall that led to her quarters. It was lit ominously with torches that glowed red against the walls. She turned the corner cautiously.

Azula was lying with her hands calmly folded over her chest, as pale as ash. "Time to wake the fuck up Azula." Mai droned, sighing and crossing her arms to make sure all her knives were in place. She casually threw a morningstar into her head board, but her old leader didn't stir. Mai approached her like a ghost, her chest was barely moving. Maybe Katara had been wrong. She may have died from an undetected injury. "Azula." She said again, peering down at her bluish eyelids.

Her eyes shot open and she sprung bodily at Mai. Azula's fingers closed around her throat and they tumbled off the bed and onto the floor. "If you love him so much then _die_ for him." Azula said in a tempting whisper. Mai reached up to crush Azula's trachea between her thumbs, if only to shut her up. There was a cruel cold fire in her eyes that Mai was too familiar with.

Just as her vision was beginning to blacken, a gust of wind thrust them apart. "Clearly I cannot trust you two to be in the same country at the same time!" Zuko roared.

"We finally meet again!" Azula wheezed with false pleasantry. "I've been dying to do that for ages now!"

Mai was rubbing her head where she had been thrown against a wall. Katara knelt beside her and Aang still hadn't removed his force field from between them. Zuko dragged his sister up by the scruff of the neck.

"You're a sick fucking monster." Mai panted, running her fingers along her throat. Katara seized some water from her traveling skin and set to work on the impending bruises.

"_Everyone_knows that, Mai. Especially me" Azula spat before being thrown out of the room.

"You're getting on that damn airship and maybe if you're lucky I'll let Long Feng keep you in one of his cells just like you imprisoned Uncle." He said under his breath. _If __there__'__s __one __thing __I __know __about __my __sister __it__'__s __that __she__'__s __a __liar.__She__'__s __so __good, __in __fact,__that __it__'__s __easy __to __forget __she __is __one._ At times like these he recalled how truly despicable she was.

"Ah, Zuzu that just warms my heart." She said breathlessly, allowing him to push her out of the palace and out under the stars.

* * *

><p>She rode through Ba Sing Se chained to a komodo-rhino, followed closely by a royal honor guard with a dozen arrows pointed at her back. Maybe Zuko had done this to humiliate her, but at least she was dressed nicely and her high collar concealed the ring of bruises on her neck. It was mostly dark, not many people came out to watch her pass by. Zuko sat brooding and looking dejected on his own ostrich-horse.<p>

"Princess?" An unexpected voice called out. A man ran out into the street. Judging by his clothes, he was a simple peasant. Azula usually ignored these people, deeming them undeserving of her attention. "Are you the princess of the broken mirror?" Azula stopped short. No one knew about that save herself. Zuko glanced back curiously.

"I…" Azula realized she had nothing to say to that. She stared at him blankly.

"There is a wise woman in my village, who foretells very accurate prophesies. She told me if I was to see a princess during my travels I should send you to see her."

"I'm busy at the moment. I can't visit a hedge witch in some obscure village just so she can tell me how many children I'll have." Azula growled and tugged her cloak closer to her body.

"She brings tidings of your death. Yours is an impressive tale, as sweet as a summer breeze, as sad as a songbird who does not know any songs." Azula detested oracles, and she was contemplating shutting this one up once and for all. Zuko was staring at her intently now.

"Don't you want to know about your death?" He continued amiably.

"Not particularly. Why?" Azula raised an eyebrow. She was oddly calm and Zuko noticed.

"Everyone wants to know how they die. And yours is a beautiful death."

"You presume too much peasant. Besides, I already know." She kicked her mount into movement again and moved on to the upper ring without another mention of the encounter.

* * *

><p>"We should meet in neutral territory." Zuko said, standing at the edge of the moat.<p>

"We're in Ba Sing Se." Azula reminded him dolorously. "There is no such thing as neutral territory."

The bridge landed before them with a mighty crash that stirred up enough wind to blow their hair around. As they had suspected, Long Feng knew they were coming. He appeared on the other side beneath one of the giant gates. Zuko and Azula crossed the expanse of stone side by side. They were forced to leave the entire procession behind as a sign of good faith. Long Feng approached them with an unctuous grin highlighted by his poor taste in facial hair.

"Good to see you back in my fair city, Azula. I admit I wasn't expecting to see you here again," He offered as a greeting. "I see you've brought your much more impressive brother."

_If __I __had __been __here __no __one __would __have __released __Ba __Sing __Se __from __my __control._ She thought. Long Feng didn't seem surprised that she had survived his assassination attempt, though.

"Long Feng." Zuko reluctantly inclined his head toward the other ruler.

"I just discovered that you have mobilized your military." He said airily.

"Our father just escaped and someone nearly killed Azula. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?" Zuko retorted firmly.

"Goodness no, but I'm happy to see you're doing just fine, Princess." He turned his smile toward her. Long Feng had put her in a terrible situation. He was making sure she couldn't accuse him unless she wanted to reveal her previous involvement.

"I don't see why we can't be partners." Long Feng continued. "I simply ask that you demobilize your army and allow me to rule Ba Sing Se unhindered. After all," He turned to Azula. "You were the one that took it from me."

"Come now, Long Feng. How many functional business relationships have you known to begin with an ultimatum?" Azula leered, gazing at him slyly. This was the game they played.

"I am simply suggesting a compromise, Princess."

Azula recoiled from the word.

"What are your terms?" Zuko queried, always the peacekeeper.

"Come on Zuko. Let's go before this idiot has the chance to make a bigger ass of himself." She wasn't going to make a deal with a man who had tried to kill her. She would plant incriminating evidence for Zuko to find later and persuade him to believe Long Feng had freed their father. Azula turned to walk away, and Zuko moved to follow apprehensively.

"If you leave now, Fire Lord Zuko, your sister's life is forfeit."

Azula spun around to face him.

Long Feng was smirking with confidence and superiority.

"What are you talking about?" Zuko spat ignorantly, oblivious to the fact that he had been bested.

"I should have known you would take the coward's way out." She said coolly, addressing her fellow chess master. "Really, there just isn't any creativity anymore when it comes to dispatching your enemies. In our line of work it is a fading and unappreciated art, wouldn't you agree?"

Zuko was looking quickly from Long Feng to Azula as though he was going mad.

"You're already feeling the effects of it, aren't you?" He asked her softly. "It's a warm night; you're wearing a cloak…"

"What the hell is going on…"

"Shut up Zuko for once in your life!" The admonishment came out a little more violently than she had actually meant it to.

"Your hands are trembling, your skin is peeling off, you can't eat without feeling sick, crippling headaches come and go, your reflexes have been deteriorating- oh and you're having difficulty breathing, correct? Firebending corresponds with your breath, doesn't it? That's one of the more convenient effects. If you do not cooperate, Zuko, your sister will never recover. You already bear the burdens of your dishonored nation- could you possibly bear the guilt of her death?"

Zuko was looking at her in horror. Azula suddenly found herself in a terribly awkward situation and in need of a plan. She wanted to tell Long Feng that he had grotesquely overestimated her value and that Zuko would gladly hand her life over to him before dooming his country.

Cities would not burn for her sake, soldiers would no longer fall with her name on their lips, many people would willingly die to ensure that no more disorder would be inflicted on the world due to Princess Azula of the House of Agni. Zuko would let empires disintegrate for anyone but her. But upon second examination, once his initial shock had worn off, she saw something like hesitation in his eyes. _Don__'__t__ruin__this__Zuko._ She pleaded silently. Then a simple but no less effective plan occurred to her.

"Don't be foolish," She responded calmly. "There is no antidote. As soon as I detected that something was wrong I used every last one of my resources. Eventually I found the information I was looking for."

Long Feng had gone very pale very quickly.

Azula realized what she supposed she had always known.

"You…poisoned her?" Zuko sounded as if he was choking on the information.

"I thought you would be pleased. She's so much less threatening now, isn't she." Long feigned friendliness easily, the corner of his mouth curled into a mocking grin.

"Why? Why would you…" Zuko croaked. Azula grabbed his arm, willing him to stay quiet. This didn't involve him and she didn't want him to say anything she didn't want to hear…

"Think of it as insurance."

"We have nothing to offer you, and you have nothing to offer us. This talk is over." Azula cut in, before her brother could ask what the insurance was for. "Zuko?" She said sharply, tugging his arm.

"There were only two possible outcomes." Long Feng kept speaking in spite of her. "Either you joined us and died before you had the chance to cause any real problems, and you cannot deny you would have, or, on the slim chance you decided not to join us- you would die before you could rise against us. Unfortunately, your usefulness ran out much earlier than I expected it to." Zuko fled from her side like she was contagious. She looked down and took a sharp intake of breath. The gears in her head were working, but not quickly enough.

"I sent the assassin before you could cause any immediate damage." Long Feng said, studying her.

"You've been in on this the entire time?" Zuko realized, the betrayal in his eyes irritated her more than anything else.

"It's your own damn fault you decided to trust me again Zuko." He really was incorrigible; he looked like a kicked puppy.

"Your father says the offer still stands, though I doubt that is any consolation at this point."

The revelation hit her like rockslide. "Father? He…?" Azula felt as though she would fall to her knees in shock.

Long Feng filled in what she couldn't bring herself to say. "He knew, yes."

_This is not a revelation. Perhaps you were indispensable in the past,but he has no need of you any 've known all along,ever since those Fire Sages held you hostage, ever since Sokka rescued 've always known you foolish girl, you have always known._The voices were invading her headspace again; she hadn't heard them since she resolved to escape from the temple. Zuko was gratified too, she could feel it._ He's wronged you too, may have scarred Zuko but he killed you,you 's killed you._

She took a deep breath, even though it hurt twice as badly as it previously did.

"You were his last great lieutenant, after all. I see you're still devoted to him."

Azula's fingers curled around her thumb, partially concealing the ring. _Her__past,__her__future,__her__agony__her__glory._

"Sorry," She hissed, snapping out of her headspace before it could take control of her. "I'm fresh out of forgiveness."

"I'm leaving," Zuko announced, in an "I can't deal with this shit any more" kind of way.

"I think not, Fire Lord." Long Feng said, a little too serenely.

Azula dropped into a firebending stance, ready to blast him to hell.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Princess. Wouldn't want to waste your strength." Dai Li agents were slowly rising on the battlements. Some had crossbows; others were approaching too fast for her liking. _They__betrayed__me__in__the__end__anyway._She looked from right to left slowly, considering her options.

She couldn't hope to fight them all now. To her left, Zuko looked dumbfounded but ready to fend them off. _You__always__do__the__unexpected;__I__have__come__to__expect__it__of__you._

Azula threw a fire ball at Long Feng, forcing him to create a giant rock wall. She grabbed Zuko by the waist, took a deep breath and rocketed them both into the sky.

It was a short flight. But for her first time flying with a passenger, it wasn't so bad. They tumbled onto the parapet of the outer wall of the palace, far beyond the range of any arrows. "Of course," Zuko said, even more astonished than he had been. "You can fly! How could I have forgotten you could fly?" Azula didn't hear his shocked ramblings, though. Her lungs had temporarily seized and she was gasping like she was drowning on dry land. Plus, she had rolled a good 10 feet over the stone and was currently sporting a wide scratch on her forehead.

He pulled her to her feet and urged her into a run. If they could only make it just outside the wall and into the Upper Ring, their small army of guards would be there to protect them.

They vaulted down flights of stairs, skipping down steps like stones on water. Zuko was ahead of her, she cursed his long legs for the millionth time. She could hear the earth benders getting closer, but blood was starting to swirl in her head and her vision was blurring. He looked over his shoulder to tell her to hurry up, but she crumpled midway down the next flight. She clutched her stomach and grasped one of the metal bars on the railing. Zuko stopped and stared up at her, unsure of whether to go on without her or wait.

"Leave me, damn you." She said harshly, her brow furrowing. With every breath she sounded more like an ancient wheezing crone.

It suddenly felt extremely difficult to anchor herself to reality, and then it was pulled out from beneath her feet.

**A/N: Essentially, Azula knows that Zuko loves her in some twisted way, but she doesn't want to actually hear him say it. **

**And she's going to die. If someone can give me a Dr. House-esque differential diagnosis I will be thrilled. **

"**last great lieutenant" taken from Harry Potter. Bellatrix is to Voldemort as Azula is to Ozai. Fitting right? **

**Unfortunately, I have become rather detached from the fandom as of late and I need to immerse myself again before I write anything new. I plan on re-watching the entire show over Christmas break, then I'll be able to churn out some quality text for your enjoyment. **

* * *

><p><strong>Could really use some reviews at the moment, good and bad. I need some reassurance for life in general. All contributions are appreciated. <strong>


	11. Total Eclipse

**Chapter XI: Total Eclipse**

In the pull of the wind I stand, lonely,

On the deck of a ship, rising, falling,

Wild night around me, wild water under me,

Whipped by the storm, screaming and calling.

Earth is hostile and the sea hostile,

Why do I look for a place to rest?

I must fight always and die fighting

With fear an unhealing wound in my breast.

_At Sea_, Sarah Teasdale

* * *

><p>So this was how it began, and this was how it ended. Zuko thought wistfully.<p>

Azula had been born on the winter solstice, a day that did not bode well for a princess of the Fire Nation. She had been blue and stillborn and as much of a disappointment as she was hopeless. Moments later the color returned to Azula's skin and she opened her eyes. They had been gray at first, almost a pale blue. For months they couldn't seem to settle on a permanent color. "A dragon's eyes." Their father had proclaimed proudly.

But now it was the end of summer and Azula's golden eyes were closed. She was sprawled out on the floor of a dirty cell with her black shoulder-length hair splayed around her, her skin looked paler than ivory in the waning moonlight. She liked the beach as much as any fun-loving Fire Nation citizen, but her skin was as impervious to the sun as marble. Imminent death made his feverishly restless and uncontrollably brilliant sister look more human than she ever had before.

Zuko sat comfortably with his back pressed up against the wall. He was no stranger to prisons.

"Why didn't you tell me you were sick?" He demanded when she finally stirred.

She raised herself up on an elbow and rubbed her eye with the palm of her hand, still managing to look poised at the same time. "Well forgive me for thinking you wouldn't give a shit."

"When did it happen?"

"I don't know."

"But you said-"

"I know what I said," She said shortly. "I lied." She sat up slowly, surveying her torn clothes. "When he told you- you should have killed me to show that you still had the upper hand. You were lucky you had me there to cover for you." Zuko wasn't sure if she was being mordant or completely serious. "In fact I'm surprised you didn't strangle me while I was unconscious. Don't tell me you were waiting for me to wake up so I could put up a decent fight." She said incredulously.

"You took me with you when you flew off." He stated, ignoring her remarks.

"For all the good it did us. It tickles me to think about how you would have tortured yourself over that- if I had died saving you without explanation." She combed her fingers back through her hair. A few more of her nails had fallen off.

"I don't think I would have. I knew you would turn on me the first chance you got. I just never thought you would…" Zuko shook his head and banished the thought. "But now I think you've _really _learned your lesson." He said.

"About what." She said waspishly.

"You won't ever trust father ever again after this. I bet he was the one that imprisoned you too. Unless that was part of your scheme as well?" He shot at her moodily.

"No." Azula confessed against her better judgment. "That was legitimate."

"What did you do to make him angry?" He asked, pointing to his face. "It must have been pretty bad to earn you a slow and painful death." It was clearly meant as a barb.

Azula abruptly tipped her head back and laughed. "Look at us, the royal siblings. I'm dying and you're disfigured and we are all hopelessly dysfunctional. We'll make an epic tavern ballad."

"Glad to see you haven't lost your misguided sense of irony." Zuko wasn't sure he could call it 'humor'. "I guess we're going to have to wait for Aang to rescue us." He sighed, letting the handful of filth he had gathered sift to the floor. "I would ask you to just melt the bars if I didn't think you would keel over afterward."

"Why don't you do it?" She said, flipping her short black hair behind her bony shoulder. Her lips curled inward as she appraised him. Zuko suddenly felt like he was a pig and she was contemplating taking him to the slaughter house. He shook his head.

"No, I probably couldn't." Anything he did would look meek and unworthy compared to her feats.

Azula exhaled noisily and rolled her eyes. "This is why you shouldn't be Fire Lord."

"Are you really going to start this right now?"

"Your attempts to capture the Avatar were all such miserable, humiliating failures that they actually took pity on you. In fact, I'm pretty sure they _let _you catch them a few times just to boost your confidence. Now they're saving you from your own problems." She laughed callously. "I am much more qualified to rule the Fire Nation. I was born with the mandate of heaven, after all."

""Perhaps you have forgotten that I was born with the same right-"

"Yes, but you were weak and everyone knew it. Father especially. He also knew that there was no way you would accept his challenge in an Agni Kai. He always meant for me to be his heir.

"Shut up Azula." He warned.

"That general you insulted was going to be the one to challenge you, but Father changed the plan. He saw an opportunity and he used it to eliminate you."

"How the hell do you know-" She was pleased to see his fists were engulfed in flames.

"I heard everything in those days, don't you remember? Can you blame me for waiting for a moment like this? I'm trapped in a cell with you, slowly dying, and rapidly running out of time to tell you these details. Of course mother wasn't there to save you then, she just couldn't defend you anymore…"

That did it. She skillfully dodged the blast of fire she expected was meant for her, but was coincidentally aimed toward the metal bars.

Azula was climbing out of the considerable hole he had made while the metal was still burning angry red.

"That worked surprisingly well. Fantastically well done, Zuzu." She said sarcastically, analyzing the gap with her hands on her hips. "You'd better hurry up. Someone heard that, I'm sure."

He stared at the princess, looking ragged and homeless in her overlarge cloak, in disbelief. "Was any of that true?" He said, once he realized what she had done. _If there's one thing I know about my sister it's that she's a liar. She's so good, in fact, that it's easy to forget she is one._

She shrugged noncommittally. "It could have been."

* * *

><p>"They wouldn't dare follow us. We have at least 80 guards and The Jasmine Dragon is practically an embassy, a sanctuary for people of all nations." Zuko resolvedly declared once they were safely in the upper ring surrounded by warriors.<p>

"In case you haven't noticed, Long Feng isn't exactly playing by the rules. If I were him, 80 guards and a "sanctuary" wouldn't stop me." Azula reasoned, complete with air quotes.

"Well Long Feng wouldn't risk that many lives and his public image, he has better judgment. You, on the other hand, are just a destructive person." Zuko stated.

"It wasn't my idea to start a war to usurp your throne Zuzu, that folly belongs to Long Feng. If I had my way it would have been a simple coup."

"This is still technically your fault. You can't deny that you started it."

"I think you started it when you rudely interrupted my coronation."

"I really think this can all be traced back to you trying to track me down and kill me."

"Which wouldn't have been necessary if you had done your fucking job and captured the Avatar. Your failure in the North Pole is unquestionably the origin of this disaster."

The door to the building upon whose steps they had been standing opened, flooding light onto the dark street. "While I am pleasantly surprised to find my niece and my nephew on my doorstep, I think it would be better if we took this "who started what war" fight inside." Their uncle said amiably.

Even Royal siblings have mundane fights, although they usually take place on a much grander scale.

Azula, who had not previously been aware of the significance of the Jasmine Dragon, blinked several times and glared at Zuko. "Of all the Tea Shops in Ba Sing Se…"

"This one is the best!" Zuko nodded, proceeding up the rest of the steps.

Azula made a brief frustrated noise and followed him into the shop, regardless of her detest for its owner.

"You must be very weary. Can I offer you some tea?"

"Of course." Zuko accepted, smiling warmly.

Azula scowled.

The inside of the Jasmine Dragon was perfectly kept and artistically decorated. The bright illumination marked it as a firebender's abode.

"It's been so busy since you left; I've had to hire a helper! Business has been good, of course, but these spies that are constantly checking up on me are bothersome. I just liberated the city, why can't it just stay liberated?" Iroh always had a good sense of humor. "What type of tea do you prefer, Azula?" Her uncle asked politely.

"Black," She replied flatly. "As black as possible."

He nodded and continued his ministrations. He looked healthy wearing extravagant clothes and a well groomed beard. Azula took a seat without being offered. Her legs were getting stiff and her headache was not improving her mood.

"I assume you have not come by for small-talk?" Uncle Iroh wondered aloud. He surveyed her carefully. The scratch across her forehead was probably dreadful looking, but at least her high collar covered the red welts circling her neck.

"No," Zuko told him candidly and glanced at Azula, who did not acknowledge him. He launched into the entire story without her assistance. Iroh's eyes widened at certain points but he did not otherwise react. Azula endured the entire narration looking down at the fine table with her arms crossed. At some point Iroh placed a blue and white porcelain teacup in front of her, filled with opaque black liquid. By the end Iroh was staring at her thoughtfully.

"So that is why you have brought her into my presence." He observed. "Perhaps the tea will do you some good, Azula."

Azula raised her teacup to him in contempt. "Here's hoping the great General of the West had enough sense to put a poison that will kill me _quickly_ in this tea." She said patronizingly, taking several large gulps and setting it back down on the table. "Drat." She announced after a few moments.

"How do you plan to fix this situation? You are at least partially to blame." If her Uncle was hoping for her to take some responsibility he was disappointed.

"I suppose it's none of my concern now." She said stoically.

"I believe you need to make peace with yourself before you can make peace with anyone else, Azula. Lay that on your heart my dear." He said solemnly, remembering a time when she had been unstoppable and destructive and extremely problematic. But she was not the first his brother and wronged and it seemed she would not be the last. He could feel nothing but pity and compassion for his niece, who was beginning to remind him more like his nephew with every passing moment.

Except for her sheer wit and malice.

"Thank you so much, Uncle. Next time someone asks me where they can find some tea and bullshit, I'll be sure to direct them to you." She stood and turned her back to them.

"Azula!" Zuko exclaimed.

Iroh chuckled quite unexpectedly. "It is alright, Zuko. I am rather used to it."

Zuko paled considerably. Azula was too busy examining the unique Pai Sho board set up in the right corner to notice.

"Perhaps you would be so kind as to grant this poor old man an invigorating game of Pai Sho." Iroh said kindly.

"I don't see why not." She sighed, as though she had a million reasons why she would rather not. Even so, she had nothing better to entertain herself, and war strategy was always amusing.

She sat on one of the stools and lit a candle sitting in the window. "I suppose I can't call you Uncle Fatso anymore." She said between coughs.

"I have prison to thank for that. And you, I suppose. You have the first move." He graced her with a loaded stare.

Azula made an apathetic "hmm" noise and began to dig around in a rectangular bamboo box full of Pai Sho tiles. She finally procured a tile and set it neatly on the board.

Iroh forgot to breathe for a moment. Zuko went stiff in the background.

"I see you favor the white lotus gambit. Not many still cling to the ancient ways." It was practically a reflex for Iroh to give the proper greeting when a white lotus tile was placed on the board.

Azula raised an eyebrow, questioning his senility. "The only ways I cling to are my own." She replied obliviously, placing the rest of her tiles purposefully on the board.

"It is an interesting strategy to use. The white lotus can potentially be taken by another player, but it could also lead to their demise. It is an interesting symbol too." He said, pouring himself some more ginseng and placing his tiles on the board.

"Oh?" Azula was gripping her chin between her thumb and forefinger, scanning the board meticulously.

"It is said that lotuses are immortal, they open in the light of the rising sun and close at dusk, but their powerful scent lingers for centuries."

This was one of Iroh's quirks that had always annoyed Azula. Her uncle's poetical rants were little more than idealist daydreams, he seemed to drift away from reality at times. It only started when he returned from his failed siege of Ba Sing Se.

"It's also a very stupid symbol." She said dully. "Most lotuses, uncle, are blue." She moved the piece in question closer to the center of the board and pulled her hand back quickly so he wouldn't notice her trembling.

Zuko stood up suddenly. "I am going see if the balloon is ready. Uncle, can you handle…" He looked at Azula and Iroh apprehensively for a moment, but all he saw was an old man and his sickly niece. Zuko shook his head and hastily walked out the door.

"So how is my nephew holding up as Fire Lord?" Iroh inquired casually, pouring himself yet another cup of tea.

"Terrible. He's doing an awful job." Azula replied emotionlessly, staring out the panorama window.

"You don't sound very concerned." He said skeptically, moving one of his tiles.

"I am not a ruler of my country anymore. Why should I be?" She turned her attention back to him, demanding a plausible answer.

"I would not be so sure about that. In many ways you still influence your brother."

"Ha! Really now?" She recklessly slapped another tile down at random.

"You have betrayed Zuko in every possible way."

"And yet he still wants me around."

"Precisely. He feels guilty and you are the only one who can forgive him. For the longest time it was his duty to uphold the ways of the Fire Nation. It was a burden he shared with you. He trusted and respected the system of loyalty and fealty. Now he figures if there's one person who can forgive him for causing the collapse of the dynasty, it's you. I believe he thinks that if you forgive him, the opinion of others will not matter anymore."

"Zuko just can't stand the fact that I live in contempt of him. He wants more than my approval, he wants universal approval and as Fire Lord and that is something he will never receive."

"We both know you will never give him your approval or your forgiveness and he is a fool for attaching himself to you. We also know that Zuko has a hard time letting go of things, and the most obvious is hope. It took him ages to denounce your father, and now that he has done that, he just can't let go of you. For everything he cannot bear to do, he has you."

"So he just constantly hopes that I will forgive him for an imagined plight?" She snorted, absently rubbing the peeling skin on her wrist.

"And that you will give up and redeem yourself."

"That's not a possibility at this point. It's almost embarrassing really, to have our entire family die out in the matter of a few short years. The House of the Rising Sun can be traced back over 2000 years and now we are just supposed to come to an end."

"Conquests are unpredictable and do not always end in glory. They are rarely appreciated and not easily forgotten. Sozin's territorial ambitions failed when his family did. Soon only Zuko will be left, and I'm not getting any younger."

"And the way things are going, I will be sent off to an early grave." Azula added wearily, swirling the dregs of her tea in her cup.

"He will be free to start a new dynasty. When the war ended so did our time. Ozai is not worthy and Lu Ten died many years ago…"

"Azula! Let's go, the coast is clear." Zuko commanded, peeking through the door.

She frowned. There should have been Dai Li agents lurking around every corner, maybe there were.

"I'm sorry we're just running out like this." Zuko told Iroh with an apologetic half-smile.

"I am glad to see you for any length of time." Iroh stood, abandoning the game. "I was just about to pay a visit to someone myself. You may certainly accompany me if you have the time to spare."

Zuko beamed at him. "Of course."

* * *

><p>Azula was not sure how much longer she would be able to do this. Considering she was lagging behind an elderly man, her near future did not look promising. She hadn't bothered to wonder where they were going; resolving to save her breath and make her jibes when they got there.<p>

"She will be fine, I'm sure of it. Azula has never shown weakness and I don't expect her to start now." Zuko had whispered to their last living relative when he thought she wasn't listening.

Something was rattling in her lungs and every once in a while she had to urge her stiffening legs to move faster as they traveled up the hill. Not to mention fighting the nausea that she had the tea to blame for. Azula didn't dare complain. Collapsing didn't seem like a good idea but it was still entirely appealing. Dawn had arrived by the time she caught sight of the giant tree.

_You have got to be kidding me._ She wanted to mock when she realized what the place was, but for once she kept her mouth shut. So this was the residence of her cousin's spirit in this world. One of the last members of Sozin's legacy was only remembered on a hillside in an alien land.

Iroh knelt and rearranged the floral offerings and lit a stick of incense. He started to hum a familiar tune as Zuko made his own offering of modest wildflowers.

Her eyes widened when she fully recognized the long forgotten song. It wasn't that she never knew any songs; she had just forgotten them somewhere far from home.

Zuko glared at her. _He was your cousin too._ He communicated silently. _Show some respect._

Azula raised a weary eyebrow at him before the first chilling note of Leaves From the Vine rolled off her tongue. Iroh was just as surprised as her brother was and they watched her in astonishment. Exhaustion made her appear completely emotionless as she sang in a haunting and defiant voice. Every word of the song her mother had once used as a lullaby returned to her then. When she finally ended it and the soldier boy had been carried home, she stood there silently as though it had never occurred. Her lips were pulled into a sullen line and concerned lines highlighted her brow.

"Thank you." Iroh said quietly.

Azula simply nodded curtly and marched back down the hill, offering no explanation.

* * *

><p>More unexpected developments! (sorry if this chapter was a little chatty)<p>

Review please! (I feel like I am constantly seeking validation, but nevertheless, it is reassuring to know you are still reading. Fear not for the fate of our dear Azula, unexpected events are abound!)


	12. Sic Transit Gloria

Chapter XII Sic Transit Gloria

"_Glory is a heavy burden, a murdering poison, and to bear it is an art. And to have that art is rare."_

Orianna Fallaci

"You've been having a rough month, huh?" Toph taunted. She hardly needed her feet to sense Azula's presence.

Azula was sitting on a stone bench and watching the turtleducks frolic in the last of the summer heat. "That's an understatement."

She was wearing one of the last gowns she had commissioned before her coronation. The custom design featured faded snakes intertwined with vines of red velvet flowers on a background of sheer white. Now that she had realized that she wouldn't have a chance to wear it to any special occasion, she had taken to wearing it around the palace during the day.

"Zuko asked me to keep an eye on you. He also asked me not to tell you, so if you could just pretend to be oblivious that would be great." The younger girl's hair had fallen in front of her eyes but she didn't seem to care.

Breaking the news to Zuko's friends had gone exactly like she had expected it to. Katara's hand had shot up to cover her mouth in shock. The Avatar looked older, his eyes had grown cold and the set of his brow was stern. Sokka kept looking at everyone, waiting for one of them to announce that it was just another prank.

"So Zuko has you doing his dirty work now? What are you doing here anyway? You are still just a child. You must have a family that wonders where you get off to." Azula knew it was a sore point for the metal-bender.

"I'm almost the same age as you when you started chasing us. Your family didn't seem to mind." Toph knew how to play just as well as Azula did. "Come to think of it, you could have turned out worse, considering how you were raised."

"What are you talking about?" Azula twisted her lips together and gave Toph a genuinely curious glare.

"You know, with your family so screwed up and all." She shrugged.

Azula looked as though someone had struck her between the eyes. "I cannot imagine what you are referring to. My family was not 'screwed up". She fiddled with her crimson collar.

Toph looked skeptical, but didn't object. "Everyone's looking for a cure for you, you know."

"You people are trying to kill me with valiance." Azula snarked. "Why won't you let me die?"

"Look, you don't like accepting help and I get it." She placed a hand on Azula's arm. Toph felt what she expected to, the princess' heart was beating too fast but her skin was cold. Azula looked down at the hand suspiciously. "But you could at least try to help yourself."

"I have plenty to die for, but nothing to live for." The words gave her a vague sense of déjà vu like they were from a half-remembered dream. "But I would still rather be dead than blind." She massaged her eyelids restlessly.

"I would still rather be a dirty kid than a spoiled princess." Toph said impertinently.

"You cannot put someone in a gilded cage and call them spoiled. Or royalty." Azula said bitterly. She made an indignant noise when the stone bench she was sitting on suddenly rejected her and tossed her into a flower bed.

"Wake up!" Toph stamped her foot, making the ground rumble. "You should be looking for your own antidote! You can't just sit back and wait to die!" Azula's attitude was obviously frustrating the master earthbender.

The princess stood up with dangerous control and dusted herself off. "You expect me to try and save myself? To what end? Disappointment?"

"Do you want to die?"

"No." Her face was bare of makeup and her hair hung straight and limp. "I want everything Zuko took from me back. I want every little piece that everyone's ever taken from me back." She hissed.

"Then what are you still doing here?" Toph raised a sarcastic eyebrow.

Azula left the garden in a swirl of semi-transparent fabric and dust.

Azula never gave up without a fight. But she was pretty sure she had already fought and lost this one. She felt as lost as she had been when the sages held her captive. She felt like she was on her knees again with blood in her eyes, subordinate in every way. _"Your crimes cannot go unpunished Princess."_

Her hair had grown back for the most part, but she hadn't bothered to locate her crown.

_There is no way I'm getting out of this alive. _It would take much too long to procure the miraculous healing water from the North Pole, not that the water spirits would be willing to help her anyway. As if they would lend their power to a child of Agni who had done everything in her power to ensure their annihilation. There was no remedy that Long Feng knew of. Katara couldn't understand what was wrong with her…

"Katara can't keep putting your sister back together every time she falls apart!" She heard Sokka yell. Azula stopped short behind a giant pillar. The vast balcony with a full view of the volcano and the sea below was harshly lit in the noon sun.

"Sokka please." His sister implored gently. "I'm not a warrior, I'm a healer, I can't just let her…" Katara stifled the last word.

"The only reason she came back to the palace was because she needed someone to take care of her! She had better be gone by the time I come back." Sokka didn't seem to be taking the news well. "She would have joined her father in an instant if he hadn't…"

"Poisoned her?" Zuko filled in scathingly.

"Why would a father poison his own daughter?" The Avatar wondered as though it was a very sad and unexpected event.

"He burned Zuko's face off. Don't be so surprised." Azula had chosen that moment to reveal herself, so they were surprised regardless. "Oh, and I can assure you that I won't be here." She addressed Sokka. In the moment before he turned away from her, all the color drained from his face and he seemed unreasonably troubled. Azula casually leaned against pillar for support. "I'll be nice and cozy in my crypt by then. I have it all picked out, it's going to be marvelous."

Sokka stared her down as he made his way toward the corridor she had come from. She met his icy eyes with loathing until she turned them demurely to the floor. "You're invited to visit me whenever you wish!" She called after him. He knocked over a decorative bowl of fruit in response. Azula wasn't concerned or particularly taken aback. Mai had left before she returned so she had little to worry about. But she couldn't suppress the raw, disappointing frustration she felt for the sword-master now. She sighed and approached Zuko.

"He doesn't really mean that." Aang said meekly. "He just doesn't know how to deal with…"

The Avatar's astute speculations dropped off into silence as Azula caught her brother's eye. He could barely look at her, and not directly.

"You don't know what to say to me, do you?" She said to Zuko. The blue circles around her eyes and the previously non-existent lines were more prominent in this light. "No encouragement or comfort or dare I say it- empathy?" He looked like he thought she was going to slap him. "Aren't you happy? You got what you wanted. You won! I've sunk to your level! I am every bit as pathetic and sad as you are."

Zuko sharply turned and walked away, looking completely empty and not entirely there. Katara enthusiastically followed him, most likely to offer moral support.

"Tell me you're satisfied Zuzu, I know you are!" Before Azula could follow, the Avatar halted her with his staff.

"Why do you torture him?" He asked wearily.

"I've done it all my life. Why stop now?"

"I understand why you don't trust anyone, but why can't you let anyone love you?" Aang said with large innocent eyes that made her irate.

Her eyes darkened. "So that's my issue. That I cannot be loved." She said tersely.

He shrugged lackadaisically. Azula wasn't buying it.

"In all your ten-year-old wisdom, that is the conclusion you've reached? I had to walk uphill both ways to kill you, kid- and you still didn't stay dead. Do you think love can _cure _me as well? Hell, I forgot to whom I was speaking. You probably think love can cure anything." Azula's lips were set in a grim, unyielding line. She was completely restrained, yet an undecipherable hint of melancholy glowed in her unblinking eyes.

"It's very possible." He grinned shyly, unrelenting.

"I suppose you think I'm hopeless then." She watched him flick open his glider and take off, soaring around the grand balcony.

"Maybe not!" He called, along with something else that sounded strangely like "just a work in progress". But he had already drifted out over the city.

* * *

><p>Azula returned to her quarters quietly. She swept the make-up off her floor, tore the uneven hangings from the bed, and shoved everything without a proper place into the wardrobe. She fished the last jagged pieces of mirror out from under her vanity amid bouts of coughing and fitted them back together again.<p>

_Why would anyone want to use a cracked mirror? _She wondered as she watched herself, uneven black lines stretched across the glass and marred her reflection, splitting her into asymmetrical subfigures. Her luscious hair was thinning; her eyes sunken and wide, even her long signature nails were gone. _Because everything is more beautiful when it is broken._

* * *

><p>Azula found somewhere else to sleep, her room was feeling musty and in need of redecoration. She was downstairs in the room with a view of the gardens. The lanterns were glowing warmly and swaying in the slight breeze. It was unexplainably silent; everyone had doubtlessly fled to alternate wings of the palace to escape Azula's infernal coughing, which never seemed to end. This stillness both comforted her and suited her purpose perfectly.<p>

Zuko found her, as she suspected he would. The Fire Nation Royal Palace was nearly as nosey as Ba Sing Se in that way, no small detail ever went unreported. He lurked in the shadows for a few moments before getting the nerve to draw closer. Azula was tucked neatly beneath several silk coverlets, arms crossed over her stomach with impeccable poise. She appeared tranquil with her eyes closed.

"Lurking again, Zuzu? It's not a charming habit." He visibly tensed. Azula had always been a light sleeper.

"Just checking up on you." He coughed, belatedly announcing his presence.

"Come closer." She squinted. "I can't see you. I am told I have a few more weeks at this rate, so long as I don't firebend. There's no need for you to be doting on me just yet."

"I'm not." He responded irritably, stepping into the lamp-light.

"That's encouraging." She snorted.

"Azula…" He trailed off, looking down at the woven carpet. "Are you sure you don't want Katara to get…"

"After all I've done to contribute to the destruction of the spirits in the North Pole; they will never be willing to help me. I am a lost cause, and I think you've known it much longer than I have." She closed her eyes slowly; she could barely see anything in the dim light.

"You've always been a cynic, Azula. But not a lost cause…I mean, you were fourteen…"

"And your incurable optimism, although latent, has always been your greatest fault. You cannot deny the facts before you though, and now you have nothing to say." She coughed loudly into a satin handkerchief.

"I'm sorry." He said suddenly. It was the only thing he could think of, and to some extent, he meant it. "I'm sorry you're dying and I'm sorry there's nothing I can do- nothing I can say."

_My old fuddy-duddy uncle was right. _She thought, not lacking enjoyment. She blinked in his general direction several times. "Are you going to apologize for stealing my empire as well?" She asked with a straight-face.

"No, but I am sorry that I burned your life down, even if it was necessary. And I'm sorry that you never got the chance to build it back up again."

"Would you have given me that chance?" She intoned miserably.

Zuko decided that there were some questions better left unanswered.

"If you are asking me to forgive you, I hope you realize you are asking me to lie to you." She croaked. Zuko moved closer to hear her. "I found it amusing and somewhat endearing at first but now it's just pissing me off. This is _my_ deathbed you insufferably selfish bastard, and if I had something to tearfully admit to you, I would have already done it. I wanted to make withholding my forgiveness my last revenge so I could die happily knowing you would wallow in your sorrow for the remainder of your petty life, but since you can't even give me _that_- I will explain.

"There is nothing to forgive. Your delusions of guilt exhaust me, brother. There is nothing you could have done to cause this; there is nothing you could have done to prevent it. Therefore, forgiving you, if I chose to do so, would be a lie that I won't tell for your satisfaction. You were never the one screwing me over anyway." She covered her eyes with a dainty hand, as if hiding him from sight nullified his existence.

"Is all of that true?" He asked; eyes wide. It was, of course. Azula had her own personal brand of sincere that somehow managed to sound scornful and disgusted. "How do I know this isn't like when we were trapped in the cell?"

"I had different motives then. Come closer, it's getting harder to see you." She whispered, eyelids drooping. "I always knew you were a talented firebender." Her bony hand clasped weakly around his arm. "Possibly as good as me."

It sounded like it caused her a great deal of pain to say it, and Zuko couldn't ignore the note of distaste in her words.

"You were just too much of a coward to recognize it yourself." Her lips cracked into a smile. Sokka had said that Azula always smiled, but never with her eyes. Zuko had a terrible sinking feeling that this smile was genuine.

Then she delivered a devastating right hook to the side of his head.

Zuko collapsed into a lifeless heap at her bedside. Azula blew on her knuckles demurely, trying to erase the sting. "Yup." She muttered to herself, springing out of bed. "Still got it."

* * *

><p>Azula emerged from the palace three minutes later wearing lipstick and a heavy layer of white powder that concealed her haggard appearance. She glided across the courtyard like a gentle wind, a wandering ghost. Her heart was beating too quickly, she couldn't quite tell if she was actually nervous or just feeling the effects of the poison. She decided to take anything in the stables she could find. It was dark because the moon had completely waned and no fireflies were flitting about. She hugged her velvet coat closer to her.<p>

"Azula?" Someone called out sharply as she moved by.

Azula turned slowly and Katara let a ribbon of water fall back into the fountain.

"Zuko went to find you." The waterbender told her.

"He did."

"I thought you were too weak to get out of bed." Katara said, always the skeptic. Azula _was _tired…

"I may have bluffed." Azula said bluntly. "Just a little."

"What do you mean?" Katara asked suspiciously, her eyes looked grey and lifeless in the dark.

"I mean that I may have had enough strength left to incapacitate Zuko and possibly enough left over overpower you. If I'm very fortunate." The Water Tribe girl was looking more and more like collateral damage.

"Can I ask you something? Do you have a death wish?" Katara summoned the water from the fountain again.

Azula simply laughed. "Step aside."

"Where are you going?"

"That's not really any of your concern."

Azula figured out what Katara assumed about her plans when she lunged forward and attacked. She just barely rolled out of the way of a blast of freezing water. Gasping, she countered with thin streams of blue lightning. It wouldn't do to kill herself now before she had the chance to-

She just managed to evaporate an explosion of water before it hit her. Lily pads and lotus blossoms fell lifelessly to the ground around them. Katara had one green leaf draped over her head like a bizarre hat, looking completely livid. Azula danced around her, breathing heavily. The waterbender was clearly getting more frustrated with every parry. Even the most experienced warriors could fall victim to their own emotions.

Katara wouldn't defeat her this time. This time Azula had a purpose. She was at a disadvantage but Azula was nothing if not resourceful. What was it Zuko had said? _You always do the unexpected. _What could she do to startle the brat? Then it came to her, as clear as the light of day. She leapt over the edge of the fountain and landed in the brackish water. Cold filled her shoes and soaked her satin leggings. Katara quickly froze the water around her ankles and skated around her. Azula closed her eyes and tried to reach for the fire deep inside her so she wouldn't feel the cold freezing her in place.

"Why? Why would you go back to him? After all the generosity we've shown you-

"You have given me everything you can without losing your own honor." Azula finished for her. "Don't lie to yourself. You always meant to be my captors, not my caretakers." Azula still had her eyes shut, looking unnaturally serene in the dark night. "Because, you know, someone always wants something from me." Azula instantly melted the ice and Katara dropped into the foul water. Before the water bender had a chance to right herself, a surge of electricity spread through to pool and illuminated the entire courtyard before falling dark again.

Katara lay limp over the rim of the fountain. Azula heaved herself over the edge and took off running, trailing droplets of water as she went.

* * *

><p><strong>I am so sorry this took so long to post, unfortunately it may take a while to post the next part. I am in the middle of writing a senior thesis and extremely preoccupied.<strong>

**Azula's wardrobe for this chapter courtesy of Roberto Cavalli (I play Azula dress-up a lot) **

**Please review and tell me what you're thinking!**


	13. Non Serviam

**I often forget to thank my reviewers, so to everyone who has offered me their support, favorited, or subscribed, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. **

**Is Azula resigned to her fate? Perhaps, but I think we can count on her to dramatically tie up some loose ends!**

**So I was reading Hamlet….and this happened. Sorry if it's a little filler-y**

Chapter XIII Non Serviam

_ Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us._ Marianne Williamson

"You think this doesn't frustrate me just as much as you?" Katara fumed, healing the bruise on Zuko's temple for the second time in as many hours. Her hair was frazzled and standing on end.

Zuko said nothing in reply, but the arms of the chair he was gripping cracked under the pressure.

"We have to go after her." Aang said, twirling his staff.

"She can't be moving too fast." Katara nodded. "Maybe we can catch her before she gets to the border…"

"Unless someone came to collect her." Zuko started to shake his head, looking paler by the moment. "Let her do what she wants." He glared at both of them. "I'm done trying to control her."

"But she could-" Aang interjected.

"She can finish her self-destruction on her own." Zuko stood up and walked over to the ever present tactical map.

"But she'll destroy everything else in the process." Katara said quietly.

"It's too late anyway." He said, idly moving one of the red figures closer to the colonies. "We have to invade. It's not ideal, but we'll crush this revolution before it gets out of hand."

Aang cleared his throat. "She's dying Zuko…"

"She weakens every time she uses her bending. She waited until Aang left the palace before making her escape; she knows she can't take him. That move she used on me probably consumed most of her available energy…" Katara insisted, removing her hands from Zuko's rapidly heating face.

"There's no way she's getting out of this alive! She'll choose him anyway!" Zuko shouted, knocking all the figurines over. "Everything she says is empty, for all I know, all of this could have been staged! Maybe there isn't a poison at all! Maybe they have the antidote!"

Katara shook her head, but couldn't find the words to say.

"He's right." Aang said suddenly. "It _was_ her choice, but if we don't do something…" He trailed off. A blanket of pregnant silence threatened to suffocate them.

"So what's our plan?" Katara finally asked.

Zuko bit his lip. Every once in a while it became clear to him just how much his sister strained _all_ of his relationships.

"Katara we don't really make plans…" Aang scratched his shiny head.

"Let's just get this over with." Zuko looked wrecked.

"Fine. I'll go see if I can get Sokka to come with us." The sound of the electric shocks from the carpet followed Katara as she left.

"I'd better go with her. He'll probably need some convincing." Aang made his excuses and side-stepped out.

Zuko laid his head in his hands and closed his eyes.

* * *

><p>"I knew you would return to me." Azula's father rasped. "Like a moth to the flame."<p>

Azula fell to her knees, unsure if she would be able to get back up. She had always been unfortunately devoted to him, even now when he just a shadow of the man he once was. Still, his presence commanded respect and foreboding.

"You know me too well father." Her heart was beating erratically. "I will always be yours."

"We mustn't dwell on what cannot be undone." He shook his head, smiling faintly. "You have come back to me, that is all that matters."

Azula knew this was his way to address that he was responsible for poisoning her (to some extent) without actually addressing it at all. _It doesn't matter whose side I am on._ She reminded herself._ I will die alone either way. _

Another voice she had not heard in a while chimed in unexpectedly. _You were already alone. _

* * *

><p>Sokka, as it turned out, was extremely enthusiastic about subduing Azula again as soon as possible.<p>

Then everything was set in motion.

Zuko organized a small, elite group of warriors.

Toph coordinated with available members of the White Lotus.

Katara prepared Appa for the trip.

It wasn't until then that Aang waited to voice his concerns.

"You mean to tell me," Zuko said, rubbing his scalp with restless finger tips. "That you've known something has been off this entire time?"

"All the rogue spirits lately may be connected. Just yesterday I had to fix one situation. They're breaking free of the Spirit World more often than they used to. The night Ozai escaped-"

"His cell was still locked from the outside." Zuko recalled.

Aang nodded shortly. "There was a spirit wreaking havoc in an Earth Kingdom town that day that drew me away from Capital Island. In other words…"

"Long Feng is meddling with things that should not be meddled with."

Aang nodded again. "So this could end very badly for him-"

"Or it could end exactly how he wants it to." Zuko rested his head in his hands. Spirits were capricious beings. It was impossible to determine which mere mortals they favored, and not all of them were benevolent.

"When did you start finishing each other's sentences?" Toph had appeared in the doorway. "Never mind. Appa is saddled and ready. It's time to go." Toph walked away, she clearly had better things to do.

"Listen, if you can figure out whatever Long Feng has to do with the spirits, I'll take care of the rest." Zuko said in a hush. "She's sick now anyway…"

"Don't underestimate her." Aang reminded him sternly. "Don't ever underestimate her, even if she only has a minute left to live."

"I never have." Zuko said quietly. "I just thought she might change her political stance after everything she used to know was erased. She's always been adaptable…"

"I thought she might be different." The Avatar admitted solemnly.

"Yeah well, I wouldn't put my faith in her." Zuko sighed and looked away. "You should get a head start. Maybe if you get to the leaders first the entire operation will fall apart at the seams." He didn't elaborate.

"I'll try to find the disrupted spirits too. I don't want to make any assumptions, but I think Long Feng could have torn a hole in the barrier between their world and ours." Aang said hesitantly. "It would be a small tear, but still extremely destructive."

"Wonderful." Zuko droned, brushing off his robes.

* * *

><p>Toph rode with Aang. They passed over places they had been in silence.<p>

"I shouldn't have told her to chase what she wants." Toph mumbled.

"It's a good piece of advice." Aang replied after a pause. "What she chose to do is not on you. Besides, you can't have thought she would let Long Feng get the better of her one last time, did you?"

Toph bit her lip and clutched Appa's fur, but let the subject rest.

They arrived by nightfall, the sun had left an eerie purple smudge on the horizon after sinking behind the mountains. Appa flew up and doubled back to land in one of the fields in the outskirts. The fortress was too brightly lit to fly directly into the center. If it was meant to look inviting it was failing horribly. The city looked energized and portending, preparing for an unnamed event.

They agreed to separate temporarily and get a comprehensive situation report. Aang surveyed the situation from the sky on an inconspicuous black glider. An army seemed to be gradually forming in the front yard of the palace.

There was something in the air, literally. It was saturated with spirit activity and it weighed him down like the supernatural swamp had. Aang floated closer, peeking into lit windows. A glimpse at what he was up against would be invaluable. He swooped downward, closer this time. There had to be people loyal to the tradition of the Avatar.

One figure illuminated by the faint light from the dreary castle finally caught his attention; he shrugged mentally and dove forward without a second thought.

* * *

><p>Azula would never tell, but she always liked the tragedies. The victorious tales of protagonists who won honor and glory for their countries and themselves were trite and wrought with unrealistic simplicity. Azula liked the plays where the entire cast had died by the final act, bodies strewn about the stage like inconsequential props while the final character stood to lament their purposeless deaths in a final soliloquy. The notion of one character lurking in the background waiting for everyone to eventually destroy themselves appealed to her. But she never expected to be covered in pig's blood at the end of her act. Suddenly her part didn't seem so inconsequential. The way things were shaping up, Zuko would be the last one standing amongst the corpses, too cowardly to follow their example.<p>

She was no one's queen, and now she never would be.

It hurt to admit, but she was already hurting too much to notice.

She took a shaky breath and dragged her fingertips down her pallid face. It was no use trying to brighten her appearance; the mirror told her the truth.

"I'm dying." Princess Azula whispered. The abstract words escaped from her lips. Shouldn't she feel a sense of urgency uttering them? Instead a sense of calm pervaded her_. That can't be good._ Most people would be rushing to fulfill their final wishes, but she had nothing but patience. It was peculiar, an entirely unfamiliar feeling.

The face that peered back at her was shadowed with unbendable iron bars.

She decided to quickly try and fix her hair with a lion-turtle shell comb before her father came to fetch her. She had to at least look presentable if not normal, like she was before. She was still the daughter of Ozai and her energy hadn't quite left her yet, even if her hands were trembling uncontrollably. Just as she had fixed her hair a blur of orange and blue tumbled through her open window with a loud bang.

Azula was so startled that her brain momentarily short-circuited, she saw the scene before her but did not understand, the ensuing silence was deafening.

"Why would you want to serve a man who signed your death warrant?" The Avatar demanded, aiming his staff at her forehead with steadfast determination. Aang was a bit surprised; he had gotten his point across quite simply. She blinked multiple times before regaining her composure. Aang kept his stern gaze on her the entire time.

"You're not supposed to be here," She mumbled looking around as if she expected someone else to pop out from somewhere unexpected. "You're too early, much too early. I wasn't expecting you for another few hours at least." She elaborated, pulling unfamiliar articles of clothing out of the wardrobe and stuffing them haphazardly into a trunk. He was speechless watching her frantically rearrange the room.

"What are you talking about?" He gripped his staff tighter. She shushed him in response and froze in place.

The unmistakable sound of steel boots on stone was getting louder.

"You have to hide, I'm not done with you yet. Don't make a sound or do anything to announce your presence I will have to flay you. I'm not exaggerating, in fact, that's probably merciful. I have to save face, you understand." She said under her breath, heaving him bodily into the piece of furniture and slamming the door shut. She slid the lock home just as the door to her room opened. _Azula would have a wardrobe that locks. _Aang fumed.

He heard Azula say: "Father. I wasn't expecting you so soon."

"That was a mistake. You must be prepared for anything now." Aang pressed his eye to the crack between the doors in hopes of catching a glimpse of his former arch enemy.

He wasn't disappointed. Aang held his breath as Ozai entered the room, his daughter shut the door behind him with downcast eyes. She didn't want his ubiquitous escort of firebending guards to overhear their conversation. He was nowhere near as mighty as he had been, that was certain. He still dwarfed Azula, who would probably disappear if she turned sideways. She glared pointedly in Aang's general direction just before her father turned around.

"Of course." Azula uttered. "What's our plan father? I cannot stand working with Long Feng for much longer."

"Patience, we shall turn on him soon enough. Once your brother is deposed and his nascent régime is finished you can help me eliminate our fair weather friend." It was an empty promise.

"That could perpetuate the war for decades." Azula said emotionlessly. Aang watched Azula's hands clench behind her back from the narrow keyhole. Everything was slowly coming together in his mind. If Azula was hiding him…

"I will make certain demands. It will be quite simple to pull the rug out from under his feet. He will be my governor, but he won't know it." Her father pushed a strand of her hair away from her face. She couldn't see him clearly through her blurred vision.

"Trust me, my dear. This will end in our favor."

"I am glad." She sounded dissatisfied.

He nodded curtly. "We leave within the hour." Ozai paused momentarily. "I am grateful to you, Azula."

"And I you." She told him with a blank stare. He left with a dramatic flourish. _Like father, like daughter. _

Azula closed the door behind him and stepped backward slowly until she was practically pressed against the wardrobe. As soon as the sound of his boots was gone she ripped the doors open and hauled the Avatar out by the collar.

"Listen twerp." She snarled. "You don't know what you're up against."

"I have a pretty good idea." Aang protested.

"No. You really don't. Long Feng has pissed off a lot of spirits in a very short amount of time. I don't know exactly what they're doing but my father seems to think there is a way to transfer what is left of my power to him. If you can deal with that mess, I'll incapacitate him."

"You knew!"

"Of course."

"About everything!"

"Yes." She peered out the window before shoving his staff into his hand. "I've been playing for your team for at least the past 36 hours. Surprised?" She tilted her head

"You lied. Again. So no, not really." Aang sighed.

Azula's laugh turned into a malicious wheeze. "No, you jumped to conclusions. I wasn't lying, I was changing my mind. It's not the same thing."

"But you want people to think you're bad- you want people to hate you." He hypothesized.

She smirked. "I'm open to interpretation."

"How do I know you're not going to 'change your mind' again?"

"The time for decisions is past." She glanced down. "Goodbye, Avatar."

"Good luck, Princess." He stepped onto the windowsill. He was taking a risk trusting her, but he was feeling optimistic.

"Avatar!" She barked before he could fly away. "Do you… do you know what kind of poison is killing me?" He voice had an edge to it that could have been considered desperation if it was anyone but Azula.

"I checked multiple times. I couldn't find anything." He shook his head. "I may be the Avatar, but even I can't change fate."

"Don't you feel sorry for me." She threatened before he could start looking sad.

"Believe me, you make it practically impossible." He offered her a faint smile and flew out into the night without another thought.

Azula turned around to face her empty room and pushed her hair away from her face.

Dusk had fallen. In the end, this is what it always came down to. She was on her own and trying to find her way in the dark.

She took a deep breath, sat down, and waited for destiny to come and get her.


	14. Sacrificed For a Fair Wind

**A/N: sorry for the wait! you should probably go back and review the old chapters before you read this one. enjoy! (Also, happy belated 100,000 words archived to me! Look at my life! Look at my choices!)**

**Chapter XIV Sacrificed for a Fair Wind**

You can't even begin to know

How many times I've told myself 'I told you so'

And you can't even begin to believe

There are so many bridges engulfed in flames behind me.

I Was Once a Loyal Lover, Death Cab For Cutie

* * *

><p>Everything turned on its axis. Every piece of furniture slid into the wall as the foundations of the building moaned. Destiny was calling. Azula steadied herself.<p>

Her brother had launched his final offensive and she had loose ends that needed tying up. If Zuko and his friends didn't win this fight, she didn't think there would be another. She knew speculation regarding her future status would be pointless as well.

She willed herself not to tremble and opened the door just as the rock palace shifted again. Her feet were numb, she could only sense them connecting with the stones beneath her. The distinct rumble of a bending battle emanated from somewhere below her, but she was not deterred. For now, that was none of her concern.

She twisted the ring around her finger three times and walked faster. She practically flew down the steps to the next level.

"Hey Azula! Azula!" Someone shouted behind her. "AZULA!" She didn't turn back.

"What are you doing here." She closed her eyes momentarily and bit her lip so hard she tasted blood. She couldn't look back.

"Aang told me about your plan. I'm making sure you honor your end of the arrangement." Sokka caught up with her, clutching his side.

"I have it under control." She told him shortly. If he noticed the subtle break in her voice he gave no indication.

"Ha! I wish I could believe you."

"My father will be in a confined space surrounded by guards. Now that he… he can't you know- bend anymore they are always close by." She massaged her temples restlessly. It was getting more difficult to focus and she couldn't think straight when Sokka was there distracting her. "When he sees me he'll call them off. I don't need you. Go back to where you came from. " A violent cough shook her slight frame. Rubble came loose from the ceiling. "I have to do this. On my own." She specified.

Sokka didn't say anything for a long time. Azula did her best to ignore him. The silence was deafening. "What no witty comment?" She rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry Azula." He said quietly.

"Don't apologize, it's a sign of weakness."

"I'm not apologizing, it's an expression. I'm telling you how I feel."

"That's even more pointless."

What had he meant? I'm sorry for you? I'm sorry this happened to you? I'm sorry I didn't see this side of you before? Of course he didn't. He didn't see what she saw in the mirror.

"Do you even have a plan?"

"Yes, but it's a simple one. Things are about to get ugly." Azula informed him. She couldn't look back.

"What do you mean?" She let silence speak for her. "No, Azula-" He protested, "You're being irrational."

"Am I?" She intoned.

"I can't let you die Azula, you're my responsibility!"

"I'm letting you off the hook." She croaked.

"We have to get out of here before it collapses! Long Feng has opened up some kind of portal in the caves under the castle…Aang says it's very unstable and it could collapse at any time. I'm not leaving."

She still wouldn't look at him. He reached out to stop her but ended up spinning her around instead. She lost too much weight in the past few weeks and he underestimated his strength. He grabbed her shoulders like she was a naughty kid who needed a shake. She looked so frustrated that for one terrifying moment he thought she was going to hurt him. Yet she still refused to look up.

"No one believes in me." She whispered, her eyes were widened as if she couldn't believe what she was saying. "I need someone to believe in me. There's really nothing else anyone can do. I know when I am beaten but I also know that I can do this." She looked up at him slowly, her eyes were red rimmed and angry. "I'm not asking you to trust me, I'm asking you to take a leap of faith. Do you understand." The building gave another violent shake. She didn't even give him a second to reply before she started off down the hall again. It seemed like it always came down to this, Azula running away and Sokka chasing after her- like staying in one place for long was impossible for her.

"Yeah whenever I do you a favor you make me regret it." He glared at her back, but he followed her anyway. It wasn't the first time they had run down these halls together but he had a feeling it would be the last. A heavily guarded door soon came into view; Azula straightened her posture and put on a commanding façade.

"Where are you going Princess?" One of the faceless benders uttered.

"I'm here to see my father."

"He has given explicit orders not to be disturbed."

Azula scowled at the guard for a few seconds.

"But I'm sure he'll make an exception." He stuttered, hastily opening the door and admitting her. "Who's he?" He said nervously.

She didn't deign to reply. "Everybody get the hell out." She bellowed, storming into the cavernous room. Ozai had his back turned to her and did not acknowledge her arrival.

"But Princess-"

"I don't need to explain myself to you. There's a battle going on, we need reinforcements. And I wish to speak to my father alone." She spat, as if showing them exactly what she thought of her patriarch.

"What about…?" The soldiers peered over suspiciously at Sokka.

"He's not a human, he's a savage. OUT." She shouted again. Ozai turned his head and nodded slightly. The mercenaries filed out obediently.

"I wondered if it would come to this." He said darkly, turning to face her.

"Did you honestly think I would come back to you?" Her voice was as clear and as sharp as ice. "That I would still be loyal to you after you _poisoned me_?" Azula hissed.

"You're still wearing my ring." He observed, smiling faintly. "You're more loyal than you give yourself credit for."

"This place is about to crash down around you, Father, along with your stupid scheme. Long Feng has damned himself and he's unleashed the vengeance of the spirit world on us. It's too late. It's over." Azula's heart was beating like a drum and an unnaturally strong gust of wind made the foundations creak.

"What are you still doing here then? What do you want?" Ozai narrowed his eyes.

Azula swallowed. "Why?" She breathed. "Why would you…?" She paused to gain control of her breathing but she didn't need to finish her sentence.

"You were a necessary sacrifice. Collateral damage." Her father was completely emotionless.

Azula inhaled sharply. She was just as disposable as Zuko after all. "Daddy, you bastard." She said quietly. Azula snatched Sokka's sword, this time he let her. "On your knees." She demanded.

Ozai laughed, but he complied. She struggled to secure her grip on the heavy blade, Ozai didn't stop laughing. "You're not going to hurt me, Azula."

"You don't know anything about me." In one swift movement she brought the blunt hilt of the heavy sword down on his skull. The once mighty Fire Lord crumpled and blood spattered over the green tiles. "Watch him. Make sure he doesn't get back up." Azula whispered forcefully, passing the sword back to Sokka. She felt like she was going to faint. She rubbed her face and blood smeared across her left cheekbone. Suspicious moisture was smeared beneath her eyelashes.

His blue eyes went wide in realization. "Look Azula-"

"Where are they?" She gasped, clutching her side. "Zuko… Long Feng…" Was this what it felt like to lose control the first time? She closed her eyes for an infinitesimal moment and listened to the reassuring beat of her unreliable heart. She was still real, and she still had things to accomplish.

"Slow down." He was afraid she was going to fall, but he didn't want to touch her. "I realize you have a one-track mind, but I don't think you know what you're getting into."

"I don't fear the spirits and I'm not so great at self-preservation, but I'm not an idiot." She composed herself and focused all her energy on getting out of the room. "Tell me where they are."

"There's only so much I can protect you from." He muttered.

"And there's only so much you can survive." She paused for a moment to look smug. "You should leave."

"What will I tell your brother?"

"Nothing." She shrugged her aching shoulders. She glanced over at her father's immobile form. "Make sure he doesn't go anywhere."

"He won't." Sokka said darkly. "Last I heard Zuko and Katara were going to bombard the throne room; Long Feng was using it as a stronghold. It isn't anymore, if these tremors are any indication."

The princess nodded curtly, took a deep shuddering breath, and pushed through the doors, leaving Sokka in a hollow room with an unconscious dictator.

Against his better judgment, Sokka approached the man who was once Lord Ozai. A couple demanding nudges with a steel toed boot made him slowly open his eyes.

"Do you value your honor?" Sokka practically shouted, glaring at Ozai's pathetic figure on the floor.

"What?" He growled, wiping blood out of his eyes.

"Do you value your honor?" Sokka repeated, raising his sword. "Because that girl, your daughter, just passed up a chance to avenge her murder by choosing to let you continue your existence. She wasn't lying, you know- your offensive really has been defeated and tomorrow, you'll just be the pathetic guy responsible for two failed world domination schemes. I would come up with some witty nicknames, for you but I'm too angry at the moment." Sokka took Zuko's dagger from its sheath and offered it to Ozai hilt first. "So why don't you do yourself a favor, and end this now?"

* * *

><p>AN: I AM SO SORRY! I have been so busy these past few months, like SO BUSY. Please drop me a **review** to let me know you're still there!


	15. Mutually Assured Destruction

**So. I finally sucked it up and wrote this. For some stupid reason it actually took me a while to work up the courage to post this. Couldn't have written it without your support, seriously, you guys gave me the motivation to continue. **

**Chapter XV Mutually Assured Destruction**

_Fire, water and governments know nothing of mercy. (Albanian proverb)_

So this is how it began, and this is how it ends; in blood and fire, ash and smoke. Azula thought. Her expression showed nothing but cruel determination; although in the back of her mind she regretted not keeping Sokka's sword to use as a cane. The palace was eerily quiet now; the rumbling foundations had faded into distant vibrations. Maybe they had all killed each other and made her last hours a bit easier. It was a comforting thought, albeit a brief one.

Because whatever happened would all be her fault, in the end. (According to _them_.)

Maybe she deserved the blame; this entire fiasco had been forced by her hand, after all. Although she would never regret that. Necessary measures never entail guilt.

_What a conundrum, too great to die, too terrible to live. _A voice mentioned from the periphery of her consciousness. It sounded vaguely like Li or Lo, she couldn't be sure. What had happened to them anyway? Not that it mattered, really.

Azula figured this would be like the last time she lost herself, with hallucinations and traumatic emotion induced blackouts. She waited for the delirium, the loss of control, the distorted visions of hazy memories, but in the end none of them emerged.

At least she had that left- lucidity and the knowledge that she was still Princess Azula of the House of Agni: the rising sun, the First of her name, Dynasty of Sozin and Daughter Ozai. His signet ring weighed heavier now, more than ever.

The closer she got to the throne room, the more intense the earthquakes became. The enormous green granite pillars cracked and shook like a death knell. Her ears started ringing and mouth tasted like raw metal. The atmosphere was still saturated with the distinct abnormality that marked an intrusion of spirits into the human world. She shuddered when she realized her father had wanted to harness the power of those spirits in order to drain the last of her bending …and she probably would have let him.

Azula faced the doors to the room where she had sat on the throne and took several deep, gasping breaths. She had defeated Long Feng in this room once before, she had the upper hand- she knew she wasn't going to fail, not this time.

This time, all the breathing exercises she had internalized returned to her naturally. She grasped the energy she had managed to preserve these few weeks and when she found her balance, she walked directly into the center of the fight.

It took a few moments, but eventually someone noticed. Balls of fire disintegrated, slabs of earth ceased shifting, and an abandoned wave swept across the floor and over Azula's unfazed feet.

_Get out of here._ She gave Zuko and the waterbending girl an intense glare as she walked past, maybe they would be smart enough to leave.

Her interruption allowed everyone to simultaneously glance at Long Feng, who appeared to be the object of her attention. No one seemed to know whose side she was on at that moment.

"Ah, Princess Azula." Long Feng said after a moment of consideration, tucking his hands into his long sleeves. His confidence was unfounded- he evidently thought he was winning. "I see you're still with us."

"I couldn't think of leaving before our arrangement was fulfilled." Her voice was sharp and forceful.

Zuko stood frozen as she approached Long Feng; she was stepping through the puddles on the floor and climbing over displaced rocks like they didn't exist. The hair stood up on the back of his neck.

"I'm afraid you won't be with us when our goal is achieved, Princess." Long Feng replied with false remorse.

She laughed.

Her arms were suddenly engulfed in blue flames.

More than one person had to suppress the instinctual urge to run away immediately.

"You and me… we've always had the most amusing conversations." She ruminated, smirking maniacally. The flames reached for Long Feng, his eyes widened and he stumbled backward. "But the most amusing thing is that you never fail to forget the most important thing about me. That _I am a liar_. And that _always_ makes me _an unpredictable wild card_."

Then, without warning, the throne room imploded.

Everyone in the vicinity was violently thrown against the walls as an iridescent pillar of fire consumed Long Feng and the Princess of the Fire Nation. Everyone was too shocked to notice what happened to the roof, but suddenly it was gone. The failed tyrant blackened, turned to ash, and dispersed before their eyes, but Azula didn't stop.

Only Zuko recognized it for what it was, he had encountered multicolored fire once before. He recalled the epiphany he experienced when he realized that firebending was not destruction, but _energy and life_.

"_She's draining her life force_." He shouted as the illustrious walls crumbled around them. In that moment, he knew she wouldn't be able to stop.

Katara pulled herself to her feet and they both ran, escaping the thick walls of the main palace into the courtyard.

For several terrifying minutes, all of Ba Sing Se watched the spectrum of color created by the fire consuming the citadel.

When Azula finally collapsed, the walls collapsed with her.

* * *

><p>On the morning of the second day, when the cloud of dust had settled, King Kuei was located. The entire capital was relieved that the line of succession was no longer in question, and representatives of all notable political groups moved to restore him to his rightful place. Major world leaders were confined in makeshift military tents for the foreseeable future, drawing up and signing treaties and statutes.<p>

No one had time to contemplate the Princess' death, or what it meant.

"What did she say to you?" Katara asked her brother when she found him scrubbing blood out from underneath his nails. He simply shook his head in response.

Citizens began the extensive process of clearing away the rubble and searching for survivors.

On the evening of the second day, a child was found alive in the crawlspace of the wreckage. Three corpses were found shortly thereafter.

One of them was Ozai, apparently stabbed to death before his body was crushed beneath several tons of ancient rock.

Everyone else seemed to have gotten out alive, with minimal casualties.

Aang had successfully closed the vortex that allowed spiritual activity to seep into their world. Iroh had assisted him. But the residual energy left in the air continued to make everyone uncomfortable.

The city was in a permanent state of exhaustion. Everything was being mended 24 hours a day. New agreements were rewritten and signed in the wee hours of the morning, healers were working 36 hour shifts, and volunteers from all socioeconomic backgrounds were looking for survivors and repairing the redeemable sections of the palace.

On the evening of the third day, a commotion started at the epicenter of the destruction. A filthy child from the lower ring sprinted half a mile down the hill to their makeshift camp and nearly fell at Zuko's feet, panting.

"The princess! We found the princess, I think she's _breathing_!" The streetrat yelled eagerly between gasps. Zuko vaulted up the hill to the top of the debris, wading through the crumbled stone to where a few people had gathered.

Azula's limp body was draped over the ruins of the palace, glowing faintly blue. Someone was kneeling beside her, one hand on her forehead to keep her steady, the other on her neck to check her pulse.

Her eyes were closed, but her cracked lips were barely but unmistakably moving.

Zuko leaned down tentatively, not daring to breathe.

"Wake me up." She whispered. "Wake me up, someone, please, wake me up."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thank you guys for leaving me reviews and giving me the motivation to write this part! Before you call me out and tell me that she couldn't have survived under all that rock, you should assume some supernatural forces were at work ;) **

**And unfortunately, Azula's still not out of the woods. there's still the small issue of the unidentifiable poison. Bear with me, there will be a big revelation in two more chapters (they're going to be long.)**

***If I haven't explained something you think needs explaining in the next few chapters, please drop me a line, I don't want to leave anything out.* **


	16. Carpe Diem

**I'm shifting the omniscient . away from Azula-centric for a while in this chapter to show her emotional distance from her situation. Also, I had to add some random back story for this to make sense (bear with me) p.s. I'm a fan of Sokkla undertones. **

**Chapter XVI Carpe Diem**

_Anarchy—show me a greater crime in all the earth! She, she destroys cities, rips up houses, breaks the ranks of spearmen into headlong rout. But the ones who last it out, the great mass of them owe their lives to discipline. Therefore we must defend the men who live by law, never let some woman triumph over us. Better to fall from power, if fall we must, at the hands of a man—never be rated inferior to a woman, never. (Antigone, 751–761)_

* * *

><p>"How is she?"<p>

"Zuko..."

"You can tell me."

"Not good. To give her a couple of days is... generous."

"I understand." Zuko sighed before turning around to face Katara. "I think I have to bring her home to the capital. She seems adamant and I can't…" She spared him from finishing that sentence.

Katara nodded, the beads in her hair clicked together. "All the vital things are out of the way, we can postpone everything else. The other delegations will understand."

"Will they?" The Fire Lord wondered.

"They'll have to. You should see about getting an air ship for tomorrow morning. I'll be staying here for a few more days but you should go as soon as possible. Two days have already past." Her grave tone implied that two days was too long.

To everyone's astonishment, Azula's first coherent demand was that Sokka be brought to her. No one dared question her. Zuko had parted the flaps of the tent, glancing at his friend with blatant concern. Sokka wrung his hands anxiously before stepping inside. Zuko suppressed his curiosity for the moment and was promptly distracted by Iroh.

Azula's condition seemed to have worsened. Her eyes were heavy lidded, and her slender neck tilted as though it could not support the weight of her head anymore. Azula's body was failing her; she looked like a corpse long dead. Sokka sat beside her for a few minutes, stroking the bones of her forearm as though it would return the heat to her skin. She woke up suddenly, visibly struggling to identify anything familiar about her surroundings. Sokka tried to awkwardly adjust his position, but she just grasped his hand and pulled him closer.

"Is he dead?" She rasped, voice barely audible.

"Yes." He replied, more steadily than he had expected.

She paused for a moment, her ring pierced his skin.

"You can't tell." She mumbled, licking her blanched lips.

"What?" He said, leaning closer.

"Even when I'm gone you can't tell anyone." She ordered. It dawned on her that she should never have given him this to hold over her in the first place.

"You want me to spite you." He surmised.

"Technically, I want you to want to spite me." She told him candidly.

"You're trying to use me as a pawn." He observed. "This is one of your reverse psychology mind games."

"Yes it is." She replied cryptically. That infuriating smirk splayed on her lips once more.

"If I wanted to spite you, I could just tell them that you couldn't do it." He said with more venom than intended. "After you gave Zuko so much shit for not standing up to Ozai, for being too merciful, too soft, in the end you couldn't even rise to your own taunt-"

"Stop." She croaked, releasing his hand. He must have detected the note of genuine sorrow in her voice because he obeyed. Azula turned away from him gradually.

He fled like her sickness was contagious.

Zuko looked up momentarily from his conversation to see Sokka leave in the opposite direction.

Zuko's initial reaction to discovering Azula still alive had been quite spectacular. Instead of crying or fainting like a normal person, he had firebent the shit out of everything that was unfortunate to get in his way for a couple of hours. While this response was startling, Sokka's was far more interesting. Once he was out of sight he had thrown up several times.

"I think I'm losing it. Your sister has it in for me." He had said, smiling solemnly from his position on the floor. "I would feel victimized, but apparently the entire universe has it in for her."

Once the initial aftermath had died down and people realized she was still dying, it was business as usual. Zuko worked quickly to secure the political situation before he could return home. Meanwhile, Azula was content to sit on a sunny balcony, subsisting on lemon water and herbal tea.

After an extensive discussion with the newly reappointed King Kuei about his imminent re-coronation and setting the statutes for decolonization, he finally boarded the airship awaiting him.

Iroh said goodbye, and assured him that he would hold down the fort. "There is something else I would like to mention." Iroh muttered, glancing pointedly at Azula, who was being loaded onto the air ship. "I've always had suspicions." Iroh was saying conspiratorially "Azula is an anomaly, and exceptional bender. She could always bend blue fire… When they found her alive, she was glowing blue."

"I admit that's a little abnormal, but why is it significant?" Zuko wondered.

"What color is spirit magic?"

"It's… blue."

"Exactly." Iroh nodded.

"So what does that mean?"

"I'm not entirely sure she survived that crash because of _luck_." Iroh shrugged, patted him on the shoulder, and left.

* * *

><p>"We have to stop in Kyoshi for unscheduled maintenance. This is the best ship we could get on short notice, but it's old and doesn't function as efficiently as it used to." Zuko informed his sister, stooping over her.<p>

"That seems wise." She wheezed, gasping for air in vain. "Let's do that."

The altitude had done a number on Azula's already struggling lungs and she was looking rather gray.

* * *

><p>Suki's estranged father had died, leaving her an estate just 15 minutes from the center of town in Kyoshi. It held no sentimental value for her at all, her parents had separated when she was small and her father had been a tentative entity in her life for a very long time. She hardly knew what to do with it; it was much too big to live in all by herself. Sokka offered to stop traveling around so much and help her settle in. "What else are boyfriends for besides lifting heavy things?" He had insisted. He had stayed for the allotted two weeks, and then he never left.<p>

Even when Sokka was actually there, the two of them still only occupied the sparsely furnished attic that could have easily been partitioned into three rooms. There were still two empty floors beneath them, void of any inhabitants and full of furniture covered with sheets. There was a dirt cellar full of stolen Fire Nation antiques that had been coveted by Earth Kingdom nobles during the war as a sign of wealth and power. Kyoshi Island had been a smuggling drop off point for decades. She knew her father had been involved with some sketchy business deals, but not to what extent. She didn't know what to do with this inventory either. Selling it felt dirty, and shipping everything back to its origin was too much of a hassle, too risky. She figured she would just notify Zuko of its existence and if he wanted to pick it up, he would send someone.

Ty Lee was the first to grace their doorstep about a month after they had moved in. The man she had been living with for nearly a year had finally tired of her. She was sobbing with abandon, using the hem of her skirt to blow her cherry red nose and trying to incoherently explain her situation to Suki. After a few moments of suffering through the earsplitting wails of the lugubrious young woman, Suki had ushered her inside. Sokka had been reluctant at first, as he always was with the affably devious acrobat.

She had spent a few days silently moping, lying on the cool tile floor. Ty Lee had immediately perked up when Suki suggested that she could stay with them. She could choose from any of the five bedrooms and have it all to herself for as long as she wanted. Then, in exaggerated show of gratitude, she had begun to bake a plethora of pink cupcakes and pastries. Sokka warmed up to her very quickly after that. He went to get her stuff from her ex-boyfriend and even managed to forcibly obtain custody of her pet marmoset. Ty Lee's tears had recommenced and she had thrown her arms around him with stark enthusiasm. Sokka had blushed slightly and awkwardly patted the top of her head. Suki had grinned and shook her head.

The house baffled Suki. Why fate had caused her to stumble across it and why the universe had stuck her with it was completely beyond her comprehension. Domesticity was something she never thought would happen to her. It had been a nice dream, but always just that: a dream. Now she was living with Sokka, she planted fire lilies in their garden when she had free time, and they even had a pseudo-daughter in the person of Ty Lee.

The first floor quickly turned into a frat-house with Ty Lee living there. Suki thought about being angry at her former enemy when the parties she hosted lasted well into the night. She thought about being angry when she woke up to find her lawn littered with empty glass bottles and her cabinets void of any food. In the end she would always sigh and let it go. At least they were getting more use out of the house than she ever could on her own.

Perhaps the house had become a sort of metaphor for her life; it was, after all, just a big empty space she felt the need to fill.

As soon as the princess stepped over the threshold into their home, Suki knew that she was dying. She froze in place; she hardly knew what to say. Azula didn't recognize them, and Suki thought perhaps she didn't recognize her either.

The sinister girl who had once been her dangerously savvy opponent had been replaced by wraith that moved as though she was weightless. She seemed engrossed by shadows; her eyes had faded to a dull ochre color and bruises covered her transparent skin. Azula's once lithe and fit firebender's body had become thin and frail beneath her cloak. Her cheekbones stuck out more prominently than they ever had before, causing the moonlight to cast dark shadows across her face. She looked defiant as always, but this time her countenance reflected a trace of melancholy. She had her arms wrapped around herself as though the warm climate offered her no comfort and her shoulder blades stuck out from her hollow back like broken wings. She glanced at Suki, and then the former princess had collapsed onto one of their chairs with skeletal elegance.

She's always cold; her blood runs like half-frozen sludge in her veins. It scares her and it scares everyone. "Maybe you can't firebend, but you can give everyone you touch frostbite." Sokka smiles halfheartedly. Azula just starts coughing.

Suki was not sure if she was scared of her or scared for her.

"She's not going to harm anyone, she can't." Zuko had reassured her quietly.

Suki believed him without hesitation.

Azula was impossibly weak now; just walking took a great deal of effort.

Every bone in the arm she was using to prop up her head was visible as she was blatantly ignoring their conversation. Suki sat on the edge of her seat as Zuko explained her mysterious illness.

Ty Lee had burst inside when she came back from training, eager to see their visitors from the Fire Nation. As soon as she spotted Azula, her animated expression shattered. Twelve years ago she had given all her faith to this girl who had now withered away beyond recognition. She had fallen to her knees beside the ghost that had once been Princess Azula.

"Azula I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for everything, I never should have… Azula please, I'm sorry. Please look at me. Azula?" Tears sprung into Ty Lee's eyes. "How could this happen?" Azula ignored her, she didn't even acknowledge her presence. She was paralyzed; her lips were staunchly held in a grim line, her eyes showed no sign of recognition. Ty Lee held her hand and cried, she begged for a word, a glance, any form of acknowledgement.

"Give up, Ty Lee. It doesn't matter. She'll be dead soon anyway." Zuko exhaled loudly. Ty Lee's sobs only increased in frequency and volume.

"Zuko…" Suki began hesitantly.

"What? It's not an insult to say she's dying, she obviously is." He grumbled.

Suki gently pulled Ty Lee off the ground and peeled her away from Azula.

"You want to know why I think this is happening to you Azula?" Zuko asked, his blatant bitterness was hard to overlook.

Azula met his loathing glare equally. "Karma." Judging by everyone's silence, she had guessed correctly.

Suki made her bid to escape at that point, coaxing Ty Lee down the hallway to her room. She sat there while Ty Lee likely cried herself to dehydration.

Eventually the young woman had exhausted herself and fell into a fitful sleep. Suki had smoothed her light brown curls out over the pillow. Given the chance, Ty Lee would cling to whoever offered their arm.

Suki wearily drifted into the living room, it was early in the morning and she didn't see any point in going to bed now. Out of the corner of her eye she saw the shadows shift. Even now, Azula's laughter still echoed in her head. "Game's over girls!" She had called to them as the iron bars of the prison had closed behind her and her warriors. Now the same girl was reclined on the chaise lounge as though she had been waiting for her.

"You're awake?" Suki blurted without fully meaning to.

"I don't actually sleep anymore. I don't think I'll wake up if I do, and I would like to see the Capital again. I want to be close to our father when I die, perhaps I will be able to make an offering at his tomb just once." Azula closed her eyes to the steely morning light and pressed her lips together stoically.

She was shocked by the princess' irrational, unyielding devotion to a man who had never done her much good anyway. She could never fathom doing anything similar for her father. Something in Azula's tone frustrated her though.

"I apologize if Zuko timed this little visit badly; I assure you I had nothing to do with it."

Suki gritted her teeth. "Zuko doesn't owe you anything."

She felt Azula staring at her in the dark, and she moved closer so she could do the same. "He is taking me home to die. To an extent, he blames the disintegration of our family on himself and he always will. If this relieves his conscience then I am happy to oblige." She started to cough once more. "Was there something you wanted?" She inquired hoarsely.

Suki froze and looked down at the younger woman who was looking up at her with appraising eyes. Otherwise Azula looked empty, like there was nothing that held her to this world any longer besides a few lingering bones and bits of sinew. The Kyoshi warrior fought the urge to shiver.

"There's no need for you to look so conflicted when you look at me. Yes, I've noticed. You are very easy for me to read. You can feel sorry for me, it's alright. I grant you my permission, although that may not be any consolation coming directly from me."

"You're right, it's not." Suki paused and Azula tilted her head to the side inquisitively, raising an eyebrow in the potent silence. She quickly resolved to turn the tables on the haughty princess. "Do you always assume that people want something from you?"

"I wouldn't be alive today if it weren't true. Someone always wants something from me."

"What does Zuko want from you?"

"Something to fix." She says hoarsely. "He thinks I need to be redeemed." She emitted a bitter laugh. "I've never done a good thing in my life. Except maybe keep him out of prison, but even that was for selfish reasons. He was such a convenient scapegoat." Azula shook her head and started coughing.

Suki stiffly stood above her. "Can I get you anything?" It was more of a reflex than a genuine offer.

"Don't bother." Azula grumbled.

"What does it feel like?" Suki asked her tentatively, retrieving a cup of water anyway.

"I feel numb, and I'm constantly fighting vertigo- like the universe is trying to make me lose my grip on solid ground. I've had a headache for so long I forget I have one most of the time. And that's just the start. It'll be over soon anyway. Hopefully I'll be reincarnated within the week so I can continue bothering you people. " Azula smirked.

Suki fought back another shiver. Because Azula _would_. That scenario was entirely plausible and it freaked her out. "I'm not happy you're sick. But I was kind of hoping it would make you humble." Suki placed the cup of water on the coffee table in an attempt to conceal her unease.

"I may be wealthy and shameless, but I'm not terminally selfish." Azula declared, like it was important for Suki to understand.

"I know, Azula. But you're very convincing." Suki sighed and walked away, maybe a couple hours of sleep would delay her impending exhaustion headache.

* * *

><p>They spend the morning casting furtive glances in Azula's direction like she was an unstable corrosive rapidly approaching critical mass. Well- more so than normal, anyway.<p>

Azula took a moment to wonder why the universe was so cruel to her.

It wasn't supposed to end like this.

It was supposed to end like she had planned it, with the dramatic explosion and the memorable exit and an ensuing tribute to a worthy opponent. She wasn't supposed to _still _be alive a week later, _still_ incredibly sick and living on the charity of her old enemies.

She thought she recalled being dead for a brief albeit undefinable time, but something had hauled her out of some kind of bizarre post-modern wasteland and vomited her back into reality. It wasn't a pleasant experience, hence why she suspected the universe hated her. If she had restored balance to the spiritual energy spectrum or whatever the fuck they were they were calling it these days, then there was _no reason_, literally _no reason_ for…

Azula took a deep breath; this line of thought wasn't productive. It was her one-track mind, her intense focus that had gotten her this far. Stop and replace.

She opened her eyes. Everyone had made themselves scarce. She vaguely remembered a technician dropping by to let them know the ship would be ready in a few hours. Suki had taken Zuko to see her collection of stolen antiques. (She tried not to dwell on that because _what?_) She had yet to see Ty Lee… which was for the best- she was feeling vindictive and irrational this morning.

Queue Sokka, shuffling into the adjacent kitchen with a plate piled with pastry and a bowl of produce from the garden.

They had a garden. How quaint.

"Suki tells me you want to continue terrorizing us via reincarnation." He said casually.

"Yes that's the plan." She replied.

"That's not a bad contingency plan, it's good to have one."

She rolled her eyes and they lapsed into silence easily.

"Are you scared Azula?" Sokka asked.

It took her a moment to realize why the question had startled her so much- it was because he was the first one who had bothered to ask. Everyone else had been asking if she was alright when she was clearly not. Everyone else had been asking if she needed anything when nothing they could give her had any value. No one had asked her what it actually felt like to be young and dying, taking one last look at the world knowing that soon, none of it would even matter.

"The truth." He added.

"Sometimes." She admitted quietly. "Perhaps what I'm most afraid of is becoming irrelevant. But mostly I'm just relieved. I haven't been able to rest in a very long time… It feels like time is slipping into chaos… every hour could be my last. I can't sleep."

"Can you promise me something?" He wondered.

"You ask a lot of a dying girl."

"Don't die in my house. Suki and I just moved in and I don't want your ghost haunting me constantly."

"On my honor as under fear of death, I promise not to die in your home, Sokka of the Water Tribe." She said with sarcastic decorum. "Although I can't promise I won't haunt you constantly."

An engine started somewhere in the distance. Zuko opened the door suddenly. "Let's go." He addressed Azula before running back out to the airship.

Azula inhaled sharply and heaved herself out of the chair. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Ty Lee lurking in the shadows near the hallway entry. Her eyes were tilted downward and slightly swollen, unruly strands of hair broke free from her braid. She had probably been standing there for a while. Azula did her best to ignore her. It wasn't a difficult task. Azula was mostly focused on walking outside without falling.

"Somebody get me an empire class airship so I can blow this hellhole." She groused, latching onto a table for support.

"I named them that, you know. Airships." Sokka approached her and silence and subtlety guided her to the door. She had her misgivings, but surprised herself when she realized that she was past caring. She grabbed his arm and used him like a lanky interactive cane.

"Genius." She deadpanned. He rolled his eyes beside her. "Hey." She started again. "I need you to do something for me." He groaned. "Dying girl's last wish." She argued.

"Are you seriously playing the 'I'm dying' card?"

"Look after her." She continued, disregarding his quip.

"Who?" Sokka said surprised looking back toward the house. He turned to face her quickly when he suddenly realized to whom she was referring. "You mean Ty Lee?"

"The little shit needs it." Azula nodded curtly.

He hesitated. "Sure- but I'm doing it for her."

"Whatever." She said. "Whatever your reasons, I just want to make sure you know it's your responsibility."

Sokka nodded once. He had known for a while. He glanced at her inquiringly, but she continued to shuffle forward with a determined expression.

"Also," She started as they approached the airship, "don't come to my funeral."

"What? And miss the party?"

"Shut up." She rolled her eyes. "Zuzu will probably just hush this up anyway. No one wants to publicly acknowledge the royal fuck-up."

"Stop. Don't say things like that." He shook his head and lifted her onto the deck like a rag doll. Azula settled onto the ledge and clutched the lower railing.

She looked down at him momentarily, her brow was furrowed in confusion. "I spent a lot of time trying to get people to like me. I tried… everything. It never quite worked and I guess I just gave up. But you have a good reason to hate me and I don't think you do. I don't understand." Her gaze was focused on her dangling feet.

"Do you think we could have been friends?" He asked tentatively.

"No." She replied without a moment's contemplation.

He laughed. "Well at least you're being honest."

"Rulers don't have friends. Everyone is aware of that. If there were enough left of me to give to you, perhaps I would have. If there were a piece of me left I had control over… ah, I see I'm in the rambling retrospection stage of death." She shook her head wryly and hauled her legs onto the deck.

"Can you do something else for me?" Sokka wondered.

She used the railing to stand up as the engine began to roar in earnest, and quirked an eyebrow in his direction.

"Stop lying to Zuko." He requested with pleading eyes and what was meant to be a comforting smile.

Azula sighed. "Telling the truth is messy and impractical. Lies are simple and painless; things just generally work out better when you lie. Especially if your opponents are ignorant idiots who believe in the power of telling the truth. I can't believe I still have to explain my reasoning after all this time."

"Try not to be too insufferable!" He called as the airship shifted upward.

"You too." Azula said. Her hair swept in front of her face as the airship took off, and he watched her disappear into the noon sun.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: OH THE PATHOS! I **_**just**_** finished this, and now I am free to go on vacation! **

**So, you should really drop me a review because it's my birthday and I really want to know what you thought about the odd details in this and the stuff you liked about it and the stuff that was maybe unclear! Thanks for stopping by!**


	17. If You Cannot Be Both

Chapter XVII "If You Cannot Be Both"

**Non-compliant with ****The Search**** (I take issue with The Search), but I do allude to it. **

"It is better to be feared than loved, **if you cannot be both**." Machiavelli

* * *

><p><em>I regret to inform you that my sister, Princess Azula, died earlier today. Given the delicate nature of this situation, there will be no public funeral but rest assured that…<em>

Zuko sighed and threw the note into the brazier beside his desk. He had already burned through dozens of drafts, all of them equally trite, insincere, and generally inappropriate. There was no formula for announcing your sister's death to world leaders while simultaneously apologizing for her existence. He didn't want to do that anyway.

Earlier that day Azula requested to be brought to the royal crypt, where she would ultimately be interred. It was easier that way, she insisted.

He wasn't sure he would go see her there, laid out like she was already dead, one arm crossed over her chest like the imperial queens of old. He looked out his panorama window to where the sun was just setting over the Coronation Temple. She would be dressed in white, the customary Fire Nation color for death, and coughing blood all over it no doubt.

"She wants to see you." Katara said primly. He turned to face her. She looked grim.

"What did she say to you?" He asked.

"Nothing that matters." She replied, confirming his suspicion. "You'd better go now. She won't last the night. I'm brewing potions like crazy and we're still trying to dig something up from the archives, anything that may be medically useful. What are you doing?" She crossed her arms.

"I'm trying to write a death announcement." He scowled.

Katara raised her eyebrows. "You've given up?"

"You haven't? The spirits may have sent her back, but she is dying anyway. Nothing is going to pull her out of this. If there was an antidote we would have found it already." The fire in the brazier burned higher.

"Some poisons are receptive. If her poison does have an antidote, it could work quickly."

"Why are you still trying?" He asked the floor after a long pause.

"She's been trying to talk me out of it, believe me." She sat down on the edge of his desk. "You should go before it's too late. Have someone else take care of this. Whatever she has to say, it could be important."

* * *

><p>All the candles in the royal crypt were lit, hundreds of them lined the hall and surrounded the dais where Princess Azula was lying motionless with several sticks of incense burning out slowly. Orange blossoms were threaded through her hair, she smelled exactly as she had in life- like a fire fueled by fragrant wood. The warmth of each little flame combined and radiated off the black marble floors.<p>

Zuko slowly climbed the stairs, clutching an offering of firelilies. They wilted in his grasp. Hundreds of bouquets were already placed alongside the votives. He didn't know who had sent them. She was completely motionless, void of life, for a split second his heart dropped and fear flooded his consciousness then-

"You know I'm allergic to firelillies, Dum Dum." She spoke, without moving or opening her eyes.

"You are not. Now you're just being contrary." He dropped them on the lowest step of the dais, ascending the steps so he could face her.

"While I appreciate the gesture, they will only serve to make me more miserable." She spoke. The lights flickered ever so subtly.

"Katara's been trying to find something to help you."

Azula made a disgusted noise.

"I don't want her help."

"What did you say to her to make her so angry?" He crossed his arms. She still seemed determined to keep her eyes shut.

"I asked her if she thought it was wrong that I hoped my mother was dead. She asked me if it was wrong to wish that I was dead. Then she ran away. If I didn't know better I would say she's delirious. But I do, and she isn't. Besides," She laughed bitterly. "You and your friends will dance on my grave."

"You think so little of me, Azula." He replied sadly. "You are my sister. I never liked you, but I would never harm you."

She laughed again. She hated him for that. She hated his weakness, his inclination to be merciful, his refusal to fight her. She could not understand. She had been fighting all her life. For power, recognition and love. "You are a fool. A royal fool. I have never done anything to deserve your devotion, and I never wanted it."

"It's honorable to-"

"You and your honor, Zuko. You're so selfish. Always seeking respect and love with no regard for the people you might raze along the way. Perception of honor comes from within. You are honorable because _you believe_ you possess honor. If you fell off your moral high-horse you would see that. You will delude yourself into oblivion." The princess spat. She squinted up at his indistinguishable form, looming above her. "By your logic, _I _could be considered honorable. Because _I_ stayed loyal to the regime, _I _stayed here with father, and _I_ am the one dying by his hand. Don't try to tell me there's only one kind of honor Zuko." If she had any strength left, she would be screaming. If she had any strength left, she would be shredding the unmarred flesh of her brother's face with her nails. But that had been taken from her along with everything else, and her words would have to suffice.

"Did you do really do it for dad? Or did you do it for yourself?" Zuko was suddenly exhausted. He would give her anything she wanted at this point.

"I am the one dying at his feet." She gestured to their father's statue with a frail arm. "What do you think? He told me I was a necessary sacrifice. This was always my fate. I just didn't quite picture it in this manner. I can't picture anything actually. There are poisons that blind and poisons that open your eyes." She said pensively, blankly staring upward. "This one fucking blinded me."

"You really can't see anything at all?"

"No, it's too dark."

He looked around at the endless candle display, the enormous lanterns and the stars that practically blotted out the black of a moonless night. "It's the brightest night I've ever seen." He told her.

"Come closer. I want to see your face." She scooted over on the dais.

"Really? You want to see my ugly face?" He asked, clearly bemused.

"I have been a bit harsh, I suppose." She wrinkled her nose in distaste.

He joined her on the marble slab, both lying at the feet of the man they had once called their father. "I believe you called me a moping ugly bastard prince." He reminded her.

"Hm. I also kept you out of prison so you could take the fall for the Avatar still being alive after our show down in the crystal caves."

"I knew it!" He exclaimed.

"Don't flatter yourself. You never suspected. But after a while I realized your presence wasn't entirely detestable. I finally had someone to suffer with. Then you left. Things got exponentially worse. He blamed me..." Her eyes were shut again, her voice fading. "He treated me as he had once treated you."

Zuko didn't know what to say, so he kept his mouth shut. He was well aware that it could have been him in Azula's position.

"Describe the stars to me, Zuko." She said suddenly.

"What?" He blurted, his shock apparent.

"You said it was the brightest night you had ever seen."

"Well," He cleared his throat, trying to conceal his disbelief. "Do you remember the lanterns Mom used to hang around the turtleduck pond around festivals?" She replied with an imperceptible nod. "It's like that. Kind of. Except they are countless. They don't seem like normal stars- they're bigger. Stars usually look like tiny pinpricks… but these look like fire balls."

"Well, you're no poet Zuzu." She snorted.

"You asked!" He protested.

"Don't get defensive. I don't have the energy to argue with you. Now get off my stage you ineloquent , moping ugly bastard prince." She abruptly shoved him away, sending him toppling down the stairs and into a cluster of candles.

Zuko struggled to keep his anger contained when he managed to right himself. "Where has that side of you gone? When did you stop fighting?"

"I know when I am beaten." A slight smirk appeared at the corner of her lips. "A princess surrenders with honor."

Azula closed her eyes and drifted off into sleep. Zuko watched her as several of the candles were snuffed out. Her chest still shallowly rose up and down.

He retrieved the fire lilies on his decent and let them burn until they were nothing but ash sifting through his fingers.

* * *

><p>If Azula expected to encounter peace in death, she was sorely mistaken. The dreams that had plagued her more frequently as the poison slowly took hold were ceaseless now. She had been to the spirit world. She had no clear recollection of it, but when she witnessed her death she knew she was in a different place. Somewhere much more sinister than the benign universe filled with frustrating beings of questionable existence.<p>

One major difference was apparent. The Spirit World had been bathed in steady blue light. Here there was only a pervasive darkness, everything was black around the edges. Nothing glowed, no greater landscape appeared. Just darkness stretched out for all eternity.

She watched as Zuko fell to his knees beside her, the doomed red sun already risen. He silently lifted her from the dais, but she came apart like an over ripe fruit, seeping black tar like a fruit rotting from within. Her skin sloughed off, the rest of her hair fell away, she disintegrated until all that was left was a puddle of decay. He brother stepped over what was left.

"You'll never catch up!"

He was older now. She tried to follow him, but she didn't have any legs. "You're not my brother! He would never leave me! He needs me!" But he faded into shadow. Everyone else would leave her without a second thought. Not Zuko… Zuko would never leave her. The blackness stared back at her with radiant white eyes. _You are a dragon_. _Shadows do not daunt you. _

"Zuko?" She called out unsteadily. "Zuzu?" Her voice turned shrill.

The shadow came toward her swiftly. All she could do was allow it to consume her.

Zhao stood before her once again, her stupid reckless admiral. "You failed me." She accused the image. "I was 13 when you left. Even I knew never to take a victory for granted."

He finally glanced up at her, and she realized what he had been focusing on. A perfectly circular pond. His intent gaze indicated his wish for her to do the same. She approached the edge and peered into its depths. Two fish who were the perfect complimentary opposites of each other were swimming together in harmony.

"You are guarding them." She realized suddenly. She looked at Zhao, his hand always on his sword. He nodded solemnly in affirmation. "You are doomed to guard them." She added, noticing the heavy ice chains that held him in place. The manifestation of Zhao gave no reply this time, he was once again staring into the depths of the pool. She joined him.

Before she could divert her attention, the gentle rhythmic movements of the fish had ensnared her. It was impossible to move or cry out.

Her mother appeared in a ripple on the shimmering surface. _Tui and La, push and pull, for everything he cannot do, he has you Azula._ Her voice echoed, it called to her. She fell forward…

And plunged into a bucket of ice water.

The two fish continued to swim as the dense water pulled her down.

I always knew hell was cold. She thought faintly as the current wrapped its arms around her…

And pulled her out of the turtleduck pond and into the courtyard of her palace.

She heard her mother call out to her, she felt warm arms wrap around her.

"I was so worried!" Her mother said, running her fingers through Azula's wet hair.

"Please stop!" She was crying hysterically, writhing away from the woman whom she had once named her mother. "I want nothing to do with you. I am dead! I am dead, can't you see? There is nothing more you can take from me!"

"Oh, my daughter. To you, love was always a poison, an unacceptable liability. You drove yourself insane denying its existence."

"Don't speak to me of poison. I know what you did." She spat. "Your love never got me anywhere. I would raze entire countries to regain my birthright. I would burn worthless peasants alive in their houses. I would still slit your son's throat in his sleep."

"You would do those things only to prove that you are not weak. But you won't. It is not your fate, little princess. There is nothing you could do to make me love you less."

Azula scampered away. "Shut up!"

Ursa seemed to ripple like a reflection, disappearing before her eyes. _There is nothing you could do to make me love you less. _Something echoed as the courtyard was swept away like it had been erased from a canvas. She fell into open space, unable to grasp anything.

Finally she hit something solid. When she looked up, the Dragon of the West was glaring down at her in all his glory. "You have overstayed your welcome in the world of the living." He declared. "You have outlived your time."

"It seems we both have." She retorted.

"Now you must stand and fight." He told her, throwing a set of dao blades at her feet. "Two halves of a single weapon." He explained. She grabbed them, holding the hilts firmly. "If you wield them separately, they will always be at war with each other. They are two different parts of the same whole."

_Push and pull_. She thought, hefting the weight of the iron in her hands.

"I know your tricks uncle." She raised her swords. "You cannot fool me this time."

"You will not be fighting me, child."

The darkness parted momentarily, allowing the Blue Spirit to emerge, wielding only a single blade. Azula discovered she bore the other. She knew what she had to do, and her choices still appeared to be her own. She lunged forward, slashing at his mask, but as the edge connected with its target the faceless man was obliterated- shattering before her eyes and releasing millions of wailing voices, forcing her to her knees. Countless glowing faces surrounded her, suffocating her slowly, demanding that she accept the destiny laid out for her.

From somewhere deep within her, a war cry broke free from her lungs. Princess Azula rose up and threw her sword into the depths. Fire filled her entire being for what felt like the first time. A deafening crack preceded an explosion of blue fire that filled the visceral darkness. Each of the screeching faces disappeared in a tide of fire until not a single one was left. Azula was finally alone.

* * *

><p>The fires were burning bright in the Dragonbone Archives as the night deepened.<p>

Katara retrieved enormous tomes periodically, dropping them on one of the desks and letting the dust disperse. Some of them would crumble in her hands. Zuko himself had been staring at the same page for three quarters of an hour, suppressing vomit. He couldn't remember living without Azula- even while she was missing, even during his years in exile she was a slow burning dread at the back of his mind. He had left her without a goodbye, and she had not come looking for him. He believed that was better at the time. He couldn't bear to face her anyway. Not until he had proved himself by capturing the Avatar. "_What are you doing here?_" He had shouted without reservation, unsettled by her appearance. "_In my country, we exchange a pleasant hello before asking questions_." She had raised an eyebrow and favored him with her signature smirk.

He remembered her stinging words in the interior corridor, her hair chopped unevenly short. _All of us have scars Zuko. Most of us just have the decency to hide them_. Azula's scars were on the inside, he realized now. They were always threatening to reveal themselves, spilling over and flooding her consciousness unbidden. There was only so much you could internalize before it started to consume you. Before it reduced you to insanity.

Their Agni Kai still haunted him. The clash of blue and orange fire still appeared in his dreams, his scar ached when he was around her. He thought they were both going to die that day. They were equally matched, their attacks were of the same magnitude, nearly identical in power and brute force. Zuko's bending may have been short circuited by the lightning strike, but he could have mustered the strength to strangle her.

If Katara had not stepped in, they would have killed each other. Instead, they had both lived. But now Azula would not live to see the sun rise, and Zuko would awake to find he was alone.

"Thank you for being here." He told Katara gruffly. "I'm sorry."

"Zuko, please don't apologize." She said sternly.

"You can sleep if you want. We're not going to find anything. This is a fool's errand." Azula's final admonishment was still weighing heavily on his mind.

"Even if we don't, I've learned quite a lot of useful information." Katara shrugged, adjusting one of her hair-loopies. "There are so many different kinds of poison. They all effect people differently. Even if I knew all the herbal poisons there are _still_ limitless others." She sighed and aimlessly unrolled another scroll.

"One time Uncle Iroh made tea out of the white jade plant. He risked his life on the chance it could be a delectable tea." He mused.

Katara laughed so hard she dropped the scroll. "Classic Uncle Iroh." She said, wiping away a tear. Everyone called him Uncle Iroh, "Uncle" had practically become his first name. He was everyone's uncle now.

"Once," she laughed wistfully, "Before we knew his identity, King Bumi forced these rings of genemite on us. If Aang didn't pass his challenges it would have encased us. I don't believe he ever would have allowed it, but it was alarming all the same." Zuko glared down at the book again. "I wish I could find a poison that matched her symptoms. It's like someone placed her under a waterfall and she's slowly fading away." Katara's frown returned.

"Katara." He began tentatively. "How long do you reckon Azula has been sick?"

"Two and a half months, maybe longer."

"Have you come across a poison that lasts this long in anything? A scroll? A book?"

"No." She replied after a long pause. "No poison metabolizes this slowly."

"Unless…"

Katara drew in a sharp breath. "_No_." She whispered in disbelief.

"Unless she's still being poisoned." Zuko stood up.

"That's impossible!" Katara insisted, coming to her senses. Zuko was already running toward the serpentine steps that led up into a court yard. "There has been nothing consistently contaminating her! During those two months she's been traveling! The only people who have been constantly with her are _us_!"

"That's not the only way." He said. "Prolonged contact with something containing poison could have the same effect you were wondering about."

"But what could possibly…"

"There's no time!" He broke into a run. Perhaps he was already too late.

Both the healer and the Fire Lord vaulted up the steps of the Coronation Temple, not daring to catch their breath. Zuko collapsed beside his sister while Katara took her pulse. He scrambled to uncover her fragile hand.

"She's still breathing, but she won't stir now. She won't wake up."

Zuko held her hand, studying the ring on her thumb. "I never asked her how she got this back. My bet's on one of Long Feng's minions."

"Your father's ring?" Katara gasped.

Zuko slid it from her finger, throwing caution to the wind.

They waited silently for a moment, and then another. For a moment Zuko thought her skin seemed less gray…

He analyzed the ring for a moment before throwing it onto the marble floor and crushing it with a heavy metal boot.

Immediately a substance like molten silver leeched out onto the ground.

"Don't touch it!" Katara said frantically. "It looks like some kind of metal…"

"We should get Toph." Zuko replied.

Katara called their friend's name, knowing that if she called loudly enough the earth bender would come.

"This poison was certainly chosen by Long Feng. Can you help her now?" He asked desperately.

Katara knelt on the dais once more. "Her pulse is coming back." Katara said suddenly, laughing in disbelief. "She's warming up! Maybe removing the source was enough to make a difference. Now that I have a visual for the poison it will be easier to identify and make and antidote. We'll ask some earthbenders what they know as well… Zuko… I never thought I would say this, but I think she's going to live."

He looked pale, running his fingers through his hair and trying to conceal his tears. "You should go right now. I'll wait for Toph. We should leave Azula here… I wouldn't want to disrupt her in this delicate state."

"Of course." Katara gave him an understanding smile and took that as her queue to leave.

But Zuko managed not to weep. "You would hate me for this." He addressed his unconscious sister. "You would order me to stop crying like a child." He bent over to kiss her forehead. "He will never hurt you again." He whispered. "I promise."

* * *

><p>Azula woke up just as the sun was beginning to rise over the capital. Her fire had returned. She stood up, feeling stronger than she had since she had escaped from the sages. The palace was deserted, for which she was grateful. It would not do to have some peasant witness her leaving what was meant to be her funeral pyre. After a few moments, she noticed the familiar weight on her finger had been removed.<p>

The blackened remnants of the golden ring beside her indicated what happened.

She picked it up gingerly. The full consequences of the situation were slowly dawning on her. "There is nothing for me here." She said to herself, looking into the brightening sun.

Her fellow firebenders would rise soon as well.

So Azula made to make her way down the volcano on the main road, still wearing her funeral shroud.

Perhaps she would find passage on a ship, or hitch a ride to _somewhere else_.

Ozai had been a powerful ruler whose plans had been prematurely foiled. But she would not make the same mistakes. She would be greater than her father, greater than all her ancestors.

_I shall live to conquer once more._

* * *

><p><strong>This has been a veritable odyssey. Thank you to everyone who makes it to this final note, for persevering through my abundant symbolism and anviliciousness, pathos and melodrama. <strong>

**Note on this chapter: Azula's apparent dreams were real to her. She ended up in an alternate spirit world that runs in conjunction with the one we see in the show. There must be a part of the spirit world that houses the corporeal world's demons, and that is where she was, trapped between life and death in a deplorable spiritual state of mind. **

**In case anyone is wondering, my ATLA tumblr presence is borne-of-fire-and-blood **

**Goodbye, my lovely, intelligent readers! I hope you enjoy this story as it comes full circle. **


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